What Should I Do?

[nanglgrl]

Twice in the last couple weeks I've interviewed families that wanted to start here but that weren't a good fit for my program.

Both times I started the interview and quickly realized they were telling me they wanted to use my services so I worked in that I had other interviews to do for the opening and would let them know by x date what my decision would be. I let them know that I need to make the best decision for my family and the group.

Then both times they tried to bargain with me and so I would take their child and I reiterate that I have other interviews to conduct. Nothing was wrong with either family. They were both very nice and could be a great fit for someone else.

Then on x date I emailed (I hate breaking the news on the phone because I'm afraid I will say something that they take the wrong way) and tell them I enjoyed meeting them but have decided to go with another family but can add them to a waiting list should I have future openings. I don't actually plan on adding them as I already determined they weren't a good fit but I don't know what else to say. I hate hurting people's feelings and it seems like both times something I said upset them.

What do you do before an interview to let the family know that you are also interviewing others and just because they like your program you may not have a spot for them? How do you break it to a really nice family that they aren't right for your program without making it sound like something's wrong with them?

I would have no problem if the family came in and the parents and or child was disrespectful, rude or just plain horrible letting them know that I wasn't accepting them and why. I turned one family down because mom said her 4 year old doesn't like being told what to do so she gave her choices instead but the only choices I heard during the interview were do this or don't do this either way there will be no consequence.

There were other little things but nothing big. The other family I turned away because they treated their 14 month old like an infant (different culture) and I just let a child go who was like this at 14 months and it was a horrible experience. I don't mean they just baby talked I mean they still spoon fed and didn't attempt to let him try and even after a month of hand over hand feeding he still wouldn't even try. They also had a lot if other things that pointed to the child needing a nanny instead of group care.

I'm glad I'm at a point where I can be picky but with that comes a slew of other problems.

Do I just tell parents a vague "I decided to go in another direction" and leave it at that?

[daycare]

Twice in the last couple weeks I've interviewed families that wanted to start here but that weren't a good fit for my program. Both times I started the interview and quickly realized they were telling me they wanted to use my services so I worked in that I had other interviews to do for the opening and would let them know by x date what my decision would be. I let them know that I need to make the best decision for my family and the group. Then both times they tried to bargain with me and so I would take their child and I reiterate that I have other interviews to conduct. Nothing was wrong with either family. They were both very nice and could be a great fit for someone else. Then on x date I emailed (I hate breaking the news on the phone because I'm afraid I will say something that they take the wrong way) and tell them I enjoyed meeting them but have decided to go with another family but can add them to a waiting list should I have future openings. I don't actually plan on adding them as I already determined they weren't a good fit but I don't know what else to say. I hate hurting people's feelings and it seems like both times something I said upset them. What do you do before an interview to let the family know that you are also interviewing others and just because they like your program you may not have a spot for them? How do you break it to a really nice family that they aren't right for your program without making it sound like something's wrong with them? I would have no problem if the family came in and the parents and or child was disrespectful, rude or just plain horrible letting them know that I wasn't accepting them and why. I turned one family down because mom said her 4 year old doesn't like being told what to do so she gave her choices instead but the only choices I heard during the interview were do this or don't do this either way there will be no consequence. There were other little things but nothing big. The other family I turned away because they treated their 14 month old like an infant (different culture) and I just let a child go who was like this at 14 months and it was a horrible experience. I don't mean they just baby talked I mean they still spoon fed and didn't attempt to let him try and even after a month of hand over hand feeding he still wouldn't even try. They also had a lot if other things that pointed to the child needing a nanny instead of group care. I'm glad I'm at a point where I can be picky but with that comes a slew of other problems. Do I just tell parents a vague "I decided to go in another direction" and leave it at that?

I have encountered this in the past, but unlike you I don't really get a chance to be too picky. Unless I see huge red flags, I would still give them a try. This is why I have a two week paid trial. I tend to try not to judge the kids or families for the way the kids behave while here during an interview or for the way a family raises their child.

I know that the children will act one way while the parents are here and another way when they are not here.

BUT if you really think that they are a bad fit, I would just really let them know in the interview process that you are very picky about who you bring into the DC. That you are looking for an over all fit. Which means a child who will play well wit the other kids, the families request for hours of care works and a family that is willing to accept all the policies of our daycare and work together with you for the sake of their child.

I do tell families that I am somewhat picky about who I let in. I do have a great group of kids. They don't hit each other, I don't have bitters, I don't have kids who are bullies and etc.

BUt then again, I also allow the 2 week paid trial to really get an idea if it will work out or not. If not, then I can term at any time.

In your situation, I would be honest and tell them I really appreciate you taking the time out of your day to see what we have to offer, but I am not able to meet your families needs at this time. Thank you for your inquiry.

leave it at that.

[playdate4]

In your situation, I would be honest and tell them I really appreciate you taking the time out of your day to see what we have to offer, but I am not able to meet your families needs at this time. Thank you for your inquiry.

leave it at that.

[Meeko]

I point blank tell ALL interviewees that I am interviewing several other families and that by so-and-so date I will decide which child I want to take.

I word it just like that. It takes the wind out of the sails of the "we want to hire you" group and puts things firmly in my court. MY daycare. MY decision as to who fills the spot.

Then, I usually find the family I choose is always chuffed to be the "chosen" one (it appeals to their ego) and they then (usually) mind their p's and q's to make sure they keep the spot.