I Guess I'm Going To Have To Get A Backbone On This...

[crazydaycarelady]

Older sibs coming in at pick-up and wanting things.

I actually DO still have this 5yo in care but only on Fridays. I have the little sis everyday. So everyday at pick up dcb comes in. I am very rural so there would be no problem at all with him waiting in his car seat but he comes in to check things out.

Two days ago it was apples. His sister was munching on an apple so he begged for one too. His mom is no help at all and just looks at me like "I pay you a lot of money, give Q an apple!"

Yesterday it was witch hats. I made 12, one for each kid here. Dcb comes in "Where is my witch hat??" There was about 8 people here because it was closing time and I had one hat left over because a baby didn't take hers so I just gave it to him to get him out of here. Again dcm is no help.

But tomorrow is going to be a problem. I got little pumpkin tins for all the kids (that will be here tomorrow - 12 kids) and I made popcorn balls and rice krispie treats and filled them with treats. There won't be one for dcb. He is gonna throw a fit, I can see it already!

He goes to his own school and does projects there so maybe I will say something to that effect, but I know his school doesn't celebrate Halloween.

[littlemissmuffet]

I don't allow siblings to come in. Simple. Tell mom it's causing unnecessary drama and longer pick ups than you like. The sib is obviously more than welcome on Fridays, but Monday-Thursday there's no need for him escort mom during the short pick up of younger child.

[Unregistered]

Sorry bud, I inly have enough for the daycare kids!

[Blackcat31]

You need to give this back to the DCM.

Tell her that SHE needs to fix this. You aren't in the position to give things to everyone NOT in attendance that day. Tell her all the other DCK's have siblings too that want things and you can't do it.

Tell her if he continues and she doesn't step up so you aren't the bad guy, you are going to buy some treats and bill her for them.

I certainly wouldn't allow her to make me the bad guy in this situation.

I don't allow non-attending children to come in. My entry way isn't big enough to handle everyone so siblings aren't allowed to get out of the car or come in.

[CedarCreek]

I'd just say, "Sorry buddy, these are for the kids that come here. I'm sure Mom wouldn't mind getting you a special something on the way home."

Then smile like this at mom

She won't bring him in again. ::

[Unregistered]

i would make sure the sibling in care, is not eating or doing anything around pick up time, and I would also put all crafts away from view etc. anything that the sibling might ask for I would "hide". Im sure he will find something else to ask for, its a habit now, just nicely say something like we don't have any..sorry.ask mommy to get you some.

I dont allow siblings past the entrance, I never give food to go, not even water, I put all requests back on the parent. Child: I want an apple. Me:mommys going to give you one when you get home, okay? or the usual, i don't have anymore, with a big smile.Child:I want to use the restroom:Meh its busy or dirty.Child: I want a project:Me: These are for so and so,mommy can make you one at home.The first time you give in, expect it to happen everyday!
I used to have a beautiful large bowl with fruit on the table, and kids, and sometimes parents would ask for some to go, so I now put all foods away from view, I had sandwich request right by the door, bottles of water, milk, cookies,sippy cup or bay bottle refills etc. NO .Also when children at pick up say , Im hungry, i say yes, its dinner time, mommy is going to feed you, etc.pretty soon they stop asking...I dont feel bad, I already fed them all day long, they just like to play this games because they know their parents have no backbone and God forgive they say No..
All this requests at addressed at the interview, I do not give food to go,nothing, if you want your child to eat in the car, be prepared with your food, but of course parents act like they forget.

[MarinaVanessa]

I agree about putting it back onto the mom.
I'd talk to her today in advance.

"Susan as you know Sibling has shown an interest in having his own share of what I give to my daycare children. Now at first I was fine with it but Im afraid of it continuing and becoming a regular thing. I don't want to hurt his feelings which is why I wanted to talk to you about it. Tomorrow ill be giving the daycare kids baskets for Halloween and I have enough to make twelve. Like I said, I dont want to hurt Siblings feelings. Each basket will cost me $7 to make so if you'd like him to have one tomorrow you're more than welcome to leave me the $7 today and ill get supplies to make an extra one for him also"

For the rest of the time you simply have to say no when he asks for things.

"I'm sorry Sibling. I only made enough witches hats for each of my daycare kids and I don't have an extra one. I'm sure mommy will make one for you at home of you ask her. "

"I'd love to give you an apple Sibling but I need those apples for tomorrow and I only have enough for my daycare kids. I'm sure mommy will give you an apple when you get home. What? You don't have apples at home? I'm sure mommy will get some when she goes to the store. "

One thing I do is to not leave any supplies out including food. All of my supplies and food is put away and I only pull out what I need for each child. If a sibling or parent as me for one "to go" I just say I don't have one to give.

[My3cents]

You need to give this back to the DCM.

Tell her that SHE needs to fix this. You aren't in the position to give things to everyone NOT in attendance that day. Tell her all the other DCK's have siblings too that want things and you can't do it.

Tell her if he continues and she doesn't step up so you aren't the bad guy, you are going to buy some treats and bill her for them.

I certainly wouldn't allow her to make me the bad guy in this situation.

I don't allow non-attending children to come in. My entry way isn't big enough to handle everyone so siblings aren't allowed to get out of the car or come in.

I need to add this to my policy book and no strollers or car seats to be left at daycare- I don't have the room for that or want the mess from that.

[My3cents]

Older sibs coming in at pick-up and wanting things.

I actually DO still have this 5yo in care but only on Fridays. I have the little sis everyday. So everyday at pick up dcb comes in. I am very rural so there would be no problem at all with him waiting in his car seat but he comes in to check things out.

Two days ago it was apples. His sister was munching on an apple so he begged for one too. His mom is no help at all and just looks at me like "I pay you a lot of money, give Q an apple!"

Yesterday it was witch hats. I made 12, one for each kid here. Dcb comes in "Where is my witch hat??" There was about 8 people here because it was closing time and I had one hat left over because a baby didn't take hers so I just gave it to him to get him out of here. Again dcm is no help.

But tomorrow is going to be a problem. I got little pumpkin tins for all the kids (that will be here tomorrow - 12 kids) and I made popcorn balls and rice krispie treats and filled them with treats. There won't be one for dcb. He is gonna throw a fit, I can see it already!

He goes to his own school and does projects there so maybe I will say something to that effect, but I know his school doesn't celebrate Halloween.

I have one that comes once in a while an older sibling and one time when he was here for care I told him when he is not in daycare he needs to stay on the mat and wait for his brother. He walks here and will ask for water and I always give him that or let him use the bathroom, but I put a stop to the rest of it. He would ask what snack was and hint. Now when he wants to come in and play and get the other kids worked up I tell him No. The parents don't tell him No so I just step in and do it and try to be as nice as I can and get the point across. This kid see's me as his caregiver sometimes so its kind of hard. I always do a little something for him on the holidays. I do have him once in a while and am thankful for that. Its hard- I won't be doing anything for Halloween for him this year, he does his thing in school. If he was here on Halloween I would- Don't be afraid to say NO- to the parent or the child.

[lovemykidstoo]

I would definitely not give him any food. I would have it put away and if he asks, I would tell him Oh I'm sorry, I've already put it away and besides, you dont' want to ruin your dinner.

As far as wanting the projects, I would say, oh the daycare kids made those today, what did you do at school today.

For the holiday treat, I would make him one. Afterall, he is there 1 day a week, so technically he is one of your dck's. I think that's only fair. I'm sure it's not that much of a cost to do it and it would be nice even though he might get one somewhere else too.