New Here And I Really Need Help With DCB

[Familycare71]

Definetly sounds like he could be on the spectrum... BUT I find myself thinking that so much lately I am starting to doubt my gut on it.:confused:

[Angelsj]

I started watching a new boy about 3 weeks ago and it has been a disaster. The boy is 4 and he is having a difficult time here. I have a 4 year old boy of mine own, and the daycare boy doesn't want to play with him, in fact he doesn't want to play with anything. He just walks around my house doing nothing all day. He is very sensitive and covers his ears his ears if the other kids get loud. He also cries if he hears certain words(not naughty words, just normal words) and screams and says he doesn't like those words. He also doesn't understand how to play pretend, my son will cook pretend food in his play kitchen and try to serve the boy, and he cries and freaks out and says he wants real food. He also cried when my son put leaves on his leg when they were outside playing. Another thing I have noticed is that he is very concerned that the other kids are trying to get and eat his lunch. He cries even if another kid gets too close to him when he eats. Ugh I just don't know what to do. Oh yeah he also freaked out because my 1 year old son didn't have a shirt on.
Those are just the things I can think of right off the top of my head, but I know there are plenty more examples. It's like he has no idea how to play. even when I set out activities like crayons, or play doh he will do it for like 5 minutes and then cry and say he can't do it anymore. I just don't know but something is off. This just can't be normal behavior. I understand some kids need time to adjust but this is just really extreme.
I really need some advice as to what to do. Thanks.

I would suggest to the parents that a developmental evaluation would be in his best interest. Gently.

You cannot really diagnose a child, but some things that might help YOU.
A child with Asperger's is extra or less sensitive to many stimuli. They may not be able to stand touching people or substances (shaving cream, certain foods or play doh.)
Certain sounds may actually hurt his ears, and they do not have to be sounds you can hear. One of my sons can "hear" the blue screen on the TV, even if the sound is all the way down, and he can "hear" fluorescent lighting.
They may be sensitive to smell. I have one that can smell perfume on a person two aisles away in a store, and another that cannot smell ANYTHING that isn't directly under his nose and very strong.
Two of my kids have issues with eye focus or wandering eyes, while one has the eyesight of an eagle and can see and read a license plate on a car up to a half mile away.

An Aspie may be as much as two years below their peers in development (motor skills, emotional, etc.) These kids, though often quite smart, behave very often like children two or even three years younger. This discrepancy will get larger for a while, then get smaller again, so a three year old may act like a two year old, but a 4 yo can also act that way.
Just understanding things from their point of view can go a long way toward helping these kids. Helping them understand what they are dealing with can help as well.
"You are ok, we will just brush the leaves off of your leg." "It is ok that *** doesn't have a shirt on, it is not against the rules here for babies." (this is offending his sense of rules, which is very strong with Aspies. Everything has rules.)
Don't expect him to stick with anything longer than a two year old would...etc.

[nannyde]

I just spoke to the mom and told her how he seems to have a lot of anxiety when he is here. She then told me how he is now hitting her and that he has never hit anyone ever before starting at my house. She also said that he loved this old daycare and had so much fun there. Maybe he just isn't a good fit. He also washes his hands all the time and yesterday I asked him why and he said because of baby germs. I'm pretty sure she is going to find someone else, I don't need the money so it's really NBD if he leaves, I just hate seeing an unhappy 4 year old. My cousin also mentioned that maybe he is on the spectrum, but I have no experience with it so I have no idea.

Ask her for the name of the center and to sign a consent for you to speak to them.

[countrymom]

ok, is he an only child. Sounds to me like he is. I will bet you that at home, its quiet, that he plays alone and does his own thing. And he may be hitting mom because he's mad at her, he's 4 he knows whats going on.

also, I wonder if something was going on at the center, because I don't know too many kids who use the words "baby germs"

[Daisy]

He isn't the only child, he has an older brother. He might get the baby germ thing from his mom because when I interviewed her she told me she has OCD. Mom also told me that he doesn't fall asleep until 11pm and he gets up at 7am. I'm wondering if him being so exhausted has a lot to do with it. She said she puts him to bed at 8 and he watches tv in his room until 11 when he falls asleep. I want to tell mom to get the tv out of his room, A 4 year old doesn't need a tv in their room. AAAHHHHH

[clep]

I had a child on the spectrum. The parents had no idea as it was their only child and they thought her behavior was "normal". I spoke with them a few times about it and then one day told them that if they didn't speak to someone about her and have her tested I would me making a call that would require it.

They were very upset with me, but did make the call and have her tested. I made some calls to get her into a special school and she is there to this day progressing very nicely. They had to take her out of my day home to accommodate the new program, but we are really close still and they share their gratitude often with me about being pushed to get her checked.

Basically, I think it is important to very clearly communicate developmental issues. I personally wouldn't give up on this child and send him somewhere else. I would start a journal and work with the parents to help him through whatever it is he is facing. That's just me thought.

[clep]

Ask her for the name of the center and to sign a consent for you to speak to them.

This too!!! On my admission forms I require the phone number and name of the last place of care. Not only does that allow me some background info on the child if required, it ensures parents that are less than truthful are weed themselves out right away.

[Unregistered]

I had a child similar this past summer, 4 years old getting ready for kindergarden
certain tones and loud noises and she would flip, didnt like to play with others , didnt show intrest in projects and would not eat unless junk ...chips ex which well we dont eat here often but I used it as a test

mom knew this child had some sort of issues
and while here she did improve and gave examples of proof ...which of course is wonderfull to hear
the child would try something ( like putting shoes on ) and would have melt down when unsecussfull ( wouldnt try to hard either ) and I would encourge mom to not help and let her try ..I would repeat over and over to the child " do not give up "
she is now in kindergarden and the school is having her assested ....
we at this time do not have results .......
if you have a day care child suport ...phone them and pick their brains
this child still comes for visits and events