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At what age do you think a child should be able to fall asleep independently? I have a child who is 11 months old and I still have to hold him until he falls asleep. If he wakes up after I lay him down I have to hold him again until he falls asleep. This is so unreasonable for me with my group of kids. I have 3 other kids under 3 that I need to tend to during his 2 naps (he's awake at everyone else's nap time). It takes me 5-10 minutes of standing in the other room (big open archway in between) holding him, rocking him and patting his back for him to fall asleep. And even though I can see the other kids you guys know with a tough group even 2 minutes of not being RIGHT there is disastrous. Right now I'm just about over it. My back is KILLING me from trying to get him to sleep. I was in there with him for 10 minutes and kept having to verbally redirect the children and try to remind everyone to be quiet. DD has just gotten back from her dads so she was all wound up. I have another 18mo old who is dancing and screeching. He finally falls asleep, I lay him down, he gets up and acts awake. I popped into the other room redirect the kids, go back in, pick him up and have to start all over. Then he falls asleep, I laid him down and someone screeched from the other room. He woke up, I just laid him down and told him ni-night and now hes standing up making noises and trying to get my attention. He will NOT put himself to sleep or stay asleep without assistance. I can't keep this up. Is this an unreasonable expectation? To have an almost 1 year old be able to fall asleep unassisted? I don't think so but I don't know how to bring it up to the parents. HELPP!!!!!
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Just to answer your question....
at birth.
Is that the way everyone does it? No...but I truly believe that any child CAN fall asleep on their own from Day 1. In fact, it should be what their best at...2nd best should be eating and consequently, pooping.
An 11 month old here would get first a routine, then a "Ferber" method sleep training. If that didn't work really quick, it would absolutely be a good cuddle, a dark room, all the white noise I could come up with, and CIO. Stone cold, baby...
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For all kids under 2 it is sight and sound. While I'm putting him down I need to be able to see my other under 2 kid. And while he is asleep he can be in a different room but the door can't be closed (doesn't matter because there is no door. The doorway between rooms is a huge 4ft wide arched walk way). I have to check on him every 10 minutes while he's sleeping... but it doesn't matter because he never fell asleep! :
: I think I am going to tell them they need to sleep train him or I can't provide care. It makes me nervous not being able to be right there with my other kids. So much can happen when you are 10-15 ft away holding an infant, especially with my group... I also suspect that they co-sleep, but every time I ask they kind of dance around it and never answer the question.
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I beleive this too. All of our infants put them selves to sleep, unless they fall asleep in a swing. We work with them on self-soothing, but only to give them the skills - never doing it for them.Just to answer your question....
at birth.
Is that the way everyone does it? No...but I truly believe that any child CAN fall asleep on their own from Day 1. In fact, it should be what their best at...2nd best should be eating and consequently, pooping.
An 11 month old here would get first a routine, then a "Ferber" method sleep training. If that didn't work really quick, it would absolutely be a good cuddle, a dark room, all the white noise I could come up with, and CIO. Stone cold, baby...Comment
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You don't have to hold him until he falls asleep......you're *choosing* to at this point
Heidi gave great advice as to how to break the cycle of what you're currentlyvdoing. To add, I'd require mom and dad do the same or you're going to have one heck of an uphill battle to struggle the next many months over.Comment
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I never rock to sleep. It quickly becomes a habit and is hard to break. If they are old enough to be in daycare, they are old enough to learn to self sooth.Comment
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That's where I'm at. Tomorrow starts laying him down and walking away. I don't care how long it takes him. I'm not going to pick him up, just reassure him. I'm over it.
Edit: To say, this boy just started. He used to be in my care when he was 4-7 mo old. They left because of a job issue and now cam back. He's been here 3 weeks. When he used to be here I just had to lay him down and he fell asleep. Now that he's back he won't sleep like that in the least. But I'm done! No more holding him. Ain't nobody got time for that!
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He'll get used to it! Don't give in, my little guy took about a week and then it was bliss!
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Just to answer your question....
at birth.
Is that the way everyone does it? No...but I truly believe that any child CAN fall asleep on their own from Day 1. In fact, it should be what their best at...2nd best should be eating and consequently, pooping.
An 11 month old here would get first a routine, then a "Ferber" method sleep training. If that didn't work really quick, it would absolutely be a good cuddle, a dark room, all the white noise I could come up with, and CIO. Stone cold, baby...
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Who said this to you?? This is FALSE!! SIGHT OR SOUND!!For all kids under 2 it is sight and sound. While I'm putting him down I need to be able to see my other under 2 kid. And while he is asleep he can be in a different room but the door can't be closed (doesn't matter because there is no door. The doorway between rooms is a huge 4ft wide arched walk way). I have to check on him every 10 minutes while he's sleeping... but it doesn't matter because he never fell asleep! :: I think I am going to tell them they need to sleep train him or I can't provide care. It makes me nervous not being able to be right there with my other kids. So much can happen when you are 10-15 ft away holding an infant, especially with my group... I also suspect that they co-sleep, but every time I ask they kind of dance around it and never answer the question.
do you have a copy of the regs?
and you CAN have a door closed!!Comment
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Yes, it will get worse before it gets better. But when it gets better, it is so much nicer. At 11 months, the only thing I would do is walk back and lay him down when he stands up in his PnP.Comment
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That's my plan! During his first round here, the parents didn't believe in him 'crying it out' and at that age I kind of agree. But now its a different story. Dad says he likes to fall asleep on chest, mom says she lays him down in his crib and he falls asleep.. So I'm not sure who duped me but it stops here! I will go in and lay him down 15x but I am not holding him for him to sleep any more. Problem is its hard with my set up.... Oh well. He will get used to it or transition to 1 nap (not my preference at that age but it is what it is).
Wish me luck tomorrow!!! ::::
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YUP! It's harder to sleep train an older infant, too. Why do parents do this to their kids? I have a 3yo still rocked to sleep at home.Just to answer your question....
at birth.
Is that the way everyone does it? No...but I truly believe that any child CAN fall asleep on their own from Day 1. In fact, it should be what their best at...2nd best should be eating and consequently, pooping.
An 11 month old here would get first a routine, then a "Ferber" method sleep training. If that didn't work really quick, it would absolutely be a good cuddle, a dark room, all the white noise I could come up with, and CIO. Stone cold, baby...Comment
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to everything Heidi said! That's how it's done here to!
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