Send Child Home For Continually Assaulting Another Child?

[Unregistered]

One of my DCK keeps hitting, kicking, pulling hair. Every time it turn around the victim has another accusation. I've witnessed the aggressor at least a dozen times assault the victim. This just started this morning but has been going on non stop for the last 90 minutes. I want to send DCM a text warning her if it continues DCK will need to be picked up for the day.

Would you warn DCM and send home if it continues?

[SunshineMama]

One of my DCK keeps hitting, kicking, pulling hair. Every time it turn around the victim has another accusation. I've witnessed the agressor at least a dozen times assault the victim. This just started this morning but has been going on non stop for the last 90 minutes. I want to send DCM a text warning her if it continues DCK will need to be picked up for the day.

Would you warn DCM and send home if it continues?

Why would you let that go on for 90 minutes.?

Is this even a real question or a troll?

[countrymom]

first i'm wondering if this is a troll question too.

but if not, where the heck are you as a provider and why would you let this happen.

[Willow]

One of my DCK keeps hitting, kicking, pulling hair. Every time it turn around the victim has another accusation. I've witnessed the agressor at least a dozen times assault the victim. This just started this morning but has been going on non stop for the last 90 minutes. I want to send DCM a text warning her if it continues DCK will need to be picked up for the day.

Would you warn DCM and send home if it continues?

Absolutely warn mom, but it's your job as the provider to be proactive once you've witnessed aggressive behavior. Separate the two, supervise, try to identify triggers and intervene before the aggressor has an opportunity to lash out.

There's no reason the child should have had the opportunity to hurt someone else that many times without serious intervention on your part to avoid future assaults.

[Sugar Magnolia]

Um......yes

[Unregistered]

He needs to go home asap no warning

[Leigh]

One of my DCK keeps hitting, kicking, pulling hair. Every time it turn around the victim has another accusation. I've witnessed the agressor at least a dozen times assault the victim. This just started this morning but has been going on non stop for the last 90 minutes. I want to send DCM a text warning her if it continues DCK will need to be picked up for the day.

Would you warn DCM and send home if it continues?

First, this behavior is normal for a child under 2.5. If the child is older than that, I would most definitely be sending the child home. Under 2.5, I would ATTEMPT to head off the behavior myself and deal with it here. If it becomes too much, the child would be sent home for the day.

Kids under 3 just simply do better with one-on-one play. Is it possible to find an older kid to assign to play with him for a while? Some kids under 3 are very social creatures (especially the ones that grow up in daycare), but developmentally, they just aren't generally capable of empathy and the concept of social rules. However, they DO understand what "no" means, and telling them "No, hitting hurts, use gentle hands". Repeat this phrase 2,000 times, and they'll get it.

How I would deal with the situation depends on the age and maturity level of the child, but if the situation is one where you feel that the child needs so much supervision today that you just can't keep the victim safe, I would send home regardless of age.

[Unregistered]

I am not a troll. The assaults are very mild. And I have intervened and am keeping a very close eye on both children. I also have 2 infants that I'm caring for at the same time, literally every time I turn around the victim says so and so pulled my hair/hit me/touched me/took this away from me. I keep separating the 2 kids. I've never dealt with continuous behavior like his before and wasn't sure if it's something you all would send home for.

The victim has not been injured or really hurt at all. The issue is the aggressor seems to have a major issue with keeping their hands to themselves and the victim is very sensitive that I think some if the "hits" are just touches. I have witnessed a few times where it really is a little rougher than that.

Sorry for not being more clear on the severity. I just quickly typed the original post to get opinions while I had a minute.

Would you warn mom and send home if aggressor makes contact again?

[Play Care]

I am not a troll. The assaults are very mild. And I have intervened and am keeping a very close eye on both children. I also have 2 infants that I'm caring for at the same time, literally every time I turn around the victim says so and so pulled my hair/hit me/touched me/took this away from me. I keep separating the 2 kids. I've never dealt with continuous behavior like his before and wasn't sure if it's something you all would send home for.

The victim has not been injured or really hurt at all. The issue is the aggressor seems to have a major issue with keeping their hands to themselves and the victim is very sensitive that I think some if the "hits" are just touches. I have witnessed a few times where it really is a little rougher than that.

Sorry for not being more clear on the severity. I just quickly typed the original post to get opinions while I had a minute.

Would you warn mom and send home if aggressor makes contact again?

You need to keep the aggressor in your site at all times! If you can't do that, they yes, send home *and* terminate care. I get that infants can be demanding, but essentially what you are saying is that you can't adequately care for *all* the children in your care.

[Unregistered]

Just caught victim lying. Now I don't know how many of the accusations are real. Ugh! I've witnessed aggressor being to physical but it doesn't seem bad, but now I know victim is making some false accusations.

[Familycare71]

You need to keep the aggressor in your site at all times! If you can't do that, they yes, send home *and* terminate care. I get that infants can be demanding, but essentially what you are saying is that you can't adequately care for *all* the children in your care.

I agree!
In my opinion you need to have the child be your shadow and do a better job of supervising... Not being mean- just being honest. If you can't fully supervise the children your watching then you have too many. Things happen in a second- I think we all understand this but to have 90 min of it and you have only seen it a hand full of times in that period- that concerns me.

[Unregistered]

The agresor needs to be supervised 100% meaning hes by your side at all times and he needs to fe busy

[Unregistered]

I agree!
In my opinion you need to have the child be your shadow and do a better job of supervising... Not being mean- just being honest. If you can't fully supervise the children your watching then you have too many. Things happen in a second- I think we all understand this but to have 90 min of it and you have only seen it a hand full of times in that period- that concerns me.

I just posted that I caught one of the so called pushes and there was no contact. It seems that it is false accusations and that is why I've only seen it happen a few times and it was minor touches that were said to be hits.

[Leigh]

Just caught victim lying. Now I don't know how many of the accusations are real. Ugh! I've witnessed aggressor being to physical but it doesn't seem bad, but now I know victim is making some false accusations.

This happens with kids, too. Keep the kids where you can supervise 100% until the behavior improves. I have a 4 yo that LOVES to lie to get his little brother in trouble. I don't believe it until I SEE it.

[Familycare71]

I just posted that I caught one of the so called pushes and there was no contact. It seems that it is false accusations and that is why I've only seen it happen a few times and it was minor touches that were said to be hits.

I still stand by what I said- very well may be victim is lying. If they are always in your site line you will know. I would find it odd for a kid to go from no issues to frequent aggression. Maybe a little of both?
Good luck