Encouraging bad behavior.

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

I need advice quickly. I have a brother 4yrs old, and his sister, 1.5yrs old that come to my dayhome.

He has been encouraging her to hit and hurt my other 1.5 yr old dcg.

I have told him a bazillion times that that's not nice, etc, etc. Nothing is working. Mom knows and has spoken to him about this too.

DCG can get pretty nasty without her brother helping her along too.

So what would you do?

[Blackcat31]

He'd be my shadow until he understands that behavior isn't cool, fun or rewarding in ANY way.

I'd also remove privileges and/or fun activities EVERY.SINGLE time he encouraged someone else to behave badly.

[Brooksie]

I need advice quickly. I have a brother 4yrs old, and his sister, 1.5yrs old that come to my dayhome.

He has been encouraging her to hit and hurt my other 1.5 yr old dcg.

I have told him a bazillion times that that's not nice, etc, etc. Nothing is working. Mom knows and has spoken to him about this too.

DCG can get pretty nasty without her brother helping her along too.

So what would you do?

Here, If you hit, you sit. And Encouraging someone else to hit is the same thing in my book. Especially from a 4 year old who KNOWS what he is doing. I would sternly tell dcb that that behavior is unacceptable and if he continues that behavior he will have to sit out. I would then redirect this sister and tell her "no, hitting hurts" or 'Hands are for helping, NOT hitting". If DCB encouraged it again he would be removed from the play area, sat down and I would say "sit here until your time is up." Set the timer for 4 minutes and then when its up go back over to him and discuss with him why is there and what you expect of him. Make sure he understands that it is his action that is causing the problem and you will not tolerate it. Also try to get him involved in some activities that make him feel like he is a helper and has a responsibility to help care for the little ones. Give him something to have pride in instead of free time to encourage bad behavior. Good luck!