Really?!?!

[Blackcat31]

Thank you for this. It's totally not daycare or thread related (sorry op) but Ive been a little down in the dumps because of what a person is saying about me personally. This reminded me that I shouldn't worry about it.

:hug: Glad I could help!


My mom used to tell me all the time as a child that your character is who you really are and your reputation is only what others think you are.

At the end of the day, the ONLY thing that really matters is your character.

lovethis Chin up! You are a fantastic provider!!

[Leigh]

I agree! But I think that only a portion of it is for selfish reasons.

Sometimes I think people DO need to be told that their own actions are the reasons for other people's actions....kwim?

One of the biggest rules I have here and repeat often to my daycare kids is
"If you are big enough to do it, be big enough to own it" and adults NOT owning their own actions is most of what's wrong in the world today.

Whether this mom takes to heart what you said, she still needed to hear it.

I do agree with you about people being responsible for their actions. And I did tell her that it cost me time and money to prepare for her child to attend, because I think she needs to be told that her actions affect other people, and should realize that it is HER OWN FAULT that she is constantly seeking childcare (I have seen her advertising her need repeatedly in the past few months-I would guess that there aren't many that she hasn't screwed over in this town). I still don't think it will make a difference to her, but getting it off my chest sure made my day.

As far as people badmouthing me, it wouldn't bother me. Anyone she would talk to about it would certainly already be aware of her character. I have excellent references, my childcare is full, and I have the luxury of choosing who I accept in the future. Anything she says surely would reflect on her, rather than me.

[Maria2013]

How about...

"No. U R unreliable."

::

[Leigh]

Got a text back just now denying that she ever set up care with me. I am sure she did, because she is listed in my phone directory as NO SHOW XXXXX (her name). Anyone who I have black listed gets put into my directory with the reason I don't want them here along with their name, and the details of why in the notes, so that I don't bother with them again. There are NO SHOW's (don't show for care or for interview), CRAZY MOM's, etc. This way, if my phone rings, I know who it is before answering (or NOT answering).

I was tempted to text back with these details of the dates and times that she set up AND later confirmed, but I'm past it now that I have had my say. She KNOWS that she did it, I told her my feelings, and I'm going to let it go.

[WImom]

Dear DCM

Thank you for your inquiry for child care. At this time, I am unable to accommodate your needs. This decision is based on my current openings (none at this time) and your previous requests for child care that were not used or cancelled. The number to the local child care resource and referral agency is 222-444-5555. Thank you.
(Her, NOT you )

[Angelsj]

How about...

"No. U R unreliable."

:::: Love it!!

[BABYLUVER]

Just got a text from someone who TWICE has been a no-show for drop-in care (I have never met her-she was "desperate" for drop-in care, and I was available, so twice I said yes). After the last no-show, I put her on my "black list". I have the feeling that the reason she didn't show is because I told her that payment was due at drop-off for drop-in kids (I had it happen to me ONCE that a mom picked up and told me she would pay me on Friday for care provided on Tuesday-never will happen again, that's why I now ask for $ at drop-off).

I am just in shock that this morning, she sends me a text asking me to take her 3 kids long-term. Um, no. First, I don't have the space for 3 (the drop-in was for just one). Second, I am still mad about the last no-show 2 months ago!

I am debating whether to just ignore her or tell her off. Evil me would like to set up care and then just not be home at her drop off time! What would you all tell her? I thought about just telling her that I am not willing to provide care for her because of the previous no-shows, that after 2 chances I am not willing to give a 3rd, and not to contact me again.

What would all of you say to this mom?

What I told one mom who called me every few weeks and never even showed for a SINGLE appt I'd schedule them and knew she would not show, so I never really worried about it, but finally one time, she said she was DESPERATE and needed me the next day and she'd pay me first thing drop off. Didn't want to meet or anything, just would show up an hour prior to normal time she'd be dropping off to talk to me. I said "You know, N, I don't believe that you will show up. You've made 7 appointments and of the 7 appointments you have made, you called me ONCE the first time saying you were just running 10 mins late and you NEVER showed or explained why 10 minutes late turned into being indefinitely late. THEN you told me month 2 and 3 how desperate you were, how you can't keep care, and how you kept having sitter problems. I will NOT be meeting with you and you really should keep better records on who you have called and ditched so that you do not call them over and over again looking for care you don't really need" She got quiet, said "SORRY" and hung up. Never heard from her again.

[nanglgrl]

:hug: Glad I could help!


My mom used to tell me all the time as a child that your character is who you really are and your reputation is only what others think you are.

At the end of the day, the ONLY thing that really matters is your character.

lovethis Chin up! You are a fantastic provider!!

Thank you!

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Dear DCM

Thank you for your inquiry for child care. At this time, I am unable to accommodate your needs. This decision is based on my current openings (none at this time) and your previous requests for child care that were not used or cancelled. The number to the local child care resource and referral agency is 222-444-5555. Thank you.



I would ABSOLUTELY mention her previous behavior! Not only because it's rude but because she SHOULD know that her past actions will eventually catch up to her.

We all need to cross the bridges we burn at some point in our lives. Silly woman! (Her, NOT you )

Bingo!

[sleepinghart]

Got a text back just now denying that she ever set up care with me. I am sure she did, because she is listed in my phone directory as NO SHOW XXXXX (her name). Anyone who I have black listed gets put into my directory with the reason I don't want them here along with their name, and the details of why in the notes, so that I don't bother with them again. There are NO SHOW's (don't show for care or for interview), CRAZY MOM's, etc. This way, if my phone rings, I know who it is before answering (or NOT answering).

I was tempted to text back with these details of the dates and times that she set up AND later confirmed, but I'm past it now that I have had my say. She KNOWS that she did it, I told her my feelings, and I'm going to let it go.

(Leigh quote)"Got a text back just now denying that she ever set up care with me"

"..I was tempted to text back with these details of the dates and times that she set up AND later confirmed..."(end quote)

~This is just my opinion, but if it were me, I would just about have to do just that....Text her back with the details such as dates/times/etc. ..Because number one, I don't believe she ever thought of the possibility of you keeping such records therefore giving her denial a lot more strength & power in her mind. To me, if I'd already went this far with it, I'd have a very hard time not finishing*(on my terms & in my way, that is*). ~Plus, if she's ever going to learn, as blackcat31 put it, that her actions are the reasons for other people's actions(even though it's unlikely), then a significant part of that is someone letting her know and calling her out on her BS-- That she can't just think of a quick excuse, deflect blame, and get off the hook every time. I'm curious what her version of the story is since she's denying ever setting up care- Some folks.