New Kid Touches Himself

[Unregistered]

I know it is normal for children to "find" themselves and usually redirection works well. Today we started a new little boy who was recently potty trained (but still in Pull-Ups per mom's request). All morning he's been pulling his privates up out of her pull-up and sweat pants and playing with just the tip? Or, he'll walk around with his hands inside of his knickers. It's not exactly sanitary which makes it an issue, but the bigger issue is that it makes me feel uncomfortable because it's ALL DAY LONG. Even now, we just put them down for naps and he's kicked off his little blanket and has his hands in his pull up. I don't take it as sexual, I know it's a comfort measure because so many things are changing in his life at once (plus, it feels nice) but we have 13 other kids in the class. We can't have this continue around the other children-- we've already had one parent come in to volunteer and she was very vocal about not wanting "that behavior" around her daughter. For those with experience dealing with this issue, what has proved successful? Reading, toys, redirection, engaging him in a game or activity, taking him to the bathroom... none of those are detering or lessening the behavior at all. We had the nurse check him out for a rash or something we may have missed (like an allergic reaction to the Pull-up) but everything seems OK there, too.

[Unregistered]

I wrote "her" earlier, but I meant HIM. It's been one of those days. Can you tell???

[SilverSabre25]

"That's for home, not daycare. Time to wash hands!"

Every. Single. Time.

keep an eye on him and try to catch him when the hands are heading that direction. Catch the hand in yours if you have to. "Hands out of your pants." Every. Single. Time.

it'll take awhile to break the habit, but the habit will break.

[nothingwithoutjoy]

I tell kids who do it at inappropriate times (in a nonchalant voice that does not imply judgement) "that's something to do it private" and redirect to something else. But I cut them some slack at nap time, since they're usually in child care so many hours of their life that that's practically their only private time (I try to put them in a private-ish spot and keep their blankets up).

But I'd also talk with the parents. Not that it's bad for him to be doing it, but that the constant nature of it indicates stress. I'd try to get to the root of what might be causing the stress.

Good luck. Not a fun one to address!

[Cat Herder]

What Silver said for long-term.

For short-term you can ask Mom to supply onesies and over-alls (think Carters). Once you tell her what is happening you may be surprised how willling she is to send them.

It will make potty training a bit more difficult, but this phase seems to end about as quickly as it came on.

(obviously make sure urine is clear, no foul smell, no pain upon urinating, etc... stuff you already know. )

[hope]

I would treat same as if he were a nose picker or hands in the mouth. Wash hands every single time. Say that's for potty time or no touch. Habit will b broken in week.

[Sugar Magnolia]

I had a boy that this. It was CONSTANT. It started when he.was 2 and.seemed like normal exploring. I would redirect but it would only last a few minutes. And he cried every time he was redirected. He turned 3 and it really ramped up. He was nearly 4 and it started becoming sexual in nature, you know, doing the up and down motion. One day during nap, I am reading a magazine and I hear him panting! It was totally out and he was working it feverishly. "no! You put that away and go to sleep, hands out of pants!" He complied and appeared to go to sleep. I return to my magazine. Half hour later, he is at it again, but this time he was.trying to whisper to the girl next to him.... "psst....wake up.....look at me" I put a barrier between them and called mom. We discussed it, I told her he would be termed immediately if he starts exposing himself and masturbating. Yes, "masturbating", not exploring at this point. The next day she brings in some literature about how exploring is normal in 2 year olds and suggested I was blowing it out of proportion. I pointed out her son is almost four and this literature was labeled "Toddlers". Sure enough, he exposed himself on the playground to the same girl! I called mom to come get him. She had the nerve to say "but my son is NOT SEXUALLY ABUSING her, so can he please stay enrolled?" No. Bye bye. Btw, this child had severe ADHD and mom also tried to say his "disease" was causing his masturbation issue.

I would term, seriously.

[butterfly]

Do you think it's a cleanliness issue? I have a little girl that touches herself, but it's only when she hasn't been bathed in a few days. I have to remind the parents that it's bathtime tonight since Sally has been "itching" in her pants all day.

If it's something else, I haven't had much experience... sorry. :hug:

[Angelmichelle]

I'm logged in now, but that's OK since we talked with mom about the issue. Baby boy had orchiopexy for an undescended testicle some months back. While healing, when healing, after healing... well, at some point in the healing process he began to massage himself because mom and dad was putting a salve on him with each diaper change. Mom is fairly certain he will stop the behavior because he did it before in the past and stopped suddenly. So, we're hoping for the same thing. In the meantime, I'll take your advice about the washing the hands, constant reminders, and catching him before he detours. Days like this I miss having my own program but then again, I look at the difference we make in the kids' lives and I think it's worth it.

[Childminder]

What do you do if a child is always putting his hands in his mouth or nose? I do the same for the child who plays with their privates. At this age it is just another body part.

[Angelmichelle]

What do you do if a child is always putting his hands in his mouth or nose? I do the same for the child who plays with their privates. At this age it is just another body part.

With the ones with runny noses or who dig we remind them to take their fingers out and we wash their hands. Normally, we have a stretch of time before it has to be addressed again. With our one thumb-****er, we allow her to **** her thumb because mom just died and she is living in foster care... her thumb ****ing is a small thing we're not going to take away from her just yet. Even with our other children who have touched themselves, redirection normally works. What I am saying is that redirection DOES NOT work for him. We can tell him that's just for home, wash his hands, and before we leave the sinks he's back at it if we're not quick enough. Seriously, it's non-stop. If it wasn't a real issue and a bit more constant than I'm used to seeing, I wouldn't be asking for advice.

[spinnymarie]

Huh, sounds like a real issue - I'd definitly look for some sort of barrier, a belt or something. Pants he can't undo himself, maybe. ANY barrier, just for a few days, and hopefully the few days will get him out of the habit.

[Cradle2crayons]

With the ones with runny noses or who dig we remind them to take their fingers out and we wash their hands. Normally, we have a stretch of time before it has to be addressed again. With our one thumb-****er, we allow her to **** her thumb because mom just died and she is living in foster care... her thumb ****ing is a small thing we're not going to take away from her just yet. Even with our other children who have touched themselves, redirection normally works. What I am saying is that redirection DOES NOT work for him. We can tell him that's just for home, wash his hands, and before we leave the sinks he's back at it if we're not quick enough. Seriously, it's non-stop. If it wasn't a real issue and a bit more constant than I'm used to seeing, I wouldn't be asking for advice.

I'm lost, is he too old to out into a snug diaper and a onesie for a few days?? I had a problem once with a child who constantly took off his shorts and undies. He was four. So I took a t shirt and a pair of long shorts and I sewed them together. Then in the back of the t shirt I snipped it and out Velcro to get the child in and out. Worked perfect.

Usually, that habit can be broken pretty quickly if yu can consistently stop it.

I think I read he'd had a medical issue. Are we sure it doesn't bother him. Like scar tissue! I've had lots of surgeries and I get twinges in all kinds of places. Maybe he's getting twinges too and doesn't know how else to address them or even explain them??