How should I handle this?

[MCC]

I have posted before that I have 2 families holding a spot, the Moms are sisters. They will both be 3 months old when they start, one Oct 1, and one Nov. 1.

I have already had issues with them getting their hold payments in on time (both families) and now I am having another issue. I'm sorry if this is long, but it does need some explanation.

I do not need the infants, I have two 2 year olds using those spots right now, and they both want to have the spot long term.

I have to hire an assistant in order to have the infants here, as it pushes me over my numbers. The original agreement was that Oct 1 baby would be here MWF, from 8:30-4:30, but b/c I do not offer a part time rate, it would be full rate. ( it sounded like a pretty good deal, and I needed to fill the spots)

DCM of Oct 1 baby just emailed that she will now need M-F 7:30-5:30 I only have one other client that maxes out my hours, and it's only once a week. Also- I will have to have my assistant here M-F, and will literally be paying her the baby's full tuition.

Also- She asked me about my hiring process for my assistant, making sure she is over 18, CPR cert, background check, and what experience she has with infants. I'm a little offended that she needs to ask any of this, as she should have confidence that I am hiring an individual who is competent and meets all licensing requirements.

My question is, How do I get out of this? I either need to charge them $50 more a week, or just get rid of them.

They have been paying to hold the spot at half rate, my contract says it is nonrefundable. If I term, based on the change of hours, should I refund their money? And then what to do about the sister?

After I filled these spots with infants, a daycare around the corner closed, and I took the 2 year olds on a temp basis, so that is what's going on with that.

Thanks in advance for any advice you have! Mom of Oct 1 baby is calling me at 1 to discuss.

[momofboys]

I have posted before that I have 2 families holding a spot, the Moms are sisters. They will both be 3 months old when they start, one Oct 1, and one Nov. 1.

I have already had issues with them getting their hold payments in on time (both families) and now I am having another issue. I'm sorry if this is long, but it does need some explanation.

I do not need the infants, I have two 2 year olds using those spots right now, and they both want to have the spot long term.

I have to hire an assistant in order to have the infants here, as it pushes me over my numbers. The original agreement was that Oct 1 baby would be here MWF, from 8:30-4:30, but b/c I do not offer a part time rate, it would be full rate. ( it sounded like a pretty good deal, and I needed to fill the spots). If she is not able/willing to pay more IMO you have a right to part ways & since your deposits are non-refundable no $$$ should go back to her. She changed the arrangement, I wouldn't feel bad about rescinding things with her. Of course I'd be concerned the other mom would not come now. I probably am not much help !

DCM of Oct 1 baby just emailed that she will now need M-F 7:30-5:30 I only have one other client that maxes out my hours, and it's only once a week. Also- I will have to have my assistant here M-F, and will literally be paying her the baby's full tuition.

Also- She asked me about my hiring process for my assistant, making sure she is over 18, CPR cert, background check, and what experience she has with infants. I'm a little offended that she needs to ask any of this, as she should have confidence that I am hiring an individual who is competent and meets all licensing requirements.

My question is, How do I get out of this? I either need to charge them $50 more a week, or just get rid of them.

They have been paying to hold the spot at half rate, my contract says it is nonrefundable. If I term, based on the change of hours, should I refund their money? And then what to do about the sister?

After I filled these spots with infants, a daycare around the corner closed, and I took the 2 year olds on a temp basis, so that is what's going on with that.

Thanks in advance for any advice you have! Mom of Oct 1 baby is calling me at 1 to discuss.

IMO the mom who is changing the hours is voiding her contract because your original agreement was only for care on MWF. When you talk to her I would tell her that & let her know child can still come (if you want him to or are able to have him come) but you have to re-do the contract & the weekly fee will now be higher.

[MamaBearCanada]

Don't term... If you don't want to take them tell them that you are unable to accommodate the change in hours but that their original spot is being held until they inform you otherwise. Then wait for them to term. If they term no refund.

If you do want to take them make sure you include the additional backpay for 1/2 of the new fees. Also add a late fee to any late installments or a rule that x late pays voids the contract. Make sure the new fees reflect having an assistant. They may decide it's too much & term. Again no refund if they term.

As for the questions about the assistant don't take it personally just reassure her. It probably makes her feel like a better mom for being on top of things especially if she doesn't really want to go to work and leave her child.

Their problems shouldn't become your problems. Hugs.

[MyAngels]

It sounds to me like this family is just not going to be a good fit for you. I would not start care at all. As to whether you refund their money, that's up to you, but I would. I just couldn't, in good conscience, keep it, especially since you already have had those spots filled with full-time kids while holding them.

I feel sorry for the mom though. Around here it would be very tough to find good infant care on such short notice.

[Familycare71]

I agree with PP. you can say: the new hours you requested do not work for me. If she doesn't have the ability to change back to her "contracted" rate then she termed herself and you get to keep the $. If she can still do original hours the if you term I do feel like you should refund.
As for the sister/other dcm - if I'm correct - didnt they want their babies at the same dc? So are you ok/willing to lose her too? Chances are either way the if the other dcm doesn't continue neither will she and then you get to keep that $because she termed herself

[lovemylife]

I would let her know that due to the hour changes the rate will increase by $x. Personally if she terms I wouldn't feel good about keeping the money. I would return it. The last time you posted you said the sisters want their kids at the same daycare so you would loose both correct?

[Willow]

Don't term... If you don't want to take them tell them that you are unable to accommodate the change in hours but that their original spot is being held until they inform you otherwise. Then wait for them to term. If they term no refund.

If you do want to take them make sure you include the additional backpay for 1/2 of the new fees. Also add a late fee to any late installments or a rule that x late pays voids the contract. Make sure the new fees reflect having an assistant. They may decide it's too much & term. Again no refund if they term.

As for the questions about the assistant don't take it personally just reassure her. It probably makes her feel like a better mom for being on top of things especially if she doesn't really want to go to work and leave her child.

Their problems shouldn't become your problems. Hugs.

Don't term, just let her know that you can accommodate the original agreement. If she wants to alter that original agreement you're going to have to draw up a new contract and it's going to be xx amount more each week.

I would never be offended if a parent questioned the safety protocol in place for screening providers, assistants and other staff. As a parent I don't really care if someone is claiming to be Mother Theresa herself, I want them background checked *AND* you can sure bet I'm going to dig into their life and demand references. Frankly, I have no clue why more parents don't ask about it. They're leaving their child with a complete stranger, and are simply trusting the word of what could be a fabricated piece of paper (license). That would never be good enough for me anyway.

[Familycare71]

I would let her know that due to the hour changes the rate will increase by $x. Personally if she terms I wouldn't feel good about keeping the money. I would return it. The last time you posted you said the sisters want their kids at the same daycare so you would loose both correct?

I really wouldn't feel guilty just because she changed the times- if you termed because you wanted to based on changing your mind- then yes refund. But if your just not able/willing to make the change she requested- that IMO is on her.

[Blackcat31]

I have posted before that I have 2 families holding a spot, the Moms are sisters. They will both be 3 months old when they start, one Oct 1, and one Nov. 1.

I have already had issues with them getting their hold payments in on time (both families) and now I am having another issue. I'm sorry if this is long, but it does need some explanation.

I do not need the infants, I have two 2 year olds using those spots right now, and they both want to have the spot long term.

I have to hire an assistant in order to have the infants here, as it pushes me over my numbers. The original agreement was that Oct 1 baby would be here MWF, from 8:30-4:30, but b/c I do not offer a part time rate, it would be full rate. ( it sounded like a pretty good deal, and I needed to fill the spots)

DCM of Oct 1 baby just emailed that she will now need M-F 7:30-5:30 I only have one other client that maxes out my hours, and it's only once a week. Also- I will have to have my assistant here M-F, and will literally be paying her the baby's full tuition.

Also- She asked me about my hiring process for my assistant, making sure she is over 18, CPR cert, background check, and what experience she has with infants. I'm a little offended that she needs to ask any of this, as she should have confidence that I am hiring an individual who is competent and meets all licensing requirements.

My question is, How do I get out of this? I either need to charge them $50 more a week, or just get rid of them.

They have been paying to hold the spot at half rate, my contract says it is nonrefundable. If I term, based on the change of hours, should I refund their money? And then what to do about the sister?

After I filled these spots with infants, a daycare around the corner closed, and I took the 2 year olds on a temp basis, so that is what's going on with that.

Thanks in advance for any advice you have! Mom of Oct 1 baby is calling me at 1 to discuss.

I would definitely e-mail the mom back that wants M-F now and let her know that you cannot accommodate the FULL week schedule (unless you want to) so that leaves the change in her hands. She needs to figure out what she has to do for care. If she decides to use the M,W,F space as originally agreed to, then it's all good but if she can't and really does need the full 5 days, then she will maybe term herself and then you won't owe her anything.


Truth be told if I were in your shoes and I didn't need to enroll infants because I had 2 two-year olds filling the space and wanting to stay permanently, I would term those two babies in a heartbeat and refund their money. But that's me....I much prefer older kids verses babies.

Either way if you decide to keep them, (or one of them) just make sure you don't take them if it is going to cost you money or if you are just breaking even.....there is really no point in doing that.

If you decide to term, then refund them
If they term, there is no refund
ONLY change baby #1 from M,W,F to M-F IF you really really want to.

[momofsix]

I have posted before that I have 2 families holding a spot, the Moms are sisters. They will both be 3 months old when they start, one Oct 1, and one Nov. 1.

I have already had issues with them getting their hold payments in on time (both families) and now I am having another issue. I'm sorry if this is long, but it does need some explanation.

I do not need the infants, I have two 2 year olds using those spots right now, and they both want to have the spot long term.

I have to hire an assistant in order to have the infants here, as it pushes me over my numbers. The original agreement was that Oct 1 baby would be here MWF, from 8:30-4:30, but b/c I do not offer a part time rate, it would be full rate. ( it sounded like a pretty good deal, and I needed to fill the spots)

DCM of Oct 1 baby just emailed that she will now need M-F 7:30-5:30 I only have one other client that maxes out my hours, and it's only once a week. Also- I will have to have my assistant here M-F, and will literally be paying her the baby's full tuition.


Thanks in advance for any advice you have! Mom of Oct 1 baby is calling me at 1 to discuss.

My answer would depend no how you handled the bolded part above. If, when you told her she needed to pay ft rates it was with the understanding that those hours would be available to her-then she technically is within her rights to use them. If she was told the ft price was for the pt hours then I wouldn't allow it.

I wouldn't worry about the questions about the assistant. Just as they interview us, I would expect them to make sure the assistant is qualified too.

[lovemylife]

I really wouldn't feel guilty just because she changed the times- if you termed because you wanted to based on changing your mind- then yes refund. But if your just not able/willing to make the change she requested- that IMO is on her.

I can see why others say don't refund the money. Because it is a deposit and holding the spot. It sounds like a huge chunk of change. I personally just wouldn't feel right about keeping it if the child wouldn't be coming. If it was a smaller amount of money like a few weeks then I wouldn't feel bad about it. Again it's just me

[Familycare71]

My answer would depend no how you handled the bolded part above. If, when you told her she needed to pay ft rates it was with the understanding that those hours would be available to her-then she technically is within her rights to use them. If she was told the ft price was for the pt hours then I wouldn't allow it.

I wouldn't worry about the questions about the assistant. Just as they interview us, I would expect them to make sure the assistant is qualified too.

^^^ really good point! If she knew she was paying for a full time rate/space but was just choosing not to use it then I would say if you choose not to accommodate the change you would need to refund... And for me- because I knew the other family chose you based on the fact that the cousins could both come I would most likely refund the other family too if they pulled- just because I would be changing what I promised.
If the mom changing the schedule saw the fee as a part time fee- then my original statements stand

[MCC]

Wow, thank you for all this GREAT advice!

Blackcat- I do not REALLY want these kids, I'm really dreading it actually, I love the kids I have now, and I love that they are all older and we can get out of the house all the time. I just feel really bad about making this commitment, and then backing out, even if I refund their money, I still feel bad.

As far as the sister backing out if Oct 1 mom terms, that is fine by me.

In regards to them being entitled to the FT spot, we never talked about it, since from day one, the agreement was MWF, at the full time rate. I took on the infant based on the fact that 6 hours a day, 3 days a week, sounded like an easy deal. I sent them an email 2 weeks ago asking to confirm hours and days so I could hire the assistant, and that is what we once again agreed upon. I also would have to hire a separate assistant, as my current one is only available MWF, so that means more interviewing searching, paying for job postings on care.com etc.

This is becoming a mess. I feel like telling her that I can't accommodate the new hours sounds like the best way to go about it. Not to mention, I am going to M-Th care starting Jan. and they KNOW this, so I'm not sure why she is even asking/requesting M-F care.

[Familycare71]

Wow, thank you for all this GREAT advice!

Blackcat- I do not REALLY want these kids, I'm really dreading it actually, I love the kids I have now, and I love that they are all older and we can get out of the house all the time. I just feel really bad about making this commitment, and then backing out, even if I refund their money, I still feel bad.

As far as the sister backing out if Oct 1 mom terms, that is fine by me.

In regards to them being entitled to the FT spot, we never talked about it, since from day one, the agreement was MWF, at the full time rate. I took on the infant based on the fact that 6 hours a day, 3 days a week, sounded like an easy deal. I sent them an email 2 weeks ago asking to confirm hours and days so I could hire the assistant, and that is what we once again agreed upon. I also would have to hire a separate assistant, as my current one is only available MWF, so that means more interviewing searching, paying for job postings on care.com etc.

This is becoming a mess. I feel like telling her that I can't accommodate the new hours sounds like the best way to go about it. Not to mention, I am going to M-Th care starting Jan. and they KNOW this, so I'm not sure why she is even asking/requesting M-F care.

Then IMO . Let her know it doesn't work- and I think- you have every right to keep the money from both families! . That is assuming the sister terms-

[MCC]

I can see why others say don't refund the money. Because it is a deposit and holding the spot. It sounds like a huge chunk of change. I personally just wouldn't feel right about keeping it if the child wouldn't be coming. If it was a smaller amount of money like a few weeks then I wouldn't feel bad about it. Again it's just me

They have given me $875 in hold fees, and a $500 deposit, that becomes their first 2 week payment.

The other family is paying FULL rate for the spot b/c I already had the 2 year olds wanting the full time spot, and I told them I would not hold the spot, b/c they desperately want their kids in the same place, they agreed to pay full rate for the spot. They have given me $2000. So I would be refunding $3375.

I would be paying the assistant $3000 before the end of the year, so really I would level out by refunding them and NOT hiring the assistant.