Preschool Pressure

[Shell]

I did a search on here, and saw that this topic has come up before, but it seems it has been a little while.

Now that school has started around here, I'm noticing a lot of parents posting pictures one facebook of their little ones on their first day of preschool. I am noticing a trend that these kids are getting younger and younger. One post today was of a 2 year old attending his first day.

My own mom kept my brother and I home until we were 4, and I think we turned out ok Also, I am a former Preschool and Kindergarten teacher, and I am quite familiar with state frameworks and benchmarks for this age group.

Now that ds is 3, I am getting a lot of pressure from outsiders, including a neighbor, that frown when I say I plan on keeping ds home for at least another year. I really feel like this is what I want to do, but it's so common where I am from to have your child enrolled in full day school from infancy on

Did any of you stay home with your children until they were older? Would you mind sharing any pros/cons of keeping them out of formal preschool?

[Unregistered]

None of my children went to "formal" preschool. We did preschool here. One of my kiddos didn't even go to school till they were six because of the way their birthday fell and the others were 5.5 years old before going to anytype of school. These kiddos get so little time with the parents and I'm not understanding the mindset of pushing them out earlier and earlier. You can even pick the day your child is born which blows me away. Everything anymore is about convenience!

[cheerfuldom]

so you have a daycare and you have a lot of experience teaching which I am sure you bring into your daycare schedule.....and your child is supposedly missing out on something? whatever. he is getting the best of both worlds at home IMO. screw all the naysayers and do what is right for your family. the preschools at 2 and 3 are almost always glorified daycare. some learning and circle time mixed in but generally, a good portion of the day, if not all the day, is exactly what you do in your home anyway.

[LoraJenkins]

My children never went to preschool. Both of my sons were almost 6 before they started kindergarten and my daughters were early 5s. They never left my side before that day unless I was literally in the hospital. Oh, I got the "your child is NOT going to adjust to school" and "you child will experience extreme separation anxiety". Guess what? All of my children adjusted just fine and we had NO meltdowns!

As far as pros/cons for keeping them home with me....I can not think of any cons! The Pros: I loved every moment I had with them, they were very well adjusted children with plenty of confidence, I was able to ready them for kindy myself, and so much more! I could never think of doing it any other way!

[snbauser]

My oldest went to preschool but only because dh and I both worked ft outside of the home. My middle went to preschool because he needed to receive therapies. My youngest went for the 6 months before he started Kindy but only because he was such a momma's boy that I couldn't go ANYWHERE without him or he would cry the entire time I was gone. So I knew we needed to work that out before he started Kindy. If it wasn't for that, I probably wouldn't have sent him at all since I was working on preschool stuff daily in my program.

[Maria2013]

so you have a daycare and you have a lot of experience teaching which I am sure you bring into your daycare schedule.....and your child is supposedly missing out on something? whatever. he is getting the best of both worlds at home IMO. screw all the naysayers and do what is right for your family. the preschools at 2 and 3 are almost always glorified daycare. some learning and circle time mixed in but generally, a good portion of the day, if not all the day, is exactly what you do in your home anyway.

[NeedaVaca]

so you have a daycare and you have a lot of experience teaching which I am sure you bring into your daycare schedule.....and your child is supposedly missing out on something? whatever. he is getting the best of both worlds at home IMO. screw all the naysayers and do what is right for your family. the preschools at 2 and 3 are almost always glorified daycare. some learning and circle time mixed in but generally, a good portion of the day, if not all the day, is exactly what you do in your home anyway.

Exactly! I wanted my kids with me for as long as I could, why on earth would I send them away so young when they learn even more when they are with me? They had plenty of play dates and kids to play with, there is simply no reason to send kids to school this young! It's just because these parents have to work (or have time to themselves) and it sounds better to say they are in preschool than daycare...

Bottom line for me: I kept them home because I love them and they grow up so fast, I would never want to miss it!

[Crazy In Mo]

I stayed home with my son until he was 4. I don't regret a single thing about it that time can never be replaced:hug:

[JoseyJo]

I never went to preschool or daycare. My mom was a SAHM and she says I was so far ahead in K I was bored and got in trouble

[snbauser]

It's just because these parents have to work (or have time to themselves) and it sounds better to say they are in preschool than daycare...

This!

[Leigh]

Unless I felt that preschool were offering something that my child absolutely could not get at home (that was also necessary), I would not send a child younger than 4 to preschool, either. At age 3, kids have lots to learn about life, and I believe it's healthier to let them be kids for as long as possible. Don't let people put pressure on you, only YOU know what's best for your own family.

[Jack Sprat]

Our DD just started what we call Kinder-prep this school year. She is 4.5 and will turn 5 in Dec. Best choice we ever made was to keep her home till this year. She is socially very advanced and is progressing nicely in academics. I think there is too much pressure put upon these little people to preform. I know the standards and what Common Core is wanting her to know by the time she is in KDG and more then likely she will know it. If not then she will get there. People would frown at me when I told them she wouldn't be going to pre-school and usually go on a little about being behind. My response was that she would be right where she needed to be when she needed to be there. And if not it will all work out.

[slorey]

I did not send my kids to preschool. My oldest (now 10) was enrolled in a group family child care because I was teaching full time. I started doing home daycare when he started kg. My middle (now 7) was home with me and the daycare. I am still deciding what to do with my youngest (age 2.5) but if I send him to preschool it wouldn't be until he was 4 and only if I thought he needed it socially (right now he's a mommas boy and doesn't tolerate being away from me for very long). My older kids are both at the top of their class academically and also are very socially adjusted. In my opinion, the kids need time with you more and as long as you provide them with a strong foundation, they will be fine without attending formal preschool.

[Blackcat31]

Head Start doesn't think there are any long term benefits from structured preschool education.....

They did their own study and found out that even their programs had no lasting impact beyond grade 3.

[spinnymarie]

I am a former K teacher - there *can* be a big difference at the start of K between kids who went to preschool and kids who did not. HOWEVER

My DD attended 2 days/wk of preschool last year and this year is staying home - we are doing 'homeschool' preschool, and next year she will go to K.
IMO the only downside to NOT attending is I think its hard for *some* kids to get used to taking directions from someone outside their family. And, unfortunately, it's hard to know which kids these are until they've been in a school-setting.

So as long as you are teaching the skills at home, and there are plenty of opportunities for your LO to be independent in a setting where directions are given from someone outside his family (including grandmas and grandpas) I think there really is no huge benefit to preschool.

Since I started home dc, it's likely that DS won't go to any, and if any very little, preschool, just like DD. We will put him in a few other activities with coaches and other kids or teachers and other kids, and continue to do the work at home, and I'm sure he will be just fine. If we were having an issue with him listening or something at one of these activities, I might reconsider and have him attend more preschool.