SA Complaining About The Meals

[DanceMom]

I have a SA girl that comes in for breakfast and says some snotty comments about it. She will say " Oh, Again" or " Oh, ick "

I offer a huge variety - I send home a monthly menu - and I always make the toddlers favorites. (Today was toast, cereal and banana )

Today I told her she is more than welcome to bring her own breakfast and her own after school snack. It is very frustrating to me to have someone (esp) a kid that I am bending over backwards to feed and she complains.

Would you let the parent know also or just have dealt with it one on one with her?

[BentleysBands]

ditto here...i talked w/the parents and they told my SA girl the same as i have....eat or starve LOL

would u mind sharing your menu?

[Former Teacher]

I would do both actually. I would have said the same thing to her as you did. "well Jane, if you don't like what I am serving today, please bring your own tomorrow" etc etc. Whenever I had a PITA kid that was a very picky eater, I would just tell them that the center was not a restaurant. If they weren't going to eat then, they wouldn't eat until the next time and so forth. Depending on the age (esp for an afterschooler!), I would tell them, and you know your parents don't get you until really late so you are going to be one starving boy/girl! Nine times out of ten, they would eat.

I would also inform and remind the parents about your menus. Do you have them posted? I would tell the parents..."Jane isn't really eating in the morning. Perhaps she would like to bring her own food. Here is the menu so she can decide on what days she wants to bring her own "

P.S...I wouldn't bend over backwards for her anymore. She is probably one of THOSE kids who, when she doesn't eat, the parent probably makes whatever she wants. Stick to your menu and what the other kiddos like. You are not a short order cook ::

[DanceMom]

BentleysBands - My entire menu ? Or just what was for today ?

Thanks for the advice. I do send home the menu at the beginning of each month...so they have it to reference at home..which Im sure with THIS family...it goes in the garbage or is lost before they even make it home that day

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

I struggle with this same thing with a 9 year old daycare girl. She doesn't seem to like a thing I make, it's so frustrating! When she is here for lunch (summers and school days off) all she wants is peanut butter/jelly, because that is what I tell the kids they will get if they don't like my main meal. It is EVERY single day with her...I had her write a list of lunch foods she does like and even if I make some of those things on her list, she STILL won't eat it, saying she doesn't like the way "I" make it. It is those days that I wish I didn't have that alternate choice of a PB&J....some days I don't want to be bothered by making something separate.

I know I should just do one choice and like it or leave it, but there are some things my kids won't eat...however it's not as excessive as this daycare girl.

[Former Teacher]

My former director served PB and J when the child wouldn't eat the main meal. It got to point one day when there were SEVERAL children who wanted the sandwich instead of frito pie (will never forget that day! )

IMHO: As hard as it is, and as cruel as it is, you need to take it out on the child for the parents irresponablity. If the parent can't take the time to read the menu to see if their child will eat, oh well.

We once had a child (4 years old) who HATED our tuna noodle casserole. Of course mom never looked at the menu. I verbally told her, please bring John's lunch tomorrow since we are having tuna noodle casserole and he won't eat it. Sure said mom. Did she? Nope. I even told her that morning. What did she say? Oh I have a short day, I will pick him up early to feed him then. What time did she pick him up? 5:30 regular time. Where did she work? FROM HOME. It got to a point where I even stopped reminding her because it wasn't my place.

This is a big vent of mine. If a parent can't take responsibility (no matter how minor it is) for their child, why have them? My dh and I are thinking about adopting since I can't give birth. A friend of mine's daughter who just turned 16 is pregnant. We offered to adopt this baby. No, she wants to keep it. It's like why? We are going to pay to support it anyway, if you know what I mean.

Sorry to get off topic...again. But thanks for the vent

[MyAngels]

When I get these types of comments I always say, with a nice smile, "I'm so sorry that you don't like what I've made, but you know, at my house, you never have to eat." It's amazing what a growling tummy will do to widen the tastes of a picky eater. And, honestly, between breakfast, morning snack, lunch and afternoon snack, they have plenty of opportunities to eat during the day.

[Lucy]

I don't give them the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of me. I ignore it the first few times, then when it gets on my nerves, I give them the stink eye and simply and quietly say "that's enough".

I serve it, my job is done. It's their choice to eat it or not. They will never get hollered at for not finishing food. (I'm talking about SA'ers here, not the little ones.) That's usually enough to put an end to it, and it didn't make a scene. I don't play the games, and they know it.

[MARSTELAC]

I have learned that I am not a short order cook (thank to my food monitor) and what I serve is what they get. My rule is "take a bite, be polite"...they need to try one bite of each thing then they may be excused. They won't starve. I had some parents bring hot dogs for any meal or snack their child won't eat but I refuse to serve them. Another parent told me to offer their child PBJ but I said no. I send home a menu each week for the next week. If they don't like it, too bad. Plus, I refuse to allow food from home. I will work with special diets due to medical reasons but that's it.

[laundryduchess@yahoo.com]

I agree, they eat bfast at home, and 2 snacks and lunch with me,... they wont starve being picky at one of them. either they eat or not,.. I offer it, give them time to eat it, and let them up from the table.

[AfterSchoolMom]

I usually have at least one SA every year that is picky and won't eat half of what they're served. I just tell them that they don't have to eat it, but that they're not allowed to make comments about it, because that's rude.

I also don't do the short order thing - everyone gets the same thing, and if they don't want it, oh well - either the other kids share that portion, or I save it for another time (if it hasn't been touched/tasted, of course...haha).