Another Kid That Does Not Know How to Play

[cheerfuldom]

This just really baffles me but I keep seeing this over and over with new daycare kids....kids as old as 4!

My newest daycare child is 15 months, been here 3 weeks. She has not picked up a single toy in 3 weeks. This is not an exaggeration. Here is the list of what she is willing to do:

*wants to go outside if we are inside and wants to go inside if we are outside
*wants to get in the highchair if its not mealtime, and out when it is mealtime
*open doors or drawers, pushes chairs around
*sits in a chair alone when its play time
*stands in the same spot outside when its outside time

Occasionally she does cry and holler if I walk away from her but for the most part, she isnt upset. She just doesnt have any play skills. She has a couple words, mama and bye bye but it doesnt seem like she knows when to use those words, she just randomly hollers out so there doesnt seem to be much effort at communicating, just making noise. I have a fantastic playroom and backyard if I say so myself and I dont understand how a kid her age wouldnt get curious and pick up some toy! weird. And this is coming from a child that has two siblings and has been in daycare since birth.

[Play Care]

This just really baffles me but I keep seeing this over and over with new daycare kids....kids as old as 4!

My newest daycare child is 15 months, been here 3 weeks. She has not picked up a single toy in 3 weeks. This is not an exaggeration. Here is the list of what she is willing to do:

*wants to go outside if we are inside and wants to go inside if we are outside
*wants to get in the highchair if its not mealtime, and out when it is mealtime
*open doors or drawers, pushes chairs around
*sits in a chair alone when its play time
*stands in the same spot outside when its outside time

Occasionally she does cry and holler if I walk away from her but for the most part, she isnt upset. She just doesnt have any play skills. She has a couple words, mama and bye bye but it doesnt seem like she knows when to use those words, she just randomly hollers out so there doesnt seem to be much effort at communicating, just making noise. I have a fantastic playroom and backyard if I say so myself and I dont understand how a kid her age wouldnt get curious and pick up some toy! weird. And this is coming from a child that has two siblings and has been in daycare since birth.

That actually sounds totally normal for her age and the fact she is new to your program :confused:

[Heidi]

2 older sibs and 1 or 2 parents at home = she is probably always entertained by someone.

" Older sib 1, play with the baby so I can make dinner"

"Older sib 2, play with the baby so I can take a shower"

"Honey, take the baby in the livingroom while I help sib 1 and 2 with homework".

"baby made a noise! Someone figure it out and help her before she starts to make more of them"

::::

[countrymom]

or I've seen kids when they are infants just sit in a chair infront of the tv all day. See if thats what she does. I wonder if the tv is the entertainer.

I'm surprised she doesn't do anything. The 15month old I have loves to investigate everything and I mean everything !

[cheerfuldom]

That actually sounds totally normal for her age and the fact she is new to your program :confused:

I dont think its normal at all. The toddlers and babies in my care have always been so curious and playful. They WANT to do things and figure things out and get into a little trouble in the process.

but I have run into a few kids lately that are older and just have no interest in the toys here. I will say, I dont have battery operated items in the playroom and I think that is a major part of the confusion for them.

[cheerfuldom]

2 older sibs and 1 or 2 parents at home = she is probably always entertained by someone.

" Older sib 1, play with the baby so I can make dinner"

"Older sib 2, play with the baby so I can take a shower"

"Honey, take the baby in the livingroom while I help sib 1 and 2 with homework".

"baby made a noise! Someone figure it out and help her before she starts to make more of them"

::::

thats what I was thinking but she doesnt want to be held or read to. The older kids try and get her engaged in something and make friends and she stares at them like she has no idea what they are talking about. They hand her a toy and she will not touch it. I am really curious what she does at home....

[cheerfuldom]

or I've seen kids when they are infants just sit in a chair infront of the tv all day. See if thats what she does. I wonder if the tv is the entertainer.

I'm surprised she doesn't do anything. The 15month old I have loves to investigate everything and I mean everything !

We do watch minimal TV which she has no interest in. Isnt that weird? No on toys, TV, other kids.....I dont know what will interest her!

[Play Care]

I dont think its normal at all. The toddlers and babies in my care have always been so curious and playful. They WANT to do things and figure things out and get into a little trouble in the process.

but I have run into a few kids lately that are older and just have no interest in the toys here. I will say, I dont have battery operated items in the playroom and I think that is a major part of the confusion for them.

I agree the ones I've had since infants, yes. And children I've had for a while, yes. But newbies, especially under 2's? I find they are pretty timid the first few weeks - month. Even with prior dc experience they need to learn the new rules and routine (and let's face it, we know not all day cares are created equal - sometimes there is a lot of "unteaching"...). Some are slower to get it then others.

I do agree that kids seem to come expecting to be amused and entertained by me - though I quickly nip that in the bud. I had a 4 yo come last year and think I should play with him (and him alone ) Now *that* I find troublesome.

[Candy]

I have not had a toddler that didn't know how to play. But my step son is 10 and still doesn't know how to play. All the other boys wanted to go outside and play basketball but he just sits there in front of the tv. I took them to the sprayground and he would not play with the other boys, he just sits there in the water. To much tv at a young age is bad!

[countrymom]

does she maybe get in trouble alot at home. maybe she is afraid to touch the toys. Thats just weird. I wonder if you were to physically make her hold a toy what would she do.

[cheerfuldom]

okay so crazy update

today she actually touched toys! just wandered around the room touching things. didnt play with anything but did finally touch stuff.

[Jewels]

I will say it doesn't always mean they watch tv all day at home, or are always entertained, my own son, has rarely ever played with toys, and half the time doesn't know what to do with himself if there isn't another older boy for him to play with, he is 6, and literally has never had much of an interest in toys, hes perfectly healthy and happy, and he has a great imagination, and he will walk around for a good hour most days playing his "robot" game walking around the house getting and dodging robots, I think he does have an interest in some toys, but wont play because he doesn't want to clean them up, he obviously likes TV and video games, but only gets a very limited amount. But on days when there is not another older boy to play with, he just walks around lost. And I've never entertained him.

[Play Care]

okay so crazy update

today she actually touched toys! just wandered around the room touching things. didnt play with anything but did finally touch stuff.

Sounds as if she may be starting to get comfortable!happyface

[Josiegirl]

Does she seem to make facial contact or let you know if she wants anything? I get that new kids can feel overwhelmed, shy, like a fish out of water, but usually a toddler will be naturally curious, eager to touch, throw, mouth, babble. I don't think I've met a toddler yet, who didn't almost dive right in. In my 30 years of experience, I can only remember 1 little girl who started as a toddler, and she would cry at the window when Mommy left but a couple hours into the day, she was fine and joining us in everything, especially if I took a step back and let curiosity along with being among the other kids there work it's magic.
Hopefully she's simply slow to warm up and will feel comfortable soon. And wow, if she's been allowed to watch enough TV to turn her into a little zombie, that would be really sad.

[cheerfuldom]

Does she seem to make facial contact or let you know if she wants anything? I get that new kids can feel overwhelmed, shy, like a fish out of water, but usually a toddler will be naturally curious, eager to touch, throw, mouth, babble. I don't think I've met a toddler yet, who didn't almost dive right in. In my 30 years of experience, I can only remember 1 little girl who started as a toddler, and she would cry at the window when Mommy left but a couple hours into the day, she was fine and joining us in everything, especially if I took a step back and let curiosity along with being among the other kids there work it's magic.
Hopefully she's simply slow to warm up and will feel comfortable soon. And wow, if she's been allowed to watch enough TV to turn her into a little zombie, that would be really sad.

she doesnt communicate outside of just hollering for stuff. I am not getting a vibe like she is a special needs child. I am not an expert but I do have a special needs daughter and have cared for special needs kids so I have familiarity with some warning signs and red flags to look for. She just doesnt seem to have any social skills at all. I realize she is very young but even my two 9 month olds will play or point at things or pull on my shirt to get attention and communicate in a baby way. Someone else used the phrase "primitive behaviors" in another post and that is what I am seeing. She seems bright but no focus or way to apply anything, yet.