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She is almost 11m now, she started at 7m and she has always needed to be held to sleep but it has turned slowly into holding her down. She has nap at 10a and 3p. You can tell she is tired and as soon as you pick her up to get her to sleep she starts screaming and flailing her arms and legs (if she is not tired and it is not nap time she loves being held). You literally have to hold her tightly against you and within minutes she conks out but it just seems kinda....... i dont know the exact word for it but somewhere along the lines of cruel. I just worry that this is damaging her in the long run to be held down. I know I would not like to be held down for any reason.....but on the other hand she does fall straight to sleep so does she just NEED to be held down? Her mom does it at home too, and he knows that I do it here because she is the one that told me that is how she gets her to sleep. Patting her back doesnt work, it just keeps her up, I try to rub her face and head while I put her to sleep so she will know I am not intentionally being mean to her. She will stay up forever if you just put her in bed while awake. Any suggestions or comments would be appreciated.
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if she goes right to sleep obviously she doesn't mind being held down, I'm thinking she never learned to fall asleep on her own so has a hard time shutting down....but I personally wouldn't do it!
at that age I would tend to all her needs (feeding changing) and when I knew she fuss cause she needs to sleep I would lay her down with a pacifier and let her cry a few minutes, then go see if she lost pacifier I would give it back, I would talk to her to reassure her I'm still near by but I would not pick her up
..I'd pay attention if her cry changes in a positive way ( sleepier ) I would leave her alone if her cry changes into a negative ( distress) I would pick her up and give her a sip of water then put her back down
perhaps it sounds cruel but unless she learns to shut down (for lack of better term) on her own she will be miserable day in and day out for a long time and so will those that have to care for her...she needs to learn to relax and go to sleep on her own -
yeah, I have to say, that by 10 months, I'm kind of cold (unemotional) about the whole thing. We have routines here. Everyone knows after meals we nap. We sing the same song every day (if there's a rabbler, anyway), and then it's cuddles, kisses, and lights out. OH, and "white noise"! I have an old box fan that sounds like a jet is in my family room when it's set on "3".
If someone makes a fuss, I wait a few minutes, go back in, resettle. I'll do that for a few times for a few days, but a lot of kids I've had would just get MORE pissed off then. After a few days, it's the same routine without the going back in. After nap is over (45min-1 hour in the morning, 2 hours in the afternoon), I go around singling loudly and making a big, happy dance of "yeah, it's time to wake up and PLAY!"
Other than newborns (like I currently have), everyone here "gets" nap time pretty quickly without a lot of fuss.Comment
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This might sound strange but i swadeled my adopted son till he was 9 months.Comment
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yeah, I have to say, that by 10 months, I'm kind of cold (unemotional) about the whole thing. We have routines here. Everyone knows after meals we nap. We sing the same song every day (if there's a rabbler, anyway), and then it's cuddles, kisses, and lights out. OH, and "white noise"! I have an old box fan that sounds like a jet is in my family room when it's set on "3".
If someone makes a fuss, I wait a few minutes, go back in, resettle. I'll do that for a few times for a few days, but a lot of kids I've had would just get MORE pissed off then. After a few days, it's the same routine without the going back in. After nap is over (45min-1 hour in the morning, 2 hours in the afternoon), I go around singling loudly and making a big, happy dance of "yeah, it's time to wake up and PLAY!"
Other than newborns (like I currently have), everyone here "gets" nap time pretty quickly without a lot of fuss.
A 10-11 month old isn't a newborn or young infant that may need some help soothing, they are practically toddlers. I would be working (very hard at this point!) on some sleep training.
I do wonder if they make sleep sacks for kids of this age? That might help with the flailing (legs anyway) and may help her sleep on her own. I wouldn't swaddle since she is almost a year.Comment
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Second the suggestion of a sleep sack.Hee hee! Look, I have a signature!Comment
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