Broken Toy

[TheGoodLife]

I gave dcb the option to either replace w/ his toy or to not bring share toys/ share other's share toys anymore and dcb happily picked not bring/not share.

DCD picked up- had dcb tell him what happened- tried 4 times, he would not say it loud enough for dad to hear. I told him what happened (that I tried to get him to replace first, he had a meltdown, so I gave choice above. DCD told dcb he WILL replace the toy- out of his piggy bank. DCM would have had a totally different reaction. I am glad DCD picked up

happyface Yay for responsible DCD! happyface

[JoseyJo]

happyface Yay for responsible DCD! happyface

Well we will see about that- Most likely he will just make it right w/o DCB having to experience any consequence. That is the way this family usually works. DCB cannot be uncomfortable, unhappy, upset, or sad.

Last week he tried to take a toy away from another child and I told him he would have to wait until the other child was done. Gma came to p/u about 15 minutes later and he runs up to her and bursts into tears. He tells her what happened (he wanted the toy and boy wouldn't give it to him) she says "Oh no! I am so sorry dgs! It's alright, it's alright, I have lots of toys at home! I will buy you a new toy! Don't cry! It's okay, I will make it good again. etc etc" (insert vomiting icon!!)

[Blackcat31]

Well we will see about that- Most likely he will just make it right w/o DCB having to experience any consequence. That is the way this family usually works. DCB cannot be uncomfortable, unhappy, upset, or sad.

Last week he tried to take a toy away from another child and I told him he would have to wait until the other child was done. Gma came to p/u about 15 minutes later and he runs up to her and bursts into tears. He tells her what happened (he wanted the toy and boy wouldn't give it to him) she says "Oh no! I am so sorry dgs! It's alright, it's alright, I have lots of toys at home! I will buy you a new toy! Don't cry! It's okay, I will make it good again. etc etc" (insert vomiting icon!!)

The two tiny words that will ultimately become the death of us (providers).

Gosh forbid, a child cries....oh the horror!

Sorry....I am just soooo tired of that scenario being played out day in and day out.....

(((HUGS))) for dealing with this. lovethis

[Angelsj]

The two tiny words that will ultimately become the death of us (providers).

Gosh forbid, a child cries....oh the horror!

Sorry....I am just soooo tired of that scenario being played out day in and day out.....

(((HUGS))) for dealing with this. lovethis

Right?? It makes me want to gag. And not just providers;
teachers, employers...and likely eventually, the police. Can you just hear it?
"But it is not FAIR that I have to drive the speed limit." or "But I WANTED that new car..so what that I can't afford it?" UGH!

[JoseyJo]

Update:

DCB came in today with a new toy to replace the one he destroyed. He told me he picked it out and mom paid for it. I thought maybe that wouldn't be enough as DCD told dcb that he would have to pay for it out of piggybank (why do parent's say one thing then do another?!?) but it seems to have worked.

He was very upset this morning that the toy he picked out at the store was now someone else's (I just let him be, feeling those feelings is good as we will remember them and not want them again IMHO!) and he came up and told me before nap that he would never ever tear up anyone else's toy

Now that being said DCM was not a happy camper this morning- Her face was so tight it could have cracked! Not sure if she was just embarrassed for/about her child or if she in some way thinks it was unfair, and I'm not gonna ask!

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Update:

DCB came in today with a new toy to replace the one he destroyed. He told me he picked it out and mom paid for it. I thought maybe that wouldn't be enough as DCD told dcb that he would have to pay for it out of piggybank (why do parent's say one thing then do another?!?) but it seems to have worked.

He was very upset this morning that the toy he picked out at the store was now someone else's (I just let him be, feeling those feelings is good as we will remember them and not want them again IMHO!) and he came up and told me before nap that he would never ever tear up anyone else's toy

Now that being said DCM was not a happy camper this morning- Her face was so tight it could have cracked! Not sure if she was just embarrassed for/about her child or if she in some way thinks it was unfair, and I'm not gonna ask!

I'd definitely ignore the silent tantrum from mom. Good for Dad for at least buying a toy. As far are the parenting goes, we are all well aware that we can't change the way a parent parents no matter how destructive it is.

[JoseyJo]

I'd definitely ignore the silent tantrum from mom. Good for Dad for at least buying a toy. As far are the parenting goes, we are all well aware that we can't change the way a parent parents no matter how destructive it is.

I for one tend to forget that I can't change them! Need to keep this in the front of my mind