Almost 23 Month Old

[abigailrw5]

I have an almost 23 month old who I've had trouble with for awhile now. I'm putting him in time outs several times a day. I warn him not to do something and he goes and does it over and over. The other kids are good when not around him but when he is around they act up too. When do you decide to terminate when you are having to do timeouts ALL THE TIME.

[MCC]

Sounds like my daughter :: My days go way better when she isn't involved in daycare time. I tell my husband all the time I wish I could term her!

Real advice- I termed a 3 year old after 6 weeks b/c I was spending more time redirecting/disciplining him than I was enjoying him, or playing with the other children. It was a really hard decision, but I am sooooo glad I did it. Good luck!

[Leigh]

No offense, but for a 23 month old, you may as well just go bang your head on the wall as give a time out. They just don't understand the concept of why they are there. The most effective methods with this age are positive attention for the good, redirecting the bad. Acknowledge why the child probably did what he did, then tell him why he can't do it, then give him another thing to do.

I know how frustrating this age is, but honestly, before age 3, time outs are quite ineffective, and after that, they're not so great either (I use them, but I try to use them only for the "big stuff" as much as possible, and when the child comes out of time out we discuss options for avoiding it in the future).

[melilley]

No offense, but for a 23 month old, you may as well just go bang your head on the wall as give a time out. They just don't understand the concept of why they are there. The most effective methods with this age are positive attention for the good, redirecting the bad. Acknowledge why the child probably did what he did, then tell him why he can't do it, then give him another thing to do.

I know how frustrating this age is, but honestly, before age 3, time outs are quite ineffective, and after that, they're not so great either (I use them, but I try to use them only for the "big stuff" as much as possible, and when the child comes out of time out we discuss options for avoiding it in the future).

I agree!

[melilley]

I agree with Leigh. Children that young really don't get anything out of time outs and I try not to do them unless it is something over the top or if they just need a rest away from all of the stimulation or if they are scream/crying I do have them step into the hallway until they calm down and I also talk about it with them. They love to test limits and will do it over and over and over....
I have a 23 month old (I call him my tornado) who used to bite and after months, yes months, he finally quit biting. I had to constantly show him nice touches, shadow him and redirect him! Now he pulls hair and does the same as the child that you mentioned; he doesn't listen and I have to tell him things over and over. I still have to shadow and redirect and show nice touches. It drives me nuts and sometimes I want to term and when he isn't here the day is so much more calm, but I keep telling myself that he is young and it will get better.

Honestly though, I don't have the heart to term him. I love his mom and if he were to go somewhere else who knows what would happen. But if I didn't like his mom so much.....

[Josiegirl]

I agree with Leigh also. Plus at that age, the less words you use the better. They don't have the attention span nor rationalization to understand or listen about the whys and why nots of things. They just do it in the heat of the moment.
It can be such a tough age but so darn cute.

[Brooksie]

No offense, but for a 23 month old, you may as well just go bang your head on the wall as give a time out. They just don't understand the concept of why they are there. The most effective methods with this age are positive attention for the good, redirecting the bad. Acknowledge why the child probably did what he did, then tell him why he can't do it, then give him another thing to do.

I know how frustrating this age is, but honestly, before age 3, time outs are quite ineffective, and after that, they're not so great either (I use them, but I try to use them only for the "big stuff" as much as possible, and when the child comes out of time out we discuss options for avoiding it in the future).

[Heidi]

No offense, but for a 23 month old, you may as well just go bang your head on the wall as give a time out. They just don't understand the concept of why they are there. The most effective methods with this age are positive attention for the good, redirecting the bad. Acknowledge why the child probably did what he did, then tell him why he can't do it, then give him another thing to do.

I know how frustrating this age is, but honestly, before age 3, time outs are quite ineffective, and after that, they're not so great either (I use them, but I try to use them only for the "big stuff" as much as possible, and when the child comes out of time out we discuss options for avoiding it in the future).