OMG FB Hit!

[mrsnj]

I just started a new family on Wed. SA and 19 month old. The baby has adjusted perfect. A complete sweetheart! The SA child has been up my butt the whole time. The mother lied about her age which I was not pleased about. I noticed she was much bigger than my daughter but don't know the dad and figured she was taking after him in size. Began asking the SA child questions about her new school (she lived here, moved away and returned) as she should not have attended there before only for her to say she had. Which, make a long story short, told me she was older than she was due to her moving dates and the grades the school has in it. I got her bdate and she is older. Too old for me to be taking really. She is almost 10. If a child is old enough to start a period or get the beginning of boobs...kinda too told for here! She won't leave her sister alone. She bugs her all day till I have to chase her away cause she gets her sister upset! Finally mom says that she is going to stay at a friends house for the summer. Cool. Works for me as she was too old to come and wasn't fitting in. The baby would stay. I was fine with that arrangement.

Today they are a no show. I call moms cell and swore someone hung up on me. Odd. She is now almost two hours late. I remember you guys on here about FB so I go on............OMG I am livid!!!

She posts on there that she has taken her girls to a horrible provider. That I have done nothing but lie to her and that I LOCK HER DAUGHTER UP IN A ROOM ALL DAY LONG AND LEAVE HER! That she now has a diaper rash....who BTW not only arrived to ME with a diaper rash but diarrhea!!!! Of which mom brought cream the first day because of it and I told dad about the diarrhea and he tells me she gets it all the time......but I CAUSED IT by leaving her daughter locked up in the room all day! I don't play with her. I do nothing with her and and just horrible and lied!! That she had to come and do drop ins to make sure everything was ok. She never did. She came and dropped off and I didnt' hear from her the rest of the time. Step dad picked up! I texted her throughout the day and filled her in. Took pics and sent them so she knew they were doing well. And she posts that?!

SERIOUSLY!? SERIOUSLY??????!!!!

#1 If you thought I was so horrible why would you bring your kids?? First day..issue?...I would be saying something or pulling.

#2 You wouldn't talk to me about it? You post it on FB?

#3 You LIE about me. I mean openly LIE about me. You bring your kid with diarrhea and rash and one day a diaper full of poo but I DID IT? SERIOUSLY!?

I do not get it!!!! She is all nicey nicey to my face and you post that poo behind my back??? Who brings their kids and do not say something if they truely thought I was doing those things....which I doubt she does cause HELLO she knows she lied herself. What I do not get is why? What did I do that she feels she has to tell these things to her friends? Attention? Crazy? I mean really!

I have police officers kids here. I have DYFS workers kids here. Does she really think I do those things? That they bring their kids here and I do those things?? Oh but wait, she might not know that CAUSE SHE DIDN'T TALK TO ME!!

I want to post back and cannot. I want to email her and tell her where she can go but cannot. She claims in the post that her youngest will come here and Wed she will be looking elsewhere on her half day. But she isn't here today so I don't think she is coming back.

I don't know how to handle this cause right now, I am trying not to say exactly what I am thinking!!!!!!

[MrsSteinel'sHouse]

I would take a picture of the post before it is removed. I don't know in this day and age if that would be slander in court but it would seem that way to me. I would consider a lawsuit. She is trying to harm your business.

[cheerfuldom]

document everything including screen shots of the FB comments

write up an immediate term letter and have someone you trust hand deliver directly to her at home or workplace so you have a witness that she got it. that will be faster than certified mail. make sure her remaining items are hand delivered

call your licensor so they are prepared for a false allegation from this mom

do not call this person or get into any sort of confrontation with her. term and b done with it.

sorry you got screwed, it happens to all of us

[mrsnj]

Should I send an official term notice? Let it go? Assume she isn't returning. I certainly would turn away at the door should she show. Pack up her things and drop off? I have never had this happen before. When I read that on here I thought "wow....never had someone do that' and yet here I am!
How do I word the terming notice without letting my anger get the better of me....black cat where are you??

The fact that I think she hung up on me and has not called...I am assuming she is a not return/no notice. Which is fine with me cause I am so mad right now I could spit! But I don't know how to go from here.

[Brooksie]

document everything including screen shots of the FB comments

write up an immediate term letter and have someone you trust hand deliver directly to her at home or workplace so you have a witness that she got it. that will be faster than certified mail. make sure her remaining items are hand delivered

call your licensor so they are prepared for a false allegation from this mom

do not call this person or get into any sort of confrontation with her. term and b done with it.

sorry you got screwed, it happens to all of us

this exactly. Make sure to call your licencor and document the FB allegations. They need to know from you before they hear it from somewhere else.

[coolconfidentme]

Screen shot the post & then send her a cease & desist post that what she wrote is libelous. If it harms your business you will seek legal action against her. I would also send it certified mail too.

[MrsSteinel'sHouse]

this exactly. Make sure to call your licencor and document the FB allegations. They need to know from you before they hear it from somewhere else.

This and I would call my lawyer. No show no call for me is immediate termination. So, I wouldn't need to terminate. Document and save all communications. If you still have "stuff" I personally wait and see if she requests it. If she does I would make arrangements with a third party, like the police department to make the transfer happen.

[CedarCreek]

That really really stinks.

You didn't happen to document that the baby had a diaper rash on the first day, did you? That would help when/if licensing comes.

I agree, term immediately. If she doesn't show and she owes you money, send her term papers and a bill via certified letter. I would also contact her and demand she remove the damaging post about your daycare if she specifically named you. Mentioning a cease and desist letter would help her get the point.

Goodluck. :hug:

[Laurel]

Also let someone else see the FB post.

One time when my daughter was divorcing a lawyer was going to use me to say what her ex had written in an email to me although I had erased the email by that time. He said it didn't matter as long as I could testify that I saw it because some of the stuff was word for word what he had said on an anonymous 'note' to neighbors to embarrass her.

Just in case, it wouldn't hurt.

Laurel

[mrsnj]

I took a page shot of it. She doesn't openly mention my name so I don't think I can itch about that. Not sure what she is saying verbally but on FB she doesn't give indication of who. I am legally unlic. so can't call state. Gonna show the post to my friend too as you mentioned.

Because she hasn't contacted me, I am assuming she is going to walk and leave everything. So half of me says SEE YA and let it go but the other half says to officially term her cause clearly she wants the upper hand but it will likely piss her off. Her kids things are all here. So not sure how long I need to hold them but...........

[TheGoodLife]

I took a page shot of it. She doesn't openly mention my name so I don't think I can itch about that. Not sure what she is saying verbally but on FB she doesn't give indication of who. I am legally unlic. so can't call state. Gonna show the post to my friend too as you mentioned.

I would still call state, even if unlicensed. I once had a parent call DHHS and say I was overratio, and I am unlicensed. They came to the house to check it out. Doesn't hurt to cover your basis in case she calls to report neglect- they will have it that you contacted them first So sorry you are going through this- I hope things end as drama-free as possible :hug:

[Blackcat31]

How's this? (The personal thoughts can be included or left out....depends on how snarky/angry you feel )

Dear DCF

Due to communication issues, our contract for child care services is cancelled, effective immediately.

Please call and make arrangements to stop by daycare and pick up your children's belongings within in the next 5 days.

Please be aware that due to some recent Facebook activity, I have contacted my attorney and will be pursuing defamation and/or slander charges should any posts concerning myself and/or my child care not be removed within the next 24 hours.

Communication is the key to any successful relationship. It is rather unfortunate that you chose an alternate method to convey your feelings/expectations.

Sincerely,

Provider


I am all for professionalism and taking the high road but sometimes, you just have to let the other person know you know....kiwm?

I'd probably want to be a little more angry in my words to her but again, I would try to take the high road.

[DaycareMomma]

I would type up the letter Blackcat posted. That is GREAT! I'd make dang sure to include the part about facebook. She needs to know that you see things and that she can't get away with posting that stuff.

[mrsnj]

I am not angry anymore. Its just really hurtful. I have been open with her. I communicated with her the whole time so she didn't worry. I spent extra time with her youngest so she would be comfortable and happy. I was really stressed out too cause my aide was sick and I was doing this all alone but I made the time for one on one. Had she talked with me I would have given her numbers of parents I have here who are 'old timers" like my 4th grader who has been here since he was 4 months old! I have older children here that all talk and certainly only enough to communicate if there were issues. Does she think only HER daughter can tell her these things? The whole lying issue to me proves she doesn't know the truth so in fact I really cant even say who is to blame cause mom clearly has no clue on the truth. I am still in shock over her blaming me for her daughters diaper rash and diarrhea. Shocked! She MUST be joking! And thinking on this......she said she pulled her oldest to go to a friends house and the little one would be coming until she could find alternate care. Now WHY would you do that if the little one could not talk?? You would pull the one who can so called fill you in and leave the little one with the 'horrible daycare provider' to fend for herself and not have a clue what was happening? I mean the whole thing doesn't click!

Pulling a child cause your guts tells you it isn't working....I get. I can even accept not talking with me even though I disagree with the method. But to openly LIE and be brazen enough to post it on FB on an unlocked page.....wow it just has me kinda ---------> God forbid the day ever came she fell and got hurt or got sick! Or Lordy broke her arm at home or something! I can only imagine what would be said and who would take that brunt! Only mental people do that!

She was upset cause I wouldn't let her 19 month old freedom to walk about with her 10 yr old sister too. Ok....#1 I clearly stated my babies are not with my older children during interview. I would like her to find a daycare that would allow babies to roam freely among 10 yr old kids. That is why they are divided into age groups. Either way her 10 yr old made the baby cry! She would go over and call her over and then run away, leaving the baby upset. Just as she would go back and play, the 10 yr old would go back over! By day two enough was enough and yep....no longer allowed contact. I am sorry but that isn't happening here. So she told her mom that I put her in a room alone and locked her up all day and she wasn't allowed to see anyone and mom stated I lied and would not let the girls play together. Really? What was that in the letter about open communication? Had she asked........

Yes I am ranting at this point and need to let it go.

Their things are packed at the door. The term notice in it just in case they come today. If I don't hear from them by Wed I will send it via mail. No contact by the pick up date.....discarding. Done.

[cheerfuldom]

I would send it now so they get a copy be Wed. and you have another copy ready when they show up. Cover all your bases and be ready for this mom to come back on you. she sounds crazy.