How To Tell New DCM, No!

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  • makap
    Daycare.com Member
    • Feb 2012
    • 252

    How To Tell New DCM, No!

    New dcb 12 months old starting in two weeks. Mom, dad and baby boy came for an interview/visit several months ago. (This was in April)

    They knew two of my other families from the past who were on my list of references and checked them out. After their initial visit they were very happy to be bringing their baby here. I really liked the mom, dad and baby. All were great! Baby boy looks very well adjusted and overall peaceful and happy!

    I also spoke with the past dcps who gave the great referrals for me who said the parents were great as well, so of course I accepted them on.

    Now baby boy 11 months will be starting in two weeks. I receive a phone call today, (voice message as I was busy & did not answer the phone)

    Mom wants to "visit" next week with her, dad and baby. I hate this and do not want to do it. How do I tell her NO!

    I know it is going to be disruptive. I have one dcg 13 months who cries every.single.time there is a drop off or pick up. She is very sensitive to this. I can not have the mailman show up at my door or a delivery man, she looses it! Plus other dcb 3 who just has to get attention whenever someone else it here.

    No way is this gonna happen but how do I tell mom no way in H*** is this gonna happen?
  • EntropyControlSpecialist
    Embracing the chaos.
    • Mar 2012
    • 7466

    #2
    "I'm sorry, but we only allow current clients to be around the children briefly during drop-offs and pick-ups only. That is for the privacy and safety of my other clients. I look forward to seeing you and baby on August xx!"

    I would never do that in a million years and would have no problem saying so. In fact, I have before when someone wanted to come and "interview" during business hours. No.

    Comment

    • nannyde
      All powerful, all knowing daycare whisperer
      • Mar 2010
      • 7320

      #3
      Just tell her you are happy to set up another meeting before the child starts and what times that would work for you. Let them know it will work best when the kids are gone for the day to give you time to visit.
      http://www.amazon.com/Daycare-Whispe...=doing+daycare

      Comment

      • daycare
        Advanced Daycare.com *********
        • Feb 2011
        • 16259

        #4
        Originally posted by makap
        New dcb 12 months old starting in two weeks. Mom, dad and baby boy came for an interview/visit several months ago. (This was in April)

        They knew two of my other families from the past who were on my list of references and checked them out. After their initial visit they were very happy to be bringing their baby here. I really liked the mom, dad and baby. All were great! Baby boy looks very well adjusted and overall peaceful and happy!

        I also spoke with the past dcps who gave the great referrals for me who said the parents were great as well, so of course I accepted them on.

        Now baby boy 11 months will be starting in two weeks. I receive a phone call today, (voice message as I was busy & did not answer the phone)

        Mom wants to "visit" next week with her, dad and baby. I hate this and do not want to do it. How do I tell her NO!

        I know it is going to be disruptive. I have one dcg 13 months who cries every.single.time there is a drop off or pick up. She is very sensitive to this. I can not have the mailman show up at my door or a delivery man, she looses it! Plus other dcb 3 who just has to get attention whenever someone else it here.

        No way is this gonna happen but how do I tell mom no way in H*** is this gonna happen?
        I know that everyone is different on this......can I suggest this...

        As a new parent, I would want to see where my kid was going to be and see how the other kids behaved and how the provider interacted with the children..... So I understand their request.

        I used to say no just like you, but then an incident occurred in my town regarding daycares and I was kind of forced into letting parents come in and view a small part of my program.

        here is what I would do..

        DCP,

        As a parent myself, I can completely understand your desire to view my program here at the daycare. I would love to have you guys come by towards the end of the day. IN past experience when conducting parent and child viewings, the other children in care often act up when other adults are around and may get overwhelming for everyone. For this reason, I ask that we keep the visit to a minimum of 20 minutes. Please let me know what day you would like to come by.......

        If you are not open to it, then maybe you could just tell them what you are telling us here.....BUT please think about letting them come take a peek....I would hate for it to cost you a new client that sounds really nice....

        Comment

        • Jewels
          Daycare.com Member
          • Aug 2010
          • 534

          #5
          I have had every one of my families stop by during daycare hours before their child has started, well every one but a couple, but I do offer it, but I would assume most would have asked even if not offered, I personally would never enroll my child in a daycare where I couldn't go and just check it out during the daycare hours, I would always have a parent come by during circle time or outdoor time, during circle time, they will do our dance time, and songs and sit in with their parent, it has always worked great for me. and then they leave right after, so a short 20-30 minute visit, they are fully aware that I am with the children and they are never looking to chat, just observe their child with me and the other kids, I think it is such a reasonable request personally, but I know every provider is different, but as a parent I would consider it a red flag, if I were told I could not come by to observe. I think for most parents it just makes it more conforting for them, being their with their child first for a bit, like an introduction into the daycare, before being just left. but I have a very open open door policy. And I run my daycare much more family and friend style.

          Comment

          • daycare
            Advanced Daycare.com *********
            • Feb 2011
            • 16259

            #6
            Originally posted by Jewels
            I have had every one of my families stop by during daycare hours before their child has started, well every one but a couple, but I do offer it, but I would assume most would have asked even if not offered, I personally would never enroll my child in a daycare where I couldn't go and just check it out during the daycare hours, I would always have a parent come by during circle time or outdoor time, during circle time, they will do our dance time, and songs and sit in with their parent, it has always worked great for me. and then they leave right after, so a short 20-30 minute visit, they are fully aware that I am with the children and they are never looking to chat, just observe their child with me and the other kids, I think it is such a reasonable request personally, but I know every provider is different, but as a parent I would consider it a red flag, if I were told I could not come by to observe. I think for most parents it just makes it more conforting for them, being their with their child first for a bit, like an introduction into the daycare, before being just left. but I have a very open open door policy. And I run my daycare much more family and friend style.
            I agree........... to what she said 100%%

            Comment

            • Josiegirl
              Daycare.com Member
              • Jun 2013
              • 10834

              #7
              I'm the first to freak out when I know a prospective dcp wants to come during work hours because I'm very self-conscious and easily intimidated. BUT I have allowed it many times, completely understand it and if the parent wants to, I will. We all know how disruptive it can be, how *that's* exactly when the kids will be jumping off the walls, fight, push, hit, run thru the house screaming, etc. I'd just explain to the parent how the kids become hams when anyone new comes in and they don't exactly act like they usually do when it's just you. She should be understanding of that, I hope. I would allow it one time and make sure you have something planned for the kiddos that they don't get to do very often so their attention is focused on that.

              And please try not to be too nervous.

              Comment

              • Lorna
                New Daycare.com Member
                • Nov 2012
                • 172

                #8
                Usually my parents come for an interview during daycare times. But its usually during nap. I wouldn't allow them to stay with the child for a visit. I had a mom ask if she could come at 7 am (we open at 7:30) and sit with the child til they settled. I said no just leave the child at 7:30. I told them I dont' open at 7 and I can't have parents in the daycare with the children. That my insurance wouldn't cover that.

                Comment

                • Laurel
                  Daycare.com Member
                  • Mar 2013
                  • 3218

                  #9
                  Originally posted by Jewels
                  I have had every one of my families stop by during daycare hours before their child has started, well every one but a couple, but I do offer it, but I would assume most would have asked even if not offered, I personally would never enroll my child in a daycare where I couldn't go and just check it out during the daycare hours, I would always have a parent come by during circle time or outdoor time, during circle time, they will do our dance time, and songs and sit in with their parent, it has always worked great for me. and then they leave right after, so a short 20-30 minute visit, they are fully aware that I am with the children and they are never looking to chat, just observe their child with me and the other kids, I think it is such a reasonable request personally, but I know every provider is different, but as a parent I would consider it a red flag, if I were told I could not come by to observe. I think for most parents it just makes it more conforting for them, being their with their child first for a bit, like an introduction into the daycare, before being just left. but I have a very open open door policy. And I run my daycare much more family and friend style.


                  When someone calls and wants to come see my daycare I tell them I have interviews in the evening but they can also come a second time during daycare hours if they want to see the daycare in action. I think I've only had 1or 2 take me up on that and it went fine.

                  Laurel

                  Comment

                  • Sugar Magnolia
                    Blossoms Blooming
                    • Apr 2011
                    • 2647

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Laurel


                    When someone calls and wants to come see my daycare I tell them I have interviews in the evening but they can also come a second time during daycare hours if they want to see the daycare in action. I think I've only had 1or 2 take me up on that and it went fine.

                    Laurel
                    Ditto this!

                    Comment

                    • Familycare71
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • Apr 2011
                      • 1716

                      #11
                      In the future this will be how I handle it... A 20-30 min window. Gives the parent peice of mind and let's me keep my sanity-
                      Thanks guys for always having such great ideas!!happyface

                      Comment

                      • MarinaVanessa
                        Family Childcare Home
                        • Jan 2010
                        • 7211

                        #12
                        Originally posted by Laurel


                        When someone calls and wants to come see my daycare I tell them I have interviews in the evening but they can also come a second time during daycare hours if they want to see the daycare in action. I think I've only had 1or 2 take me up on that and it went fine.

                        Laurel
                        This is how I do it as well ... sort of. I explain that the first interview is during non business hours so that o can focus on them and not jeopardize the safety of the other children by not being able to supervise them problem by being distracted during the day. Then I explain that a second meeting is scheduled during daycare hours (30 minutes) so that the parent and the child can get a feel for my daycare. Some take me up on the second meeting, some dont. I prefer to have them come for that short 30 mins so that I can get a feel for the family dynamic and how the child reacts around the other children.

                        Comment

                        • Meeko
                          Advanced Daycare.com Member
                          • Mar 2011
                          • 4349

                          #13
                          If you feel you must oblige, then I would make sure to let them know it is for a set appointment time. They cannot just hang around as they please.

                          I personally never allow anyone to be around children that are not their own at ANY time.

                          Comment

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