Screaming child

[Unregistered]

OK...got a kid who never stops screaming. Literally ALL DAY LONG unless kid is held. Kid is 9 months old. Does this at home, as well. Mom and Dad say that they deal with it by setting kid on floor and walking away. Say that kid is just spoiled. REALLY? Spoiled? They tell me that they never hold kid and then call kid spoiled.

Kid doesn't nap, either. EVER. Sleeps FOURTEEN hours at night, then comes here and screams all day. Today is kid's 12th time at my home. I thought that it was maybe just that kid needed time to adjust, but after talking with parents, this is the norm.

I suggested a physical exam at clinic-I can't imagine why a kid would scream all day. This is not crying-it is all out screaming.

My other DCK's see this one walk in and cover their ears. Stress levels here are through the roof. Talked to Mom again tonight, she KNOWS I am ready to term. Told her other kids can't sleep, I can't even go pee without screaming, can't change another kid's diaper or serve a meal without screaming.

One more thing, kid bangs head, back on walls or appliances forward on furniture, even floor. Kid left with a mark on forehead today from banging it on crib (actually slept today-less than 20 minutes).

I should have already termed, but I feel for the kid and parents (even though I believe they are NOT ideal parents). Husband is insisting I term tomorrow, DCK's are asking me to do so, as well-say kid is too loud! I'm here to ask if anyone has ANY ideas about this kid. I suggested that perhaps kid is allergic to milk-parents say kid is not (kid has red nose, red cheeks). I say milk because kid eats NO table food yet...just formula and stage 2 baby food and rice cereal.

Anyone have ANY ideas on why kid spends life screaming (and I TRULY mean this-the kid screams if kid even THINKS you are going to set kid down)?

[countrymom]

I'm wondering if the child is looking for attention because he's not getting any, or maybe teething is a problem (ask mom to try some tylenol and see if this helps) or maybe the childs ears hurt. Otherwise, I also wonder if this child needs a strict routine. When its nap time, 9am, child goes down and by the sounds of it, he needs cio. After 1 hour I would get them up and lay down at 1 pm and do it again.

[melilley]

I once had a child who screamed ALL day long and was around the same age as your dck. She did it home and drove her parents nuts also. I worked at a center at the time so I had to deal with it and I couldn't stand it! Finally, one day, months later, the child stopped screaming. Her parents or I didn't know why she screamed and she did it whether she was happy, sad, tired, etc....
The child did have allergies, but we knew about them by then so who knows. Good luck!

[williams2008]

I had 5 month old twins that were the same way, except for the banging of the head. They screamed the ENTIRE day. The mom said she didn't sit up and hold them but her relatives did. All I know is somebody did because as soon as I would pick them up, the screaming would stop and soon as I put them down they started up again.

It took a long time before they got adjusted to my routine. They are 2 now and they will still scream when they can't have their way.

Here's a big :hug: I know exactly what you and your other dcks are going through!

[Willow]

Google "disorganized attachment disorder" or "insecure attachment disorder."

If mom and dad really believe that at 9 months old their child is spoiled, and are inclined to just set him down and leave him there screaming at home, odds are he doesn't trust that caregivers in his life will ever consistently meet his needs.

Can be an incredibly scary and anxiety fueled way of thinking, which will definitely produce an infant who bawls and screams to the point of being rip your hair out over kill.

[countrymom]

Google "disorganized attachment disorder" or "insecure attachment disorder."

If mom and dad really believe that at 9 months old their child is spoiled, and are inclined to just set him down and leave him there screaming at home, odds are he doesn't trust that caregivers in his life will ever consistently meet his needs.

Can be an incredibly scary and anxiety fueled way of thinking, which will definitely produce an infant who bawls and screams to the point of being rip your hair out over kill.

thanks I'm going to look this up. I have a 14 month old like this. You know how bad it is, today even my 10 yr old was covering his ears. I had to shut the windows. I don't know what is wrong with her. It started 2 weeks ago. She doesn't walk acually refuses to walk. I thought it was her legs but nope she's doing it on purpose. Then I wondered if her pants where too tight (she is really fat little girl) so I took her pants off, they were jeans. I found that I had to keep giving her food just so she was quiet but she's eating more than the preschoolers. She also a junk food eater, can you believe that the other day mom gave her 3 large oreo cookies and she wanted more. My school age kids can only eat 3 cookies.

[cheerfuldom]

the head banging may be an attempt to self soothe (attachment issues like a previous poster said) and/or block out the outside world due to sensory issues. Either way, it sounds like parents are mishandling this child. There IS something wrong when a kid is crying all day every day but it is the parents responsibility to solve the issue, not yours.