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I'm a newer provider and currently only watch one kid other than my own baby. She is almost 2 1/2 and my son is 9 months. I've been watching her for about 3 months and sharing has always been a big problem. I thought by this point we would have made some type of progress, but nope and now that my son is crawling it's getting worse cause he can play with more toys than he used too. She constantly takes toys from him and doesn't want him to touch much of anything that's in the room other than a few of his toys, but she likes those too. I know some of this is normal because of her age, but what do I do? I put her in timeout when it gets bad, but I don't want to be doing that constantly. I talked to the parents and asked them to make her share with them at home and they have been working on it. Any tips on additional things I can try? I'm seriously going crazy dealing with this!
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You need to teach her “Surrender to the baby" first. Check out my blog with that title. -
I dont think its developmentally appropriate to expect a 2 year old to share in the classic sense. She isnt capable of the give and take of play yet so I wouldnt expect it of her. I also don't do timeouts, period. I also don't expect parents to solve an issue that is happening at daycare. It sounds like she is getting territorial of both you and your home....testing the boundaries and sensing that she is in charge. Don't even worry about the two kids playing together for now. Focus on her learning to play on her own and staying away from the baby. Anything that is taken away from the baby is given right back to him and she is redirected to what she can play with. If kids are mean to a baby here (and I dont let anyone ever near younger infants), I dont allow them to even get near the baby. Its going to require you to be carefully watching for however long it takes. Its extra work for you but every time she gets too close, you redirect her back to what she can play with or do. She will learn how close is too close to the baby. No timeout or other discipline that she will not even understand.....just clear, simple instructions of what she can do. She can't handle the freedom that you are currently giving her, that of playing with the baby and having free reign of the toys and house.Comment
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The only thing I would say is that this isn't "extra" work. This is the job you signed on for. Teaching a 2 yo that they can't get close enough to baby to take toys is all part of the job. When I have kids that young, I have a super play yard I will bring out to have separate play spaces, so young toddlers can't get that close to babies. When kids are out in the "gen pop" I am always between them and the littles. When I can't be, everyone has a space they go to. I do like NannyDe's "surrender to the baby" and she has some videos that are awesome. But anything you do will require work/training on your part.Comment
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Haha, I call it 'general population' also. :
The only thing I would say is that this isn't "extra" work. This is the job you signed on for. Teaching a 2 yo that they can't get close enough to baby to take toys is all part of the job. When I have kids that young, I have a super play yard I will bring out to have separate play spaces, so young toddlers can't get that close to babies. When kids are out in the "gen pop" I am always between them and the littles. When I can't be, everyone has a space they go to. I do like NannyDe's "surrender to the baby" and she has some videos that are awesome. But anything you do will require work/training on your part.
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LaurelComment
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The blog nannyde is talking about is here. https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/ and you choose the category 'Infants' from the right side. It is the second article down.
LaurelComment
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She has another video that shows how to train the kids to stay in certain areas using visual barriers (NO GATES!happyface) that I have adapted to my space. I was having some issues with kids going into my foyer and either trying to escape or climb up the side of my stairs
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I meant "extra work" as in it IS more work to shadow a child and careful teach them, versus just letting them figure it out on their own. yes it is the providers job to do whatever it takes to get this worked out. we are saying the same thing, just in different wording.
The only thing I would say is that this isn't "extra" work. This is the job you signed on for. Teaching a 2 yo that they can't get close enough to baby to take toys is all part of the job. When I have kids that young, I have a super play yard I will bring out to have separate play spaces, so young toddlers can't get that close to babies. When kids are out in the "gen pop" I am always between them and the littles. When I can't be, everyone has a space they go to. I do like NannyDe's "surrender to the baby" and she has some videos that are awesome. But anything you do will require work/training on your part.Comment
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Thank you for this this is great!! I will absolutely be implementing this right away! She is constantly correcting him and telling him "no" so this will really solve all the problems I'm having. My space isn't huge so creating just an area for the babies isn't really realistic when they're mobile. My son also lives here so he plays with all the toys 24/7 and knows where stuff is so if I tried to block him from his favorite items he would get quite upset! I think it will take awhile to teach this to her, but hopefully I will have more success than what I've been doing. She also has a baby sister at home and the parents have been having similar issues so I will definitely be sharing this technique with them as well. Thanks so much geez this forum rocks!!
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Oh my gosh, that sounds wonderful! Would you know where I could find it? Is it somewhere in her blog?She has another video that shows how to train the kids to stay in certain areas using visual barriers (NO GATES!happyface) that I have adapted to my space. I was having some issues with kids going into my foyer and either trying to escape or climb up the side of my stairs
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Thanks, LaurelComment
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