Need Some Advice On Whole Group Behavior....

[WImom]

Need some advice...lately with my current group of kids I feel I sometimes have no control over them. 5 out 8 of them ruin everything by becoming too hyper, or they turn everything into weapons, chasing bad guys, etc. I haven't changed my rules, some have been here two years now. Is it because they are all 3.5-5y and kids these days watch too much junk on tv? I feel like I don't want to plan anything until next fall when they all leave (except one but she is the least of my hyper ones)

I have taken toys away, rearranged my space twice, tried getting new toys. All cars toys they just wheel them around and crash them. So i take them away. All table toys become cookies instead of sorting, patterns, matching, etc. the large set of tools I just bought last weekend were great outside for two days and now today they tried chasing others with them to saw them with the fake saw. The flower shop I set up yesterday is already down because the brown puff balls I had for dirt kept getting thrown around as we'll as the flowers. I hate my job right now .

How can I get past this? Terming is not an option.

[canadiancare]

If they were your children what would you do?
Tough love time.

If you don't know how to manage with my toys I will put them away and you won't have any. Sit on the floor with them and play with the kids who are using the toys as they are intended to be used.

[WImom]

Yeah, been doing that for a few weeks now. I have also explained they are my toys, etc. I am letting them use them. I wonder about having almost no toys here and we can bring back one toy every day they behave? Not sure.

[Heidi]

Well! :hug::hug:

Is it possible that your agenda and theirs don't mesh?

Seriously, though, it sounds like you have set up some really creative learning activities, and they are going unappreciated! It sounds like they need more structure in some ways, less in others.

For instance, using the counters as cookies sounds creative. I'd probably say "wow, you guys are being really creative" vs. saying "hey...those are counters!" but, that's comfortable for me.

I have a few questions, then I'll try to come back and give you some ideas:

Are all your kiddos 3-5? Fill me in on the group. Age, gender, etc...
Do you have interest centers set up?
Do you have a circle time or other structured time?
Do you have things labeled, a picture calendar, written expectation and rules?
Do all the children play in all areas at the same time, or do they split up?
How much space do you have?
What are the favorite toys there?
What are YOUR favorite activities? Are you an artist, reader?

[cheerfuldom]

the summer for kids go to school is a nightmare. I would take all "weapon" type toys away and do a TON of outdoor time. as much as possible. drop off, outdoor time (do any program or snack and even lunch outside!), nap, back outdoors till pickup.

one of my friends had a group of 4 and 5 years old one summer. my sister was her assistant and said it was a nightmare. they were outside ALL the time. lots of water play too. do not let them sit down for games.....keep them moving!

[mbullette]

I am 100% sure I have that same group. I dread watching these kids lately. Everything turns into war, fighting, guns, wrestling and the list goes on. I have all boys right now. I am lost in what to do also and by 5pm I need a drink or four.

[daycare]

I have 14 boys and 3 girls.....

I have some that are very good at adapting to sit down and play, then I have some that can't no matter what...

Have you thought about maybe setting up activities that require more large motor skills and require more movement?

the first 1hour of my program is all about movement. If I didn't do this, 85% of them would not be able to sit for story time or even meal time.

[preschoolteacher]

Are the kids not allowed to play with weapons or play "bad guys?" I know some people have problems with allowing this sort of play. I've had my own struggles with it in the past, but I've come to terms that some kids--especially ages 3.5 to 5--need the rough-housing play.

There's this book: Rethinking Superhero and Weapons Play http://www.amazon.com/Rethinking-Superhero-And-Weapon-Play/dp/0335247067/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1368123896&sr=8-1&keywords=rethinking+superhero+and+weapon+play

Here's a bit of description: The book tackles these questions and suggests some alternative perspectives, as well as offering practical advice about keeping children's superhero and weapon play positive and productive. An exploration of how superhero and weapon play relates to the development of children's moral values, moral principles and moral reasoning; the building of children's co-operation, empathy and sense of community; and the development of children's sense of self and self-esteem.

It's pretty interesting.

A few ideas:
1. Can you find ways to compromise with them? Maybe you will only permit "good guys/bad guys" play, but they all have to be on the same side. You could teach them to say "stop, that hurts" if another kid gets too rough. Or you could make them ask before they pretend to hit or shoot someone (if that's within your comfort level).

2. You can redirect their games by giving them another physical challenge within their game... maybe they are doing the good guys/bad guys thing, and you tell them they have to race to get to the top of the mountain (climb up a hill), or jump across the lava pit (balance beam or jumping on circles you draw with chalk), or something that takes up a lot of energy but enables them to continue pretending to be good guys/bad guys but distracts them from pretending to shoot each other.

3. Replace all toys with things they can throw, use physically.

4. Sensory table and sensory experiences can replace toys that break and will give active kids an outlet.

[jenn]

Sorry you're having a tough time! I've been there. I had one that would just bang toys together. Cars, legos, balls,...whatever you gave him, he just crashed them into each other. The others would mimic him and it drove me crazy. He left for preschool, so that ended that. I'm no expert so these are just ideas (and you've probably already tried them anyway):
*Only have out a few toys at a time, just enough for everyone to have something.
*Rotate toys daily or often.
*individual play. Sometimes they do feed off of each other, so playing with their own tub of toys can stop that.
*Model appropriate use of the toy and if the toy becomes a weapon or used in a not acceptable manner, it goes away or to someone else.

Every morning we have "Tub time". I have 6 kids, so I select 6 tubs of toys. I show everyone what is in the tub and something fun to do with it. Then I spread the tubs around the room and assign each kid a tub. After a short time, we change tubs. Everyone gets a chance with each tub. If during their time they cannot handle playing acceptably, their tub is taken and they wait until it's time to change spots.

Today our tubs were:
1. Big legos
2. Doll bathing (tub with a little water, a doll, a washcloth, a comb,...even the boys love it)
3. Play food and plates
4. Paper and crayons
5. Little People house
6. cars and track

As they get better at playing appropriately individually, try pairing them up.

[MrsSteinel'sHouse]

How many do you have? Can you take them for a long walk? That settles mine down.
Set up an obstacle course? Have them run between cones etc. physically wear them out? I would limit toys. Sit down and tell them your expectations. Ask for their input. What would hey like to be able to do? Or what theme? If it comes from them it might strike an interest. Shorten time for activities.
Theme days.. Messy Mondays, science tuesdays, cooking Wednesdays, thrilling Thursdays (do like a treasure hunt or something they would love) field trip Fridays ( even if you don't go anywhere you could.. Mexico make tissue paper flowers, eat tacos outside, take a siesta.) hmmm. This maybe my plan for he summer change it up a bit and see if they respond. Definitely more hands on supervision. And this is the one for me, remember what you love about each kido. It is easy when we get into bad behavior to become negative toward the kids and not want to be nice to them. Think about what you love about them. A is very verbal and loves to have "school type activities" B loves worms and art. C is a smartie needs hugs. D best grin ever! Etc.... Think what hey would love to do and do it!

[Thetotspot]

Outside...to get energy out.

And...my all time favorite secret weapon...

I split children into groups of two...i dont put them with their biggest enemy or their best frie d, i put them with somebody that maybe they dont play with enough (other factors i use are age, and the older they are the more likely i am to put same genders together as i will float around the building during this). And ill send each group of two (sometimes a third if we have an odd number) to a different area. Brian and jacob are playing with the marble run in my office with the door open. Babies hope and erin are in the living room, gate is up, jackie and johnny are playing at the sensory table and carla and jeff are painting. Having a child in a small group with only one thing to do will really cause the children to engage in that activity. The sensory table has always been fun...messy, disorganized, chaotic fun...but now that there are only two children here and these two children were asked to play here, we start inventing games, exploring the items differently, using more descriptive words, etc. Any time i need to cook and i have nine children who wont stop running and throwing toys, this works every time. I love this, and after only doing once, the kids ask for every day..." miss #%&*, can we do stations?" :-)

[WImom]

Well! :hug::hug:

Is it possible that your agenda and theirs don't mesh?

Seriously, though, it sounds like you have set up some really creative learning activities, and they are going unappreciated! It sounds like they need more structure in some ways, less in others.

For instance, using the counters as cookies sounds creative. I'd probably say "wow, you guys are being really creative" vs. saying "hey...those are counters!" but, that's comfortable for me.

I have a few questions, then I'll try to come back and give you some ideas:

Are all your kiddos 3-5? Fill me in on the group. Age, gender, etc...
Do you have interest centers set up?
Do you have a circle time or other structured time?
Do you have things labeled, a picture calendar, written expectation and rules?
Do all the children play in all areas at the same time, or do they split up?
How much space do you have?
What are the favorite toys there?
What are YOUR favorite activities? Are you an artist, reader?

All 3-5
Yes, we have a house center, reading center, then table toys/drawing,etc are at our main table, then a main toys area.
My day is run like a preschool - playtime, circle time, snack, playtime,art, playtime, outside/music time, lunch and then nap and playtime. I will throw in some small group time during the playtime after art or we do some science.

The children do split up - I have a limit at the house center of three kids.

It changes on favorites - they like cars, puzzles, building. But a few can only last few minutes with those items before going crazy and then others feed on that.

I like art and doing one on one stuff with them - preschool - like working on letters, etc. they do great with that but it's hard to do lately because of the crazy kids.

Outside they just run and scream chasing each other in circles. Now if I tell they can't and list off all the things they can do most of the time they will be I engaged for a while. The running and chasing are fine and we play games outside and those are good but after while I get sick of the scream as well as my neighbors I'm sure. I know they say do active things before circle, etc but that makes my group worse. They are actually good during circle time. It's free play that the problem and sometimes group stuff.

[Heidi]

All 3-5
Yes, we have a house center, reading center, then table toys/drawing,etc are at our main table, then a main toys area.
My day is run like a preschool - playtime, circle time, snack, playtime,art, playtime, outside/music time, lunch and then nap and playtime. I will throw in some small group time during the playtime after art or we do some science.

The children do split up - I have a limit at the house center of three kids.

It changes on favorites - they like cars, puzzles, building. But a few can only last few minutes with those items before going crazy and then others feed on that.

I like art and doing one on one stuff with them - preschool - like working on letters, etc. they do great with that but it's hard to do lately because of the crazy kids.

Outside they just run and scream chasing each other in circles. Now if I tell they can't and list off all the things they can do most of the time they will be I engaged for a while. The running and chasing are fine and we play games outside and those are good but after while I get sick of the scream as well as my neighbors I'm sure. I know they say do active things before circle, etc but that makes my group worse. They are actually good during circle time. It's free play that the problem and sometimes group stuff.

A lot of great ideas so far from PP's.

I would make more of your program outside if at all possible. So what if they scream and run...let 'em run it off! I bet there are tons of ideas on pintrest on fun outdoor activities. You don't have to be inside at all except nap, really. Just think...no house cleaning. happyface

Here are a ton of ideas:

http://theplayfiles.blogspot.com.au/

I have all infants and toddlers. I just moved my whole playroom to the front (covered) porch. We only come in to sleep, then back out we go. My "big kids" (18mo and 2 yo) can go out on the playground (right next to porch) when the porch feels too small for us.

[WImom]

Thank you for all the ideas. I could narrow down to two kids that are the "leaders" and one leaves in 4 weeks. I really hope it will calm things down. I don't allow any weapon type play but I am going to try and come up with other ways to change that into something else, like the climbing to the top of the mountain, etc. it just started getting warm here (WI) so going outside more should help. Thanks again!!!

[Heidi]

Thank you for all the ideas. I could narrow down to two kids that are the "leaders" and one leaves in 4 weeks. I really hope it will calm things down. I don't allow any weapon type play but I am going to try and come up with other ways to change that into something else, like the climbing to the top of the mountain, etc. it just started getting warm here (WI) so going outside more should help. Thanks again!!!

Hey...you're in balmy SOUTHERN Wisconsin, aren't you? Practically the tropics...



I'm way up nord here...

Are ya commin to de conference?