Would Your Husband Go For It?

[Play Care]

The thread about the mom who trains and wanted FT day care got me thinking. I can't imagine my husband ever being okay with that. No matter how much money we made. A mother's helper in a day here and there? Sure. But if the whole reason I wasn't working was to be a SAHM, I guess the expectation would be that I would, well, stay home. Maybe it's because my area isn't that affluent, so we don't have the SAHM with a nanny situation as the norm. I don't know...Am I the only one?

(And I do think SAHM's "work" but I'm talking about the income generating kind of work)

[daycarediva]

NO WAY! My dh said he could see 1/2 day prek, or part time care for socialization and to give Mom a break or time to train, but not 50 hours a week.

I have to admit, I was quite envious of her situation, I would love to be a sahm but that isn't in the cards for us. (although I do enjoy my job, it's tiring and stressful and does mean less time devoted to my own kids, just like any other job.)

[RosieMommy]

I highly doubt my husband would be ok with that. The benefit of me being SAHM would be me being home. I do take two days a week to write but even then my daughter is only at daycare for half a day. He takes my writing seriously but up to a point.

[coolconfidentme]

I have running buddies who pay for PT DC because their husband will NOT watch the kids while they run. They aren't into fitness & resent the time it takes to prepare for an event.

I pay PT help so I can train too, my situation is totally different though. I'm a provider & my DC is open 1st, 2nd & 3rd shift Mon-Fri. (not in my home) I can't find consistent FT help for the off shifts, so I am here throughout the week until I do. I train 3 nights a week & weekends, it's my sanity.

I am in events every other weekend. Mostly half, full, trail & relay marathons. (I do the 5K fun runs too.) I am currently training for my first ultra marathon, gulp. Running on a treadmill while kids sleep isn't the same road/trail running.


ps... I have no hubster to complain. happyface

[RosieMommy]

I have running buddies who pay for PT DC because their husband will NOT watch the kids while they run. They aren't into fitness & resent the time it takes to prepare for an event.

I pay PT help so I can train too, my situation is totally different though. I'm a provider & my DC is open 1st, 2nd & 3rd shift Mon-Fri. (not in my home) I can't find consistent FT help for the off shifts, so I am here throughout the week until I do. I train 3 nights a week & weekends, it's my sanity.

I am in events every other weekend. Mostly half, full, trail & relay marathons. (I do the 5K fun runs too.) I am currently training for my first ultra marathon, gulp. Running on a treadmill while kids sleep isn't the same road/trail running.


ps... I have no hubster to complain. happyface

So the husbands are available, they just don't want to? I find family dynamics, even my own, so interesting. Lol at your PS.

[canadiancare]

I think if we didn't have to worry about money and I was a hot trophy wife he'd be fine with it. If he hated his job and begrudged me the freedom to do my own thing then it would be a different story. Unfortunately I don't expect to ever be in the situation where I can test this.

[RosieMommy]

Here's another question I have and I'm wondering if it impacts the answer to the thread: if you're a mother and don't work outside of the home does that automatically mean you're a SAHM? In other words, you're not working but the reason you aren't isn't to stay home with your children.

[Play Care]

I think if we didn't have to worry about money and I was a hot trophy wife he'd be fine with it. If he hated his job and begrudged me the freedom to do my own thing then it would be a different story. Unfortunately I don't expect to ever be in the situation where I can test this.

I've got the hot trophy wife part down!::

[Play Care]

I have running buddies who pay for PT DC because their husband will NOT watch the kids while they run. They aren't into fitness & resent the time it takes to prepare for an event.

I pay PT help so I can train too, my situation is totally different though. I'm a provider & my DC is open 1st, 2nd & 3rd shift Mon-Fri. (not in my home) I can't find consistent FT help for the off shifts, so I am here throughout the week until I do. I train 3 nights a week & weekends, it's my sanity.

I am in events every other weekend. Mostly half, full, trail & relay marathons. (I do the 5K fun runs too.) I am currently training for my first ultra marathon, gulp. Running on a treadmill while kids sleep isn't the same road/trail running.


ps... I have no hubster to complain. happyface

That is awesome! See, my husband would have no issue "watching" his own kids:: while I pursued other things *with* reason. When I was taking classes in the evenings, he was my biggest cheerleader. When I was trying to do the couch to 5K challenge, he encouraged me and made sure I had time in the evenings to run (I found I only feel like running if I'm being chased:: )

[daycare]

yes he would. IN fact I plan to do exactly what this mom is doing when my youngest hits high school..

[Laurel]

I'm not sure. I'll ask him as he'll be coming home soon.

Laurel

[Lyss]

No way my dh would be ok with dd being in daycare 10hours, 5 days a week when I'm not working. Occasionally sure, even a few hours a week would be fine but not full time. If it was him not working same rules apply. We've made a commitment to put our children 1st, yes we need breaks and things/time to ourselves but our family comes 1st.

NOT saying anyone who would or does do this is wrong, its just not something our family would do

[DaisyMamma]

I don't think it would be a problem if money was no issue.

It sounds like the woman in the other thread has been doing this a long time, even before the baby.
I don't think she had the baby and then said - Oh, I'm going to quit my job and be a SAHM and then - Oh by the way, I'm not going to take care of little Johnny after all, I'm going to send him to daycare.

[Blackcat31]

Here's another question I have and I'm wondering if it impacts the answer to the thread: if you're a mother and don't work outside of the home does that automatically mean you're a SAHM? In other words, you're not working but the reason you aren't isn't to stay home with your children.

I'm confused by your question....

If I have children and don't work outside the home, I would be a stay at home mom.

I guess I am not understanding very clearly....

Sorry.....I am sure it is pretty simple but those kinds of questions are the ones that throw me

[daycarediva]

I don't think it would be a problem if money was no issue.

It sounds like the woman in the other thread has been doing this a long time, even before the baby.
I don't think she had the baby and then said - Oh, I'm going to quit my job and be a SAHM and then - Oh by the way, I'm not going to take care of little Johnny after all, I'm going to send him to daycare.

Op of the other thread. She started ft training when her son was 6 months old. Prior to that she worked FT (with her Dh, they met at work).