HELP with DCM in Between Jobs....

[ninosqueridos]

DCM lost her job 2 weeks ago, used up her deposit for the final week. I let her bring dcb once per week (not contracted, sort of a drop in, not holding spot).

She knows I am advertising and interviewing families to fill his spot while she is in job limbo. She has now asked me to let her know if I find someone because her MIL is willing to pay to keep DCB here full time so as to not lose his spot. WTH?!?! If she is willing to pay, why not pay NOW instead of letting me go through ALL the trouble of advertising, answering calls, preparing my home and family, interviewing...only to go back to a prospective family and tell them NO?

I need to word it nicely that I will NOT do that but need to also give her an option as I just absolutely love this dcb and he was my first dck. I'm thinking to call her and explain that if she does want to keep him here full-time, that I would need a deposit now for her son, but that we could begin care 10/4 so it would give her time to do whatever she needs to do. That would be a whole month since she initially terminated. AND if SHE decides not to do that, then I would bring a new family on if I found one.

WWYD?!?! It's hard because every time she talks about finding a perm job quickly (has a temp job that may become perm soon but doesn't know yet).................her eyes get all teary and face turns red.

[Lilbutterflie]

I would do the same thing, explain that you will keep his spot open until 10/4, but a deposit would be needed by such and such date (sometime very soon, I'm sure if MIL is willing to pay for his full time care, she can come up with the deposit soon). If she decides not to, advertise and fill the spot. Good luck!

[laundryduchess@yahoo.com]

DING DING DIN G!!!!! this Moms name isnt Jennifer is it? Cause I have the same flipping MOM.

got fired,...wanted part time to look for a job. Ok, no problem, we can do part time. ,.. so I notified my referral that I had an opening,..less than an hour later I had an interview set up. . she noticed my interview packet on the desk,.. I told her I was interviewing for the spot. She said,.. oh,... sounded hurt that I would replace him,..."well let me know how it goes because if it goes well Ill put him at full time again,.. I dont want to lose his spot. "...
so I interviewed,... told her it went well. she bumped back to full time starting this monday,...(NEVER DID I MENTION THE FACT THAT BABY JOSIE WONT BE BORN UNTIL NOV 30) LOL

I gave her her balance yesterday. Saying your balance due friday is ***. Today she showed up,.. with the news of a job interview today at a very nice day spa we have here. I wished her luck, and got on with our day. I have a payment box parents use so money is in a secure place, and Im notlosing it. well I checked, no money from her....I know dad will probably pickup and he has never once paid, so Ill text her after dad picks up and remind her that her balance is due,...and that late fees will be tacked on until it is paid. Im tired of dealing with it.

[MarinaVanessa]

Seems very unreal. I'd just be blunt with her and tell her that unless she is willing to pay and sign the contract now that the spot will remain open and you WILL try to fill it. If you get potential client that is serious and wants the spot you WILL take it, since there is no point in holding interviews and going through that hassle only to tell them that you don't have an opening.

How selfish are people? You are expected to hold this spot open for her even thought she is not taking her child to DC or paying for this time AND go through the work and money to try to fill it AND then tell an interested client "Oh, thanks for coming to the interview and liking my dayvcare. Let me tell my other family that may still want this spot if they are still interested in it or not. I'll let you know whether I really have a spot for you or not" :confused:.

[laundryduchess@yahoo.com]

Just got a text from my clueless mom,... said,.. Im sending 50 with dad today at pickup for you, Ill have 100 for you on monday.

I just sent her a text reminding her that she promised to pay 100 today and 100 monday,.... we shall see.

DING DING DIN G!!!!! this Moms name isnt Jennifer is it? Cause I have the same flipping MOM.

got fired,...wanted part time to look for a job. Ok, no problem, we can do part time. ,.. so I notified my referral that I had an opening,..less than an hour later I had an interview set up. . she noticed my interview packet on the desk,.. I told her I was interviewing for the spot. She said,.. oh,... sounded hurt that I would replace him,..."well let me know how it goes because if it goes well Ill put him at full time again,.. I dont want to lose his spot. "...
so I interviewed,... told her it went well. she bumped back to full time starting this monday,...(NEVER DID I MENTION THE FACT THAT BABY JOSIE WONT BE BORN UNTIL NOV 30) LOL

I gave her her balance yesterday. Saying your balance due friday is ***. Today she showed up,.. with the news of a job interview today at a very nice day spa we have here. I wished her luck, and got on with our day. I have a payment box parents use so money is in a secure place, and Im notlosing it. well I checked, no money from her....I know dad will probably pickup and he has never once paid, so Ill text her after dad picks up and remind her that her balance is due,...and that late fees will be tacked on until it is paid. Im tired of dealing with it.

[ninosqueridos]

I would do the same thing, explain that you will keep his spot open until 10/4, but a deposit would be needed by such and such date (sometime very soon, I'm sure if MIL is willing to pay for his full time care, she can come up with the deposit soon). If she decides not to, advertise and fill the spot. Good luck!

Thanks! I think the MIL (&FIL) are willing to pay since it would be waaayyy hard for THEM to take care of dcb. ::

[ninosqueridos]

DING DING DIN G!!!!! this Moms name isnt Jennifer is it? Cause I have the same flipping MOM.

got fired,...wanted part time to look for a job. Ok, no problem, we can do part time. ,.. so I notified my referral that I had an opening,..less than an hour later I had an interview set up. . she noticed my interview packet on the desk,.. I told her I was interviewing for the spot. She said,.. oh,... sounded hurt that I would replace him,..."well let me know how it goes because if it goes well Ill put him at full time again,.. I dont want to lose his spot. "...
so I interviewed,... told her it went well. she bumped back to full time starting this monday,...(NEVER DID I MENTION THE FACT THAT BABY JOSIE WONT BE BORN UNTIL NOV 30) LOL

I gave her her balance yesterday. Saying your balance due friday is ***. Today she showed up,.. with the news of a job interview today at a very nice day spa we have here. I wished her luck, and got on with our day. I have a payment box parents use so money is in a secure place, and Im notlosing it. well I checked, no money from her....I know dad will probably pickup and he has never once paid, so Ill text her after dad picks up and remind her that her balance is due,...and that late fees will be tacked on until it is paid. Im tired of dealing with it.

YIKES!! Our dcms are cut from the same cloth!

[ninosqueridos]

Just got a text from my clueless mom,... said,.. Im sending 50 with dad today at pickup for you, Ill have 100 for you on monday.

I just sent her a text reminding her that she promised to pay 100 today and 100 monday,.... we shall see.

unbelievable. smh

[ninosqueridos]

Seems very unreal. I'd just be blunt with her and tell her that unless she is willing to pay and sign the contract now that the spot will remain open and you WILL try to fill it. If you get potential client that is serious and wants the spot you WILL take it, since there is no point in holding interviews and going through that hassle only to tell them that you don't have an opening.

How selfish are people? You are expected to hold this spot open for her even thought she is not taking her child to DC or paying for this time AND go through the work and money to try to fill it AND then tell an interested client "Oh, thanks for coming to the interview and liking my dayvcare. Let me tell my other family that may still want this spot if they are still interested in it or not. I'll let you know whether I really have a spot for you or not" :confused:.

Okay, so at least I'm not crazy and this is just very selfish on her part. She is making me feel like the bad guy - keeps saying "I'm reeeally trying to get this job permanently....you know, our kids are being raised together.......he really loves it here......etc"

[laundryduchess@yahoo.com]

the "he really loves it here," is the part that makes me angry! They use our love for their children to make us feel guilty for wanting paid for a job that isnt easy, glamorous, or appreciated! "The only time some parents really appreciate a childcare provider is when they dont have one." That is something a mentor once told me. Thats like getting a 4 wheel drive 1 ton dually but only paying for the price of a stripped down regular cab 1/2 ton with no air or radio. because,.. some day you may need it but until you do you only want to pay for half of it.

Okay, so at least I'm not crazy and this is just very selfish on her part. She is making me feel like the bad guy - keeps saying "I'm reeeally trying to get this job permanently....you know, our kids are being raised together.......he really loves it here......etc"

[ninosqueridos]

"The only time some parents really appreciate a childcare provider is when they dont have one."

I love this.

[ninosqueridos]

Update

****UPDATE****

Just spoke with DCM and offered her to start f/t with dcb on 10/4 if deposit paid by 1 wk from today....or else spot would be open to anyone else. She seemed quite understanding about it actually and will give me her decision on Monday (after talking to her MIL this weekend ).

[Unregistered]

Okay, so at least I'm not crazy and this is just very selfish on her part. She is making me feel like the bad guy - keeps saying "I'm reeeally trying to get this job permanently....you know, our kids are being raised together.......he really loves it here......etc"

I would just respond, "Oh, I know! I love having little Johnny here and I feel just awful that I can't afford to keep his spot open until we see if your temp job works out. I hope you can figure out a way to pay for his spot and keep him here. I'd hate to lose him! "

When parents make this kind of request, I don't think they're being selfish so much as they just don't understand how our business works and they haven't thought through what it is they're asking us to do - although "Jennifer" may be the exception! ;-) I usually just explain that what they are essentially asking me to do is to hold their spot open for them without being paid for it and unfortunately, I can't afford to do that for them even though I'd love to be able to. The light bulb usually goes on at that point but if it doesn't, I explain that I really can't, in good conscience, interview with a family who thinks I have a spot open only to turn around and tell them it's not open after all. And... not that she would do this (of course not!).... but what's to keep her from deciding not to pay for the spot once I've sent that family away?