Saga Continues- Late DCM, I Wasn't Home..... :) She Wants To End Care...

[youretooloud]

This all translates into "I just don't understand why you can't just work on OUR schedule with OUR needs and what WE want." with ZERO regard to the fact that you have other families in care.

Sounds to me like this family simply needs a nanny or someone who at least considers themselves an employee of theirs.

Every provider is different. I wouldn't care what time they came. We would always be here because I don't have even a single carseat. So, they get here when they get here.

That doesn't mean I will wait to start preschool or cirlce time. If they miss it, they miss it. I won't make another meal, or get a project out again if they miss it. But, I don't need anybody here by a certain time.

[Blackcat31]

Every provider is different. I wouldn't care what time they came. We would always be here because I don't have even a single carseat. So, they get here when they get here.

That doesn't mean I will wait to start preschool or cirlce time. If they miss it, they miss it. I won't make another meal, or get a project out again if they miss it. But, I don't need anybody here by a certain time.

I am by NO means saying every provider must do things in a certain way.

I was replying in response to OP's specific situation as she has clearly been over and over her policies with this parent so the daycare parent knew FULL well what the OP expected of her BEFORE enrolling.

I don't care what time someone gets here either as I don't usually go anywhere but not calling when they are suppose to according to the OP's rules is blatantly disrespectful and rude IMHO.

If OP hadn't been over this issue with parent before and had never said anything about being on time before, I would never have said what I did.

[WImom]

Every provider is different. I wouldn't care what time they came. We would always be here because I don't have even a single carseat. So, they get here when they get here.

That doesn't mean I will wait to start preschool or cirlce time. If they miss it, they miss it. I won't make another meal, or get a project out again if they miss it. But, I don't need anybody here by a certain time.

I'm the same way except I do ask that they not arrive between 8:30-9:00 since that is our circle time/group time and it's disruptive. But of course I have one family that at least once a week is here at 8:40 or so. There is always one, right?

I find it so rude when parents don't call when late.

[LaLa1923]

Every provider is different. I wouldn't care what time they came. We would always be here because I don't have even a single carseat. So, they get here when they get here.

That doesn't mean I will wait to start preschool or cirlce time. If they miss it, they miss it. I won't make another meal, or get a project out again if they miss it. But, I don't need anybody here by a certain time.

It was necessary for me to do this bc there's a huge lack of communication, they just show up. Also, DCG is super high needs. you must be holding her or playing with only her or she just cries...

If she were laid back and did fine with an inconsistent schedule it would be one thing.. but she really needs routine....


I do think they need a nanny or something.

[MarinaVanessa]

It was necessary for me to do this bc there's a huge lack of communication, they just show up. Also, DCG is super high needs. you must be holding her or playing with only her or she just cries...

If she were laid back and did fine with an inconsistent schedule it would be one thing.. but she really needs routine....


I do think they need a nanny or something.

I thin k you did the right thing for you and I think that the DCM is doing the right thing for her. Neither is wrong, your needs just don't mesh.

My response would have been "I understand. By no means do I have ill feelings towards you or your daughter. You simply need something that I don't offer. It's understandable that you look for care that can be more accommodating to your needs."

"As a reminder, I require a written notice of termination with one month advance notice. As you know this period is paid and your child of course can attend during this time. If you choose to, you can decide not to have her come here anymore however the time during the one month period must still be paid whether she comes or not..." blah blah blah.

[Heidi]

I thin k you did the right thing for you and I think that the DCM is doing the right thing for her. Neither is wrong, your needs just don't mesh.

My response would have been "I understand. By no means do I have ill feelings towards you or your daughter. You simply need something that I don't offer. It's understandable that you look for care that can be more accommodating to your needs."

"As a reminder, I require a written notice of termination with one month advance notice. As you know this period is paid and your child of course can attend during this time. If you choose to, you can decide not to have her come here anymore however the time during the one month period must still be paid whether she comes or not..." blah blah blah.

professional, kind, and to-the-point...

[countrymom]

lets look at it this way, if she had a real job, do you think her boss would let her come when she wanted to, do you think he would hold the meetings till the mother came, I expect the same respect. If you are contracted for such and such a time then I expect you to come.

[Crystal]

I understand your frustration, however I do think it is unprofessional to just leave, especially considering that you probably knew she would show up. While I would "want" to teach her a lesson too, I would not do it just because I wouldn't want ANYONE to consider me to not be professional.

I would have called her, told her of my intention to leave, gave her 10 minutes to arrive and THEN left.

[Country Kids]

I understand your frustration, however I do think it is unprofessional to just leave, especially considering that you probably knew she would show up. While I would "want" to teach her a lesson too, I would not do it just because I wouldn't want ANYONE to consider me to not be professional.

I would have called her, told her of my intention to leave, gave her 10 minutes to arrive and THEN left.

Would her boss call her if she was running late? I'm sure if the school isn't going to wait/call if they are trying to go on a field trip, go into another classroom, library, music, etc.

I know a center wouldn't call if they were needing to leave for a field trip.

How many times do we say "don't wait for parents, just leave!" I have seen that quoted sooooo many times on here. Why would this thread be any different?

[LaLa1923]

I understand your frustration, however I do think it is unprofessional to just leave, especially considering that you probably knew she would show up. While I would "want" to teach her a lesson too, I would not do it just because I wouldn't want ANYONE to consider me to not be professional.

I would have called her, told her of my intention to leave, gave her 10 minutes to arrive and THEN left.

I didn't do it to teach her a lesson. I had an emergency and I had to go. She has called or texted lots of times after 9am to tell me she is not coming. I don't think it's my responsibility to contact her, I've got other littles to care for....

[MarinaVanessa]

I didn't do it to teach her a lesson. I had an emergency and I had to go. She has called or texted lots of times after 9am to tell me she is not coming. I don't think it's my responsibility to contact her, I've got other littles to care for....

Maybe for your next handbook you can add something about this to your policies. I do, that way all of my clients are aware that we go out multiple times each day and I do not wait for any parents on these days. If I need to leave I will leave. I do however give all of my clients a list of the times that I leave and when I am back by and if something "comes up" I do alert them all (the ones scheduled to come for the day anyway so that they know that I am leaving with their child (if they are already in the daycare) etc.

In any case in your situation you did have an emergency and had to leave, it's not like you left on purpose BECAUSE she did not show up on time. Parent's will always have their own opinions of whether or not you were professional or not regardless whether or not you actually were professional. I am not however surprised that the client is choosing to leave, it's a risk you take.

[kathiemarie]

I didn't do it to teach her a lesson. I had an emergency and I had to go. She has called or texted lots of times after 9am to tell me she is not coming. I don't think it's my responsibility to contact her, I've got other littles to care for....

In this case it was your responsibility to contact her. Your leaving was out of the norm. You should have called her to tell her you had to leave and how long you would be gone. Respect in a 2 way street.

[Luna]

[/B]

In this case it was your responsibility to contact her. Your leaving was out of the norm. You should have called her to tell her you had to leave and how long you would be gone. Respect in a 2 way street.

I disagree. I probably would have left a note on the door if I had time, but no, I don't think I'd call them. There was a good chance they weren't coming at all, as had happened in the past. They owed the provider a phone call or text, not the other way around. I would be relieved to be done with this family.

[cheerfuldom]

OP, whats done is done, no sense rehashing every detail and worrying about "woulda, coulda, shoulda". Just take what you can from the experience and go from there. Tighter policies that are enforced consistently always helps. I have a cut off time for morning dropoffs. I also leave if I need to and parents that do not communicate well are left at the door alone. I have their agree on times in the contract and that is what I plan around. Anyway changes on their schedules need to be communicated to me, I dont chase them around or wait for them. They also cant expect to text with little to no warning and expect me to be available. all this is clear on enrolling and if I have to tick someone off or leave them, then so be it. I have and continue to do that if necessary. Dont let others providers here make you feel bad. You did what you did, you cant change that. Again, just take a look at this situation when you are calm and have a little distance from it and see what you can use as a learning experience. If this parent needs a super flexible provider that is always available for her, then you arent the right person. Centers have other staff and someone IS always there during the open hours but you cant offer that. Thats fine. just let her move on and find someone else thats a better fit for your care

[Cradle2crayons]

If I have to leave unexpectedly, I always contact via text etc. of course, I always require a text when parents are 10 minutes or so out so i can secure my dogs because we have a 200 yd driveway. Also because my driveway is one way only and if two parents meet one HAS to back out which is very dangerous. So I've never had the same problem as you have had.