Things Kids Say....

[bunnyslippers]

Years ago, when I was MUCH thinner...pre-baby years...

I was working in an integrated preschool, and had just bent over to pick something up. I unknowingly exposed the top straps of my super-sexy g-string underpants (I know, bad bad bad style mistake - oops).

Later, a little girl in my class whispered "Miss....I think you may need to get some new underpants. The pretty pink ones you have on look like they are a little too small. I think I saw some of your bum-bum cheekies."

Horrified, but still one of my favorite stories!!!

[Meeko]

They write funny things too........

My sister in law is a teacher. She was teaching her class about elasticity and they stretched a pair of pantyhose across the room to see how far they would stretch.

In the UK, pantyhose are called tights.

One child wrote in his school journal "Today we stretched Mrs. Jenkins tights across the room"

Unfortunately he spelled "tights" as ....... "tits" ::

[coolconfidentme]

ME: Shut the door when you go to the bathroom, I don't want to watch you.
DCB: If I was bigger like mommy's boyfriend would you? She likes it.

[jenn]

I used to teach kindergarten. We had a big graduation ceremony at the end of the year with all 3 classes. We were getting ready to start and the auditorium was full (about 90 kids, plus their families and all the school staff). One of my boys was running late. His dad and dad's girlfriend followed behind as he ran through the doors yelling "Sorry I'm late, but my dad's girlfriend couldn't find all of her clothes." They were mortified.

[Lyss]

DCG(3) on the way out the door with preggo DCM: "Mom is your butt pregnant too? Its big" ::::

DCG(4): "My mom got a new job"
Me: "Wow I bet that's exciting for her!"
DCG: "DCD says its about time she tried something because Facebook isn't a job" (DCPs are divorced)
Me: "..."
DCG: "she talk to people on the phone and helps them clean their house but it might be hard I think because daddy says she's trashy"

Same DCG ^
I missed how this started just caught the tail end...
DCG: "DCD's GF is just his friend "
DCB(3): "Oh, she just has playdates with your dad?" ::
DCG: "well she gets to live with us but mommy says it won't be for long because daddy doesn't have the attention span for a 'lationship"

neighborhood kid: "Hi, I'm Johnny! I live over there with my mom"
Me: "That's nice, I bet you have lots of fun living there"
neighborhood kid: "yeah, but my dad's a deadbeat so he lives in jail. Can I go play in your back yard?"

[SilverSabre25]

Kids are awesome. My 4y11mo dcb was saying the other day that ducks turn into bones, which turn into mashed potatoes. :confused: okay dcb, you just go ahead and um, think that.


this one has me going

ME: Shut the door when you go to the bathroom, I don't want to watch you.
DCB: If I was bigger like mommy's boyfriend would you? She likes it.

[Patches]

My first day interning in a kindergaten class...
Lining up to go outside. Little boy noticed that his shoe was untied and bent over to tie it. The little boy behind him decided to kick him right between the legs. The first little boy stood straight up, turned around and yelled, "Miss ____! He just kicked me in the testicles!"::::

[TheGoodLife]

They write funny things too........

My sister in law is a teacher. She was teaching her class about elasticity and they stretched a pair of pantyhose across the room to see how far they would stretch.

In the UK, pantyhose are called tights.

One child wrote in his school journal "Today we stretched Mrs. Jenkins tights across the room"

Unfortunately he spelled "tights" as ....... "tits" ::

Oh, I can't stop laughing at this :::::: (As a teacher, I saw SO many funny spellings, but it's too late for me to even try to remember them now!)

[AmyLeigh]

I am loving this thread!

This happened today:

Me: DCG, be mindful of your cup, you don't want to spill your milk. (She kept turning around in her chair and nearly knocked it off a couple of times)
DD(age 4 going on 11): Actually, it's water.
Me: Actually, it's milk. I know, I filled it for her.
DD: Oh. Awwwkwaaard.

I think she's been watching too many tween Disney shows with her big sis!

This is my all time favorite from last summer (I think I posted it):

DCB age 5, gets on the swing, turns to look at the swing and then says, "Does this make my butt look big?" ::::::

[e.j.]

They write funny things too........

My sister in law is a teacher. She was teaching her class about elasticity and they stretched a pair of pantyhose across the room to see how far they would stretch.

In the UK, pantyhose are called tights.

One child wrote in his school journal "Today we stretched Mrs. Jenkins tights across the room"

Unfortunately he spelled "tights" as ....... "tits" ::

I read this 5 minutes ago and I'm still laughing!

When my niece was little, she was enrolled in my day care. She and my dd are only a month apart in age and usually got along great together. Once in awhile, one would get under the other's skin, though, and one day, they started fighting over a toy they both wanted. I was busy feeding one of my infants so I was trying to talk to the girls but they were so busy arguing, they weren't listening to me. One thing led to another and the next thing I knew, my dd stood next to me saying, "Mom, J is acting like an idiot!!" I started to reprimand my dd for calling her cousin an idiot but before I could get two words out of my mouth, my niece responded with, "But Auntie! I'm not acting!!" I tried so hard not to laugh but... 15 years later and it still makes me laugh.