Crying Girl...

[MissAnn]

Not crying, but screaming at drop off. She just turned 4. She has been here for a year. She has always been a nervous type child. Took her a long time to get comfortable here. Now she is coming in the morning crying. Mom said she's like this whenever she needs to separate from her. It's not just a school thing. This morning she had to pry little one off of her and I hugged her while mom left. The little girl screamed and wanted to go to the window to wave goodbye. I told her that she needs to dry up first (knowing she would)....she did and went to the window. I know kids go through these things, but I've never had a screamer. Little one is fine the rest of the day....joins in and plays as soon as mom leaves. Mom is upset because this is happening constantly at home. She said she was screaming and crying for an hour before coming here. Well, my first thought is.....you should have just brought her here. The screaming worked because mom brought her an hour later than usual. I told mom she should stick to her guns and bring her at regular time and not overtalk the situation with her dd.

Thoughts? Advice?

[AmyKidsCo]

Obviously the screaming is getting the child something that she wants or she wouldn't be doing it. I agree that mom should have brought her right away despite the screaming - by not doing so she's teaching the girl that if she screams long/loud enough she'll get her way.

[MNMum]

Not crying, but screaming at drop off. She just turned 4. She has been here for a year. She has always been a nervous type child. Took her a long time to get comfortable here. Now she is coming in the morning crying. Mom said she's like this whenever she needs to separate from her. It's not just a school thing. This morning she had to pry little one off of her and I hugged her while mom left. The little girl screamed and wanted to go to the window to wave goodbye. I told her that she needs to dry up first (knowing she would)....she did and went to the window. I know kids go through these things, but I've never had a screamer. Little one is fine the rest of the day....joins in and plays as soon as mom leaves. Mom is upset because this is happening constantly at home. She said she was screaming and crying for an hour before coming here. Well, my first thought is.....you should have just brought her here. The screaming worked because mom brought her an hour later than usual. I told mom she should stick to her guns and bring her at regular time and not overtalk the situation with her dd.

Thoughts? Advice?

You hit the nail on the head here. She is a smart kid. She wants to be with mom. Crying gets her what she wants longer. I have one of these that is 2. She only cries when mom drops her off (one morning per week). With dad she comes in smiling. Dad has never let crying bother him. She learned that with Dad it's not going to work. With mom, that's a different story. This morning when mom started letting this drag on, I walked back into my kitchen to let her deal with it. I came back a few minutes later, then the toddler started crying again. Mom was about to restart the routine. I took the toddler by her hand and walked her away, and said "Have a good day Mom", crying was done in 30 seconds.