Hygiene Rules

[HomeMADE]

I have a 4 month old baby boy that has been with me since 9 weeks old. I am finding that the mom, single mom, seems to either not know basic hygiene for him or not bathing him regularly.

She works very early in the morning and her mother drops him off and she picks up, so I am not sure if the timing has anything to do with it, but he smells sour. Someone in the house smokes, and he has one of the worst cases of cradle cap I have ever seen. The poor baby never smells like a baby.

I have suggested different things for the cradle cap that would clear it up easily. But they have not taken my advice. I sponge bath him because at times I can't stand the smell to hold him. I do most of his grooming, nail cutting, fingers and toes. cleaning his ears, which should be just wiped out with the wash cloth when he gets a bath.

They never bring him dressed. Not saying that he needs clothes and shoes, but I don't think he should spend 24 hours in the same pj set. She sends him to me in his pj's with clothes in the diaper bag. This seems weird to me, I never did that with any of my kids, especially as infants. I made sure they were ready for the day with spare clothes.

How do I go about talking to her about this. Should I even bring it up? Or should I just give him a full on bath when he reaks?

[AmyKidsCo]

Poor baby. Maybe she never learned basic baby hygiene? Is there a way you can gently lend her a book that will tell her what she needs to know?

[Hazel]

That's a tough one.. I've had kids come that were ready for a photo shoot everyday and others that come with clothes that are too small, smell like a musty basement and have dirty fingernails. one girl who was always clean still had neglected fingernails... So I just trimmed them. Her mom was greatful!

Everyone has a different idea do how often to bathe our children. My MIL is crazy about it and I've been told she bathed her kids EVERY DAY, needed or not. I'm a bit more lazy about it and only make my kids bathe every OTHER day unless they are particularly dirty after playing.

I mean, how do you tell a mom that her baby smells without offending her?
I PERSONALLY would just give him a bath when it's bad... Even just a sponge bath. Ask if you could do the treatment for the cradle cap saying that maybe it needs extra treatments from what she does at home...

Maybe some lavender baby lotion used in a massage to help cover the smelly clothes? Most babies LOVE light massage! And the lavender will be soothing!

[Starburst]

I would personally put in my contract (if not already there) that children need to be "ready for the day everyday by drop off time", and that includes that they are properly bathed and if they are not ready they will not be allowed in the door. Smelling like smoke for me personally would be a big NO-NO becuase I have asthma and that smell makes me sick- also because my hair is very thick and asorbs the smell of smoke very easily (I have just walked by on a side walk were someone was smoking and my hair smelt like it for hours). I would tell them "this is a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd hand smoke free program" and while I cannot tell them they cannot smoke at home or smoke at all I can tell them that I will not allow smoking on my property, or allow children that smell like smoke in my program.

Also in my state it is illeagal for adults to smoke in a car if there is a child under the age of 18 in the car- if the same is in your state I would remind them of that (they may not smoke in the house but they might smoke in the car on the way to daycare) and remind them that you are a mandated reporter you need to report any major potential hazards to the child's health or well being such as not properly cleaning/grooming them (can be a sign of neglect) or smoking around them (exposing them to environmental hazards). They may leave but at least you would be standing your ground. Your job is to make sure all the children in your care are as safe as they can be, and it takes alot of time out of your schedule to properly care for everyone if you are too busy grooming him because his family isn't and also if he smells like smoke all day he is exposing the children to 3rd hand smoke.

[Starburst]

Everyone has a different idea do how often to bathe our children. My MIL is crazy about it and I've been told she bathed her kids EVERY DAY, needed or not. I'm a bit more lazy about it and only make my kids bathe every OTHER day unless they are particularly dirty after playing.

I actualy heard that its a good thing to not wash them everyday. I heard some mild types of craddle cap or skin rashes can be cause by washing them too much- because it dries out the skin causing it to become dry and flakey. I personally would also wash them every other day but probably clean around some areas like the face, pits, limb folds, or groin more often (as needed) with a baby wipe or a damp towel.

[HomeMADE]

I totally agree and understand that everyone has different degrees of clean is or how dirty is dirty. I was personally told that babies should not be bathed everyday that it was drying to their skin. I guess I will just continue to bath him and see how it goes.

[ksmith]

As hard as it may be, I would address it with her. She may get offended, or she may just really have no idea. But no baby should get to the point where they have a foul odor. Poor hygiene is a form of neglect. I would definitely make sure its in your contract as well.

[LaLa1923]

I have always bathed my kids every day. Especially when they were babies. It has always been a part of their routine. I would just be honest with the mom.