Just For Fun: (Rant) Parents Posting Children's Tantrums (And 1 Funny Video)

[Starburst]

So I was looking up set up ideas for daycare set ups on youtube and some how came across these videos of parents posting video of their kid's online. Is this some new trend that parents think it is either funny or that people will think they are great parents if they post their kids tantrums online? Do they tell their kids "You better behave or I will post your tantrums online so the whole world will think you are a brat?" Some of them are just painful to watch not because the child is crying but because the parents are NOT DOING ANYTHING! I understand that ignoring negative behavior can be an effective tool in discouraging negative behavior but if this is their idea of ignoring the behavior it is very poorly executed. It's like "Hello! CAMERA= ATTENTION! If you are ignoring the behavior you shouldn't record it, they can see the camera!" if you record it why would you post it for the whole world to see? Do they want the whole world to label their chilren as "spoiled brats who need to be beaten" (some of the jist of the comments on the feed) based on one video of the child that know they may have teachers or friends who find these years later and judge them on this one insident. Isn't this a form of humiliation? When kids do things like this it is called ''cyberbullying'', but when adults do it its called "parenting"? Most of the comments on these things are about labling the child as spoiled or a brat and saying the parents should beat the child but what about the parent? I know we don't know the history of what led up to this or what the parent has tried and I am not saying they are bad parents but they made some very poor dicicions. 1- recording it to begin with, 2- not using appropriate disipline, 3- posting it online.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmUBB71k_U8

*This one really makes me sad for the little girl It may be a 'stupid' reason to the mom but its important to her and the mom is just mocking it and not validating her feelings. Yes there is nothing that can be changed about her age at that time but calling it the "stupidest tantrum ever" in front of her is really cold and inappropriate. Also, I do NOT even count this as a tantrum, a meltdown maybe but not a tantrum. I see a tantrum more as a child displaying uncontrollable behaviors such as hurting people, breaking things, or screaming their heads off. She is just crying because she is upset. There is no back story to what caused this maybe she has a friend who is turning/turned 4 or her friends are 4 so she feels left out or something. If the mom thinks this is a tantrum either the little girl doesn't have very many tantrums or she has never seen a real 3 year old tantrum.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IM1p-Tn-jA

* Maybe you should stop recording it and start parenting. And what is up with the passive remarks "No....don't... put it back... grandmas getting you a toy" from like 5 feet away! Kids see right through that and they know they can take advantage of it. Dont be afraid to guide (AKA be a parent) in public! Go up to them get to their eye level and tell them in a firm voice "We are not getting it. Put it back now." And if they don't, take it from them and put it back on the shelf! If they start to throw another tantrum, go outside and put them in time out or go home.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-G1sY_XWu0

*This is just a suggestion, but have you ever thought she is acting this way because she WANTS ATTENTION! I honestly do NOT blame the kid for this tantrum in this case. Maybe she wants you to get off your lazy butts and play with her, instead of just sitting there watching soccer and by recording it you are giving her attention even though you think you are "ignoring" her behavior.

This one I think is a random stranger:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jf9MM49qgIQ

* Okay this kid is way too old to get away with acting this way. But this guy had no right to put this on youtube.

I know I am not a parent and I dont know the real stories behind these are or what happened after and I shouldn't judge them on this but some of it is just like "What is going on in the parents heads to think that this will make their kids behave better? Or do you just think it is funny that you cannot control your own child?" IMHO, If they didn't want to be critiqued they shouldn't have posted the videos for the world to see. I also find it interesting that they have no problem showing their kid's faces but yet don't show their own faces so maybe they are embarrassed . Okay enough of my rants.

• What are some of your thoughts on this (the videos and/or the topic)? Is this type of punishment crossing the line? If not what would be crossing the line?
• What would you do if you found out one of your daycare parents did this to their child? (terminate/probation/warning, express your concerns, report them for exploitation/humiliation, ignore it)
• What if you found out when you went to the store and you child had a tantrum and someone recorded it and posted it online (some people do that too)?

****************************************************
Okay this one isn't about kids its more of the 'Just for Fun' but we have gotten into issues on grusome fair tales before (a very popular and sensitive topic apparently ). So I saw this video and it was just so funny. Its about what really happened to 4 of the disney Princesses after their "happily ever after" using real life history examples. I just think it's cool that he put all of videos together to be in perfect sinc with each other. And yes, I do have a bit of a sick sense of humor, so if this offends anyone sorry but I personally think it is funny- and for the record no I do not think it is appropriate for younger children.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diU70KshcjA

[Patches]

Ok, for the 2nd video. GET OUT OF THE TOY AISLE!!! And then he says "we'll get a toy at the front of the store" :confused: Really??

The Disney princess video was HILARIOUS!!:::: And I couldn't stop thinking about how wel it was put together.

[blandino]

I love the Disney princess video.

Other than that, I think the parenting that is happening in all the videos is really embarrassing. The 3/4 year old debate is the only one where the parent even attempts to speak to the child in a relatively authoritative manner or even a manner that would talk them through the fit and help them.

[daycarediva]

This one I think is a random stranger:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jf9MM49qgIQ

* Okay this kid is way too old to get away with acting this way. But this guy had no right to put this on youtube.

Yes, he is 'way too old to be acting that way' he may also have sensory processing disorder, or ASD, he might be huge for his age (I have a 3yo in care about his size) or he might just be a spoiled little brat.

[daycarediva]

The stupidest tantrum ever Mom could have completely avoided that situation by telling her child how many months until she turned 4, asking her how big she will be when she is 4, etc.... telling her that her feelings are STUPID isn't really helpful. It is teaching her NOTHING and certainly not that she can talk to her Mom about how she feels.

[daycarediva]

I don't walk down the toy aisle in walmart unless we are BUYING something, that helps. I would have praised the heck outta the cutie in the Taz shirt who put the toy down, and would have NOT been bribing the girl with 'a toy at the front of the store'


Everyday I see parenting that makes me CRINGE. I try very hard NOT to judge parents/kids based on those little examples that I see.

[Willow]

I was going to ask if you have kids but then I saw you mention you don't yet

If you think someday when you do have kids that you will be able to control them 100% of the time I think you are in for a rude awakening, but best of luck trying ::

Videoing/taking pictures of kids acting ridiculous isn't anything new nor is it bullying or cruel. Most parents do it. It's needed comedic relief to survive the day to day rollercoaster parents have to weather with their kids. No kid is perfect every single day no matter how well you raise them, I know if I threaten to pull out my phone to snap a picture or take some video of my kids doing something ridiculous it's a FANTASTIC motivator for them to stop right then and there. I have a mini-album of such pictures in their baby books, we look back on them often and crack up over them together.

The first video was HILARIOUS!!!!! Kids make the biggest deal out of some of the most ridiculous ideas. It isn't about a lack of validating her, it's about teaching her something like that isn't worth validating via coddling. I think way too many kids today lack a sense of humor. Mom was attentive, tried to help her solve her "major" dilemma but otherwise just recorded real life. Gave mom a giggle to show dad later I'm sure, and someday that girl will laugh about it too and probably show her kids when they start acting just as ridiculous.

The second one is obnoxious, but frankly I'm more irritated that dad seemed to have set them up and then disrespected the stores merchandise in front of them. I've seen far faaaaaaar worse just in the last week

If that was my child in the third one I'd have peed myself laughing at them. Sorry, but it was so silly I couldn't help but giggle, especially when she was bouncing herself off the bed. My pug does something similar when he wants to get up but can't quite make it. We call it his "pings." I'd probably make a pug face at them which would cause them to crack up, at which point the tantrum would be over.

I'm with daycarediva on the last one - seems like there is something other than just a tantrum going on there.....you think it's a random stranger recording it, but certainly don't know for sure. There seemed to be many family members there, that could have been just another. There may indeed have been a purpose for the recording. Perhaps to show his therapist so they have insight into his behaviors out in public? It's best not to judge if you have no idea.



Parenting is 24/7/365. If we didn't find ways to laugh through the tough, ugly, frustrating and pull our hair out moments none of us would survive it.

It's really no big deal, especially not knowing each of the individual circumstances. It's not bad parenting. It's certainly not reportable. If someone recorded my kid I'd wonder why and simply ask that the video be deleted or removed because it would be creepy, but that's about it.



(I don't understand the need for the eye rolling when discussing the fairy tale topic. People had different opinions, there's no need to be disrespectful or snotty about that.....)

[Lyss]

As a kid I remember watching kids throw tantrums on shows like America's Home videos and so on so I don't think this is anything new.

Like you said there is "there is no back story" to any of the videos. Every time I see these situations online/in-store I always remember this skit done by a comedian (I wish I could remember who it was : where he talked about how you never see the what happened before the tantrum, (offering options, rewards, bribes...), we just see the screaming/crying child and then assume its poor parenting or an unruly child.

I'm not even going to watch them honestly, like when I see them in public I prefer to walk away and not judge them. Who knows if that's normal behavior for that kid or a one time thing. Either way just because I have kids and work with kids doesn't mean I am in a place to judge the parents, every child (and parent) is different.

Parenting is 24/7/365. If we didn't find ways to laugh through the tough, ugly, frustrating and pull our hair out moments none of us would survive it.

I agree. It's not all giggles and heartwarming moments! There are many don't get me wrong, but there are some very challenging moments!! I love DD more than anything, but man does she (and DH : know how to push my buttons better than anyone!!

[Starburst]

If you think someday when you do have kids that you will be able to control them 100% of the time I think you are in for a rude awakening, but best of luck trying

Mom was attentive, tried to help her solve her "major" dilemma but otherwise just recorded real life. Gave mom a giggle to show dad later I'm sure, and someday that girl will laugh about it too and probably show her kids when they start acting just as ridiculous.

I'm with daycarediva on the last one - seems like there is something other than just a tantrum going on there.....you think it's a random stranger recording it, but certainly don't know for sure.

(I don't understand the need for the eye rolling when discussing the fairy tale topic. People had different opinions, there's no need to be disrespectful or snotty about that.....)

I am not saying that I will 100% be able to control my kids, but I would definatly respect my kids enough not to post their embarrassing or emotional moments online for everyone to see and judge them. That is the main problem I have with this- I see it as a form of public humiliation.

I doubt posting it online will help the little girl see how funny it is. Yes there is nothing that can be done other than time but the mom isn't validating her feelings by calling it "stupid". If she sent it to the dad or a family member privatly, that is one thing but posting it online and she didn't even have the b@!!s to leave the comments open- she probably closed them because people thought it was mean that she was making fun of her kid.

The last kid video was in fact recorded by a stranger because if you read the inscription under the video by the poster he said he just saw it when he went to the store.

I wasn't trying to be disrespectful to you or 'snotty'. I was rolling my eyes at myself because before that thread I never realized how strongly I felt about fairy tales. It was a way of laughing at myself.

[Blackcat31]

I am not saying that I will 100% be able to control my kids, but I would definatly respect my kids enough not to post their embarrassing or emotional moments online for everyone to see and judge them. That is the main problem I have with this- I see it as a form of public humiliation.
I doubt posting it online will help the little girl see how funny it is. Yes there is nothing that can be done other than time but the mom isn't validating her feelings by calling it "stupid". If she sent it to the dad or a family member privatly, that is one thing but posting it online and she didn't even have the b@!!s to leave the comments open- she probably closed them because people thought it was mean that she was making fun of her kid.

The last kid video was in fact recorded by a stranger because if you read the inscription under the video by the poster he said he just saw it when he went to the store.

I wasn't trying to be disrespectful to you or 'snotty'. I was rolling my eyes at myself because before that thread I never realized how strongly I felt about fairy tales. It was a way of laughing at myself.

Personally, I think Facebook is a form of public humiliation for most people...

When I see some of the things people post on-line now days...... ya can't help but wonder what they were/are thinking. If at all.

Of course with shows like Honey Boo Boo, Teen Mom, Preacher's Daughter and similar shows being super popular right now, I guess you can't blame people.

[Willow]

Personally, I think Facebook is a form of public humiliation for most people...

Holy Martha's RIGHT???!


Starburst- I personally think that a child needs to be aware they're being humiliated for there to even be any potential for "damage."

And even then I think sometimes it's ok on some level if the child is being that level of obnoxious. I'm not sure if you pinterest but I totally jumped on board the "We Love Each Other" t-shirt bit to curb sibling bickering in my home. I photographed the first time I had mine wear it, and it was so effective that a few months later I haven't had to bust it out since. The picture is in their books. All I have to do is laugh out loud to myself reminiscing about it and they get the message that they're taking things too far.

I'd rather do that than spank, yell and scream, or allow them to continue to perpetuate chaos in our home.



Public degradation/humiliation is sometimes court ordered for people who do wrong in society. Why? Not necessarily because it's mean, but because it's effective. No one wants to scrub public toilets doing community service, stand holding a sign talking about how they stole, or defrauded their community, or pick up trash on the side of the highway in an orange jumpsuit. It's embarrassing! No one wants anyone to see them doing such a thing so they do what they need to do to hopefully never end up in that position in the public eye again.

Even if it's not a matter of justice a lot of times it's just plain funny. Don't like it, don't click on the videos or photographs.

If it was that outrageous it wouldn't be so widely accepted by most of the population, for people of all ages.



eta - Americas Funniest Videos is the PERFECT example of this Lyss!!!!! There is nothing on that show that ISN'T "humiliation!!!!" ::

[AmyLeigh]

Ugghh...I couldn't finish any of those. I have a very low tolerance level for tantrums.

What I saw was the kids got more upset the more the parents talked to them about their issues. The were actually making the tantrums worse. In the first one, the girl was barely even still crying until mom got in her face about not being 4. In the second one, the girl was marginally upset, then when dad kept talking about it, she got more worked up. Made me mad. Just tell the child, "nope, you're not 4 yet, not getting a toy, not getting your way (whatever)" Then MOVE ON!!! Once the child sees that you are not making a big deal of it, the tantrums stop. And yes, I have had all 3 of my children throw tantrums in public. Once. They knew I was not going to give in. Tantrums stopped and never happened again. They learned really fast that mama don't play that. Tantrums are not funny, and videos of them are not funny at all.

I am very disturbed by the public posting of these videos. Not only does this not show any respect for their children (one of my biggest pet peeves), they are stupid enough to set themselves up to be criticized and judged by the public.
I did, however, enjoy the princess video!

[Starburst]

Public degradation/humiliation is sometimes court ordered for people who do wrong in society. Why? Not necessarily because it's mean, but because it's effective. No one wants to scrub public toilets doing community service, stand holding a sign talking about how they stole, or defrauded their community, or pick up trash on the side of the highway in an orange jumpsuit. It's embarrassing! No one wants anyone to see them doing such a thing so they do what they need to do to hopefully never end up in that position in the public eye again.

Yes but they were commiting crimes. I was watching "Taboo" when a judge did things like this and I agree it is effective and criminals shouldn't be allowed to hide behind bars annoynomusly and if someone did commmit a heinous crime like drinking and driving and it resulted in a death or accident, they should make them stand on the place the accident occured with a sign that said "I drank and drive... I hurt/killed an innocent person named (person's name) right here". But on Taboo they were also talking about the psychological aspects of it public humiliation and how it can lead to psychological and emotional issues such as paranoid personality disorder (fear people are 'out to get you'), violent/hostile outbursts, anxiety disorders, depression, and even suicidal thoughts (suicidal rates are right now at the highest average is in 4th graders [9 year olds] due to bullying from peers). That is why most places don't do it anymore, because it is considered cruel and unusual punishment and many say that it violates their rights as a human (though I admit it would save a lot of money on prisons and law enforcement). According to the NAEYC children's rights include to be free from humilition. Throwing a tantrum is not a crime (though it can be very annoying and many may wish it was).

[Lyss]

Did any of the parents tell their kids they were posting them online? It's not really a threat of humiliation unless you actually tell them, but like I said earlier I haven't watched them so I'm not sure what was said about posting it.

I also think kids now often have camera phone rolling in their faces so I don't think the camera itself would have been a threat to them IMO

Personally, I think Facebook is a form of public humiliation for most people...

When I see some of the things people post on-line now days...... ya can't help but wonder what they were/are thinking. If at all.

Of course with shows like Honey Boo Boo, Teen Mom, Preacher's Daughter and similar shows being super popular right now, I guess you can't blame people.

I totally agree! I think this is a major factor in why people post these videos on youtube! We live in a world of reality TV (from Survivor to Idol to housewives to freakshow and so on!) and Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, pinterest.... People post EVERYTHING online now days so why wouldn't they post the tantrum too? I've seen so many videos (nearly all from cell phone cameras) posted to FB of kids doing everything from fits to something cute, I even once saw a post "little Suzy pooped on the potty!!! See video!" ummm.... no thanks!

Its generation exposed! !

[Starburst]

I totally agree! I think this is a major factor in why people post these videos on youtube! We live in a world of reality TV (from Survivor to Idol to housewives to freakshow and so on!) and Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, pinterest.... People post EVERYTHING online now days so why wouldn't they post the tantrum too? I've seen so many videos (nearly all from cell phone cameras) posted to FB of kids doing everything from fits to cute thing, I even once saw a post "little Suzy pooped on the potty!!! See video!" ummm.... no thanks!

That is another debate to think about...

http://www.babble.com/baby/should-parents-post-naked-baby-pictures-online/

http://www.today.com/moms/sharing-cute-naked-photos-your-kids-online-just-dont-1B8219527

http://www.funadvice.com/q/feel_parents_post_naked_pictures_babies_social_networking_sites