OT- Since We Were Talking About The Goverment Earlier Lets Got To The State

[Candy]

I agree that yes there are many great people on waiting lists that span years but many of these extremely long waiting lists are for an infant or toddler. In 2011 46% of all the adoptions of children in foster care are under 4. There are many children in the system still that need help so its not untrue that they have way more children than adoptive parents. Its just an age that people are less like to want to adopt.

As someone that's been in and out of the system I can first hand agree with each of your comments that the system needs to be reworked. I had good and bad placements. I do firmly believe that there are more good foster parents than bad but there aren't enough. I would have preferred to stay in foster care, rather than my with my father, even though I repeatedly ended up with what we called "collectors" (multiple kids, $ most important but not terrible people in my case) but the ultimate goal of the system is reunification with biological family (parents or relatives) not adoption unless ultimately unavoidable. Thankfully my grandmother found dirt on my dad and blackmailed him into giving her custody (go nana!). I wish I could foster but at the moment we don't have the room, I do keep up on information and volunteer with advocacy agencies when I can.

I know in the area I grew up there is a major shortage of social workers because of funding, I was one of nearly 250 assigned to one case worker. Maybe if she had less kids to worry about and more resources to do her job my grandma wouldn't have had to be one the one digging up dirt.

Its just yet another government program that needs a major overall!

& RMC20021 I applaud your strength and fight. It's not an easy road

Did you tell your caseworker you didn't want to live with your dad or did she just ignore you?

[Lyss]

Did you tell your caseworker you didn't want to live with your dad or did she just ignore you?

Seriously? Maybe I'm just tired (or overly sensitive on this topic) and taking this comment wrong but don't think I sat quietly by waiting to see what happened. Even the first time at 6 I fought going back, I fought for myself every time. The first thing you learn in this system is you have to look out for yourself.

It wasn't a choice, I sure as heck didn't choose to go back or keep my mouth shut. Those heartwarming courtroom moments on tv and movies where the child gets to have a voice and pick where they live doesn't happen in these situations (or rarely if it does). Children in the system don't get to say where they go unless sitting in a courtroom with a mountain of evidence to suggest unfit parents. It wasn't up to my social worker either, she had an opinion but it was the judge who made the decisions. There was plenty of evidence in my cases, but not "enough" to warrant termination and once they took the required trainings, did time, and/or passed one or two drug tests they looked ok on paper. Reunification is the ultimate goal.

[Candy]

Seriously? Maybe I'm just tired (or overly sensitive on this topic) and taking this comment wrong but don't think I sat quietly by waiting to see what happened. Even the first time at 6 I fought going back, I fought for myself every time. The first thing you learn in this system is you have to look out for yourself.

It wasn't a choice, I sure as heck didn't choose to go back or keep my mouth shut. Those heartwarming courtroom moments on tv and movies where the child gets to have a voice and pick where they live doesn't happen in these situations (or rarely if it does). Children in the system don't get to say where they go unless sitting in a courtroom with a mountain of evidence to suggest unfit parents. It wasn't up to my social worker either, she had an opinion but it was the judge who made the decisions. There was plenty of evidence in my cases, but not "enough" to warrant termination and once they took the required trainings, did time, and/or passed one or two drug tests they looked ok on paper. Reunification is the ultimate goal.

I'm sorry i didn't mean it to rude. I was just curious if the caseworker or judge asked you what you wanted or did they just believe everything the parent says

[Lyss]

I'm sorry i didn't mean it to rude. I was just curious if the caseworker or judge asked you what you wanted or did they just believe everything the parent says

I understand, sorry if my response came off rude as well. Its just a hot button issue for me.

Realistically its about evidence backing up one story or the other. They need a paper trail (usually extremely long) of evidence and no hope of recovery before anything is done. But then each case worker (in my case anyway) is so swamped that they don't have enough time or resources to investigate in-depth which gives people time to cover their track or manipulate the system.

[BumbleBee]

I've experienced the Michigan system from the foster parent side as well.

Everything you wrote I 100% agree with. I was nodding my head and "mmmm-hmmmmm" ing the whole time.

Our system ****s.

I will never have a foster license again.

I have a license for both daycare and foster care...let me tell you it was MUCH harder getting the daycare licensing than the foster care license.

Most of it has nothing to do with the criminal records/checks or anything like that...it's stuff like furnace inspections, radon testing, etc. But it was much more involved.

I don't understand how it is so easy myself to become a licensed foster care provider when you have the kids in your complete control and care 24/7, compared to providing childcare for several hours per day in your home and then the kids leave to loving, caring, providing parents.

The sad thing is, even though it's so easy to get licensed as foster care (compared to daycare), it is no parade. WE have to do what the agencies tell us to do...we don't get the luxery of running our 'household's' the way we want, and honestly the subsidy payments (at least in Michigan) is totally not worth providing the care, and having to jump through the hoops of the agencies.

That is why there are so many foster parents who only do it for a short time (myself included) and the state is ALWAYS in need of more homes. I believe it's so easy to get the foster care licensing because there is such a shortage of foster care homes that they are a lot less strict.

I've been fostering for 4 years now, and I will tell you that there is probably no where you could go where you are lied to more (caseworkers trying to get you to take kids you would never take if you had known the truth about them to begin with. They will omit information and tell you all the wonderful things about the kids...forgetting the bad stuff until it's too late and they're in your home and THEN when you have to ask to have them removed, they will remind you they have 14 days (some states are 30 days) to move the child...even a 17 yo who they'd failed to tell you had just gotten out of jail the day they brought him to you and has a lengthy police record, and you catch him coming out of your 9 yo granddaughters bedroom in the middle of the night).

On one hand I understand the reasoning WHY they issue foster care licenses so easily (shortage of foster homes due the problems the system itself has created). On the other hand...I just don't get it when these kids are in our hands 24/7 and the agency doesn't do the things THEY are required to ensure the safety of the kids.

I've had to do my own investigations on my grandkids birth mom as the agency believed whatever she told them, wasn't going for drug screens and still getting visitations (they're not supposed to have visits if they test positive).

My grandkids were all set to go home on a Monday after we were to have court that day, when the Friday before I'd finally gotten all the proof I needed for the caseworker to proove to them that all the stuff I'd been telling them about birth mom all along was in fact true. That Friday the case plan was changed from reunification to guardianship...in the blink of an eye.

Had the caseworkers been doing their job, this case would never have gotten to where it was at that point. In the same sense, if the caseworkers, as well as the rest of the professionals involved in the foster care system, would do their jobs, and not be so quick to license just anybody, there would be so much less of all the bs that goes with fostering.

If they did their jobs properly, there would be less need for more foster homes than what's available because a lot of the parents rights would be terminated at a reasonable amount of time instead of dragging things out for several years, letting the parents get away with all their own lies and manipulations and move the kids on to safer living arrangements. MOST foster parents are wonderful, loving people who want nothing but whats best for the kdis and will adopt if given the chance. With adoption, the kids would no longer be in the foster system and that would free up beds in foster homes.

AS well, if the agencies and courts did their jobs properly, the end result would be less need for more foster homes, causing the licensing to become more strict.

Please do not think what i said portrays me as a heartless human being thinking every child who goes into foster care should be put up for adoption. I do not believe that. But what I have learned over the years, as most foster parents have, is that if the parents have not done what they are supposed to do in the first year at most, then it's not likely they are going to and the child should be released for adoption so their lives can become normal sooner rather than later.

Most people have no idea how long these poor kids languish in the foster care system not knowing from one day to the next where they might be in the morning, where they can call HOME.

In my grandkids case, both parents are drug addicts. You would not believe all the ways they can alter drug tests...I'm not taking anyone's word for this information. My son, a drug addict, whose kids lives have depended on him becoming clean, has told me himself about how he's beat the drug tests...and I did not hesitate to pass the info on to the caseworkers. He's my son, and I love him with my heart, but my priority is protecting the kids. This case has dragged out for over 5 years and the birth mom has gotten away with so much...no job, no stable place to live (always lives with someone else and when she does get a place to live, she gets evicted (6 times in 7 years) as well as continued drug use. She's incapable of caring for herself, much less kids. Her boyfriend was giving 16 yo grandson pot during their unsupervised visits.

I'm not only speaking from my own experiences, but from every foster parent I've ever met. The system stinks on so many levels, for everyone involved. Sorry for the rant...this has been a tough 5 years and it ain't over yet, never will be.

[Candy]

With over 200 cases im surprised they don't loose the folders. How are they suppose to keep up with that many kids. I wonder how many kids have been lost in the system because of this.