OT- When to Stop Nursing DS?

[EchoMom]

How long did you nurse your children?
Anyone intending to nurse long term?
How do you know when to end?

My DS is 18 months old and I've nurse him the whole time. He's never had a single drop of formula, and never even had a single bottle, it's always been just me. He still loves to nurse first thing in the morning and last thing at night. I never ever minded it, but lately I'm feeling pretty done with it. It's just getting annoying to me, and I'm sick of his tantrums for it.

But then when he asks so sweetly for "Chi chi" and points to his chest as his sign for it it melts my heart and I let him nurse. The bonding is nice and it's relaxing for both of us.

But, I also feel sick of it and would like to end it.
But I feel guilty. Like I'm robbing him of the benefits. But it's been 18 months already so I know he's already gotten a ton of benefits. Is there any more to be gained by continuing to 24 months?

Thoughts please?

[Lucy]

Oh, you'll get all variations of answers on this one. In my opinion, the only appropriate answer is:

Whenever you're comfortable stopping.

[blandino]

Okay, no one jump all over me - but I am just relaying information

My best friend is a RD, and she said that the 12 month breastfeeding studies are actually based off of the benefits of BF for 6 months. So I can only imagine that the studies that say 24 months are based off of something similar.

I think 18 months is an extremely commendable amount of time, and you should be proud. I would imagine that the repercussions of stopping now are very minimal - and most of the benefits have been gained already.

[EchoMom]

But how do I know when I'm comfortable stopping if I feel so conflicted about it?

For 16 months it was a no brainer, I loved it, DS loved it, but now after 18 months... It's getting old fast. But I don't want to rob him of added benefits if there are really any more to be had...

Blandino, thank you very much for saying that. I don't know why I feel so guilty about wanting to stop now. I just feel like I'd be robbing him or taking away something so special that he loves and is so good for him. But seriously, it's been a LONG time and I'd just like to have my body back for a little while before I get pregnant again sometime this year. And I'm such a ****er when he's asking for it!

[Lucy]

But how do I know when I'm comfortable stopping if I feel so conflicted about it?

For 16 months it was a no brainer, I loved it, DS loved it, but now after 18 months... It's getting old fast. But I don't want to rob him of added benefits if there are really any more to be had...

Blandino, thank you very much for saying that. I don't know why I feel so guilty about wanting to stop now. I just feel like I'd be robbing him or taking away something so special that he loves and is so good for him. But seriously, it's been a LONG time and I'd just like to have my body back for a little while before I get pregnant again sometime this year. And I'm such a ****er when he's asking for it!

Yes, I get what you're saying. And I don't mean to trivialize it. I just mean that this is a contentious topic that people feel very passionate about - whichever side they're on.

So I guess I'd say if you're starting to have negative feelings about it, maybe it's time to stop. But what do I know??

[Evansmom]

I bf'd both my boys, the first till he was 3.7 years and the second until he was 4 years 2 months and 29 days

So I'm biased bc I love "extended" breast feeding.

I suggest that you visit LLLI.org and ask this question on their forums if you can. I think you'd get some good help.

In my opinion tho from what you said it sounds like you are starting to get a little weary of your bfing relationship with your son. This is normal and you can cut back at his age without quitting totally. Since he's not fully dependent on breast milk for all his nutrition now it would be ok to set limits that you feel more comfortable with. Breastmilk does benefit toddlers with immunities so you may want to consider that too.

Some moms night wean, some day wean, some pick the most important sessions (morning, nap, night) and only say yes to those. Setting limits can help relieve your feelings of being done while still balancing his need to nurse. Since you both are in this nursing relationship it's important to honor both of you

It is ok to say no or distract a toddler when they ask to nurse. They may cry because it is sad, so acknowledge his feelings if this happens and then tell him when you will nurse (nap time, bed time, after lunch etc) it may take a while but he will adjust to the new routine.

I ended up day weaning at age 2 with my son but kept the wake up, nap and bedtime/night time sessions because those were most important to him. But during the day when the daycare kids were here it was easy to distract him. It helped me not feel so touched out and allowed us to keep nursing. I night weaned at age 3 and kept just wake up/nap/bed. Then we slowly weaned off of those. It was a very gentle end to our breast feeding relationship and I felt really good about that

[Evansmom]

Here is some info on the benefits of breast feeding toddlers and children.

http://kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/ebf-benefits/

[brittburk]

I've reached 1 year with my daughter. There are definitely times when I feel weary of it, especially the last week, we've both been stressed and not feeling great so she's been asking very frequently. It melts my heart to see her signing 'milk' though. I just tell myself that she's still getting tons of awesome out of it plus we're doing delayed/spaced vaccines to give her immune system time to breath between doses so to make sure she's extra protected I want to go at the very minimum two years.

I plan on extended BF, but only so long as she is comfortable. I think you're going to go through phases where you just want to bed done because it CAN get tedious. BUT at 18 months it is also possible to cut back considerably to 1-3 times a day and still have it work. So maybe you don't need to stop. Maybe if he's asking during the day offer water instead and reserve nursing until the evening and for waking up. I'm not sure what kind of frequency you have going on right now. :3

I also suggest talking to some LLL people, they will have advice and words of encouragement for whatever you decide. You are a rockstar for hitting 18 months already mama!

[MNMum]

There are definitely times when nursing a toddler becomes a bit of a chore. And other times that it is so touching. It is more than acceptable to teach your child manners when it comes to nursing. These can be whatever you choose. I.E., its okay to nurse before nap and bed and first thing in the morning, but not at other times. Or it's okay to nurse when at home but not in public. It's all about what you are comfortable with at this point.

There are benefits that your child will receive from you as long as you nurse. And you will continue to receive benefits for as long as you nurse. In fact the immune benefits become more concentrated as you milk supply decreases. Sometimes toddler nursing may cause a tantrum, but then at other times, it may curb a tantrum. Toddlers are learning to behave and be little people. Even if you stop nursing, your child will find something to have tantrums about .

I nursed my first until 15 mos. My second until about 33 mos. My third until about 27 mos. Towards the end with child number 2 and number 3, it was annoying and painful to nurse, as I had very little breast tissue left... With both, weaning happened when I went on a vacation without them. After a week, they had forgotten how to nurse. To be quite honest, my 2nd child gets sick less often than the other 2 (not a conclusive study, just something I've noticed). There were times when I wish I had nursed my son longer (third child), and I wondered whether it would have made things easier during his third year of life. But I don't live my life regretting going to Hawaii without the kids

Take it day by day, there doesn't need to be a decision to stop. Sometimes these things figure out their own way.

[MissAnn]

How long did you nurse your children?
Anyone intending to nurse long term?
How do you know when to end?

My DS is 18 months old and I've nurse him the whole time. He's never had a single drop of formula, and never even had a single bottle, it's always been just me. He still loves to nurse first thing in the morning and last thing at night. I never ever minded it, but lately I'm feeling pretty done with it. It's just getting annoying to me, and I'm sick of his tantrums for it.

But then when he asks so sweetly for "Chi chi" and points to his chest as his sign for it it melts my heart and I let him nurse. The bonding is nice and it's relaxing for both of us.

But, I also feel sick of it and would like to end it.
But I feel guilty. Like I'm robbing him of the benefits. But it's been 18 months already so I know he's already gotten a ton of benefits. Is there any more to be gained by continuing to 24 months?

Thoughts please?

Funny story. I nursed my son until he was two years old. One day came up to me to nurse, he tried then looked at me and said "there's none in there, I want a Coke", then marched off to the fridge!

I tried to nurse my daughter who is adopted. She was two months old when we adopted her so it didn't work.

I say nurse as long as you want.

[countrymom]

nurse as long as you want. I nursed my dd till she was 3. It was august and I couldn't stand another hot sweaty body touching me, so I called it quits. I do notice that dd is rarely sick, and dh always says that she's built like a brick sh*t house !!

[Springdaze]

Ann, now thats funny!

[Angelsj]

I bf'd both my boys, the first till he was 3.7 years and the second until he was 4 years 2 months and 29 days

So I'm biased bc I love "extended" breast feeding.

I suggest that you visit LLLI.org and ask this question on their forums if you can. I think you'd get some good help.

In my opinion tho from what you said it sounds like you are starting to get a little weary of your bfing relationship with your son. This is normal and you can cut back at his age without quitting totally. Since he's not fully dependent on breast milk for all his nutrition now it would be ok to set limits that you feel more comfortable with. Breastmilk does benefit toddlers with immunities so you may want to consider that too.

Some moms night wean, some day wean, some pick the most important sessions (morning, nap, night) and only say yes to those. Setting limits can help relieve your feelings of being done while still balancing his need to nurse. Since you both are in this nursing relationship it's important to honor both of you

It is ok to say no or distract a toddler when they ask to nurse. They may cry because it is sad, so acknowledge his feelings if this happens and then tell him when you will nurse (nap time, bed time, after lunch etc) it may take a while but he will adjust to the new routine.

I ended up day weaning at age 2 with my son but kept the wake up, nap and bedtime/night time sessions because those were most important to him. But during the day when the daycare kids were here it was easy to distract him. It helped me not feel so touched out and allowed us to keep nursing. I night weaned at age 3 and kept just wake up/nap/bed. Then we slowly weaned off of those. It was a very gentle end to our breast feeding relationship and I felt really good about that

This. There are definitely benefits to long term breastfeeding, so you are still giving him something. But it is also ok to put limits on it, perhaps nap and sleeptime only? If you are getting uncomfortable, you can help him find balance.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I'm having a baby in September and will nurse that child for at least 2 years (which is the MINIMUM recommendation from World Health Organization). Research has shown that a young child's brain continues to grow at a great rate up until the age of 5/6 so nursing as long as you can will greatly benefit them. Your milk will change for your child as they grow and age.

When you become completely touched out/resentful, that's usually a good time to slowly start weaning or slowing it down a bit.

[momofboys]

How long did you nurse your children? with my 3rd (&last) I nursed until he was about 13-14 months - I added more time with each of my little ones - 3 months with baby #1, 8 months with baby #2
My 3rd never had formula & I truly enjoyed the experience also, I think I got better at nursing with each child I had


How do you know when to end? Well I think it is hard to stop sometimes if you are devoted & it is difficuly because it signifies that your child is getting older/growing up. For me my child wouldn't cry if he didn't get to & had just moved on from that experience so it was easy to stop.