OT: Had To Call The Police And Family Services

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

My sister in law is struggling with depression and alcohol and called my hubby again while he was at work and started saying the same old thing, why dont you care about me, love me, I need help, etc, etc.

She has done this all her life but now it has become every month. He has tried numerous times to get her help.

He is frustrated with her, and im sure part of him doesnt understand how she truly feels.

I have struggled with depression since I was 15. But I know how to deal with it properly.

I called her this morning and she said that she was done, ready to end it all, tired of this feeling and cant find a way to feel better except for the booze.
She sounded pretty bad.
I know she isnt taking her meds properly, and that she should not be drinking while taking them.

The kicker? I then heard my 10yr old niece in the back ground. I asked her why she was home from school. She said she needs her here, so she is not alone.

I ended up calling cps and they told me to call the police.

So my niece has been removed and is at a friends house and my SIL is at the hospital.

I feel so bad, I couldnt even drive to the city to come get my niece. I know what I did was right, but now that this has happened so many times, we dont know what will happen to her. CPS said they will investigate what is happening and go from there, My niece's dad is in her life, but he is the type that has 5+ kids and could care less about any of them.

I told CPS that if she needs to be in a stable home, that we are the ones who can give her that.

I hope my hubby wont be too mad at me for butting in.

[MarinaVanessa]

I for one agree that I hope your hubby doesn't mind you butting in and I commend you for taking initiative and for offering to take your niece on while SIL gets help.

Hopefully things work out between all of you and SIL gets the help that she needs. Alcohol is a downer so drinking while you're on anti-depressants is not good at all. Mixing uppers and downers is not the way for your SIL to get a hold of her depression so I think you did the right thing, at least for your niece. Missing school because mommy needs a babysitter is not good for your niece at all .

[Kym2098]

I pray that your SIL gets the help she truly needs and all works out ok!

My sister in law is struggling with depression and alcohol and called my hubby again while he was at work and started saying the same old thing, why dont you care about me, love me, I need help, etc, etc.

She has done this all her life but now it has become every month. He has tried numerous times to get her help.

He is frustrated with her, and im sure part of him doesnt understand how she truly feels.

I have struggled with depression since I was 15. But I know how to deal with it properly.

I called her this morning and she said that she was done, ready to end it all, tired of this feeling and cant find a way to feel better except for the booze.
She sounded pretty bad.
I know she isnt taking her meds properly, and that she should not be drinking while taking them.

The kicker? I then heard my 10yr old niece in the back ground. I asked her why she was home from school. She said she needs her here, so she is not alone.

I ended up calling cps and they told me to call the police.

So my niece has been removed and is at a friends house and my SIL is at the hospital.

I feel so bad, I couldnt even drive to the city to come get my niece. I know what I did was right, but now that this has happened so many times, we dont know what will happen to her. CPS said they will investigate what is happening and go from there, My niece's dad is in her life, but he is the type that has 5+ kids and could care less about any of them.

I told CPS that if she needs to be in a stable home, that we are the ones who can give her that.

I hope my hubby wont be too mad at me for butting in.

[SilverSabre25]

I'm glad you're there for both your SIL and your niece. I wish all the best for everyone involved.

[rmc20021]

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE know you did not butt in...you did the right thing. I am also a licensed foster parent. I became licensed after my grandkids were removed from my son and DIL because of their drug addiction (prescription pain meds that got way out of control). Their lives went downhill before any of the family totally understood what had happened.

This story began 5 years ago. After the first year of cps following them around as they moved and ran from one place to another, they FINALLY removed the kids. EVERYONE thought it was going to be temporary and they would realize their mistakes and make things better. Hasn't happened. I don't know if the drugs have altered their brains so much they cannot parent their kids properly any more (my son was one of the best, hands on dad's anyone could ever know so I was sure he'd never put anything over his kids)

So, now, several years later and going through a h*** you wouldn't believe if you hadn't lived it, I realize just how bad the situation was. Guardianship will be assigned on the 19th of this month.

Once cps and the courts get involved it will be a roller coaster ride like none you've ever been on...but you have to do what you have to do to protect the kids and give them a chance at life. My grandson is almost 17 yo and if he had not come to me, he would no longer be in school, doing drugs and running the streets...there's no doubt about that as he had already begun that path when he came to me...with mom contributing to the problem by giving him cigarettes, and more recently pot (that was the final straw which made the plan of guardianship the permanent plan).

With all that being said, I'd never have wanted things to have gone any other way than to have had them removed from the home. I just wish their parents could have gotten their act together. And I believe with the situation your sil is in, it's for the best you did what you did. She will either get her act together and do what she needs to do to raise her kid(s) better, or she will continue doing what she's doing and the kid(s) will be in a better position to have a normal life.

I hope the sil gets her act together...kids need their parents, but they need them to be healthy. I hope your husband can understand you did the right thing. The foster agencies offer parents so much support and help...but it's up to the parents to take the help and do their part.

[jenn]

You did the right thing. Prayers that everything works out.

[Luna]

Your niece is lucky to have you in her life. You absolutely did the right thing, your husband must know that. :hug:

[bunnyslippers]

You did the right thing, and it took courage to do it! Thank you for caring for your family enough to do what needed to be done!

[melilley]

Butt in all you need to! One of my friends that I knew since third grade suffered with depression and also turned to alcohol. She ended up taking her own life almost 2 years ago. She didn't have any kids, but had nieces, family, and friends who loved and adored her. Maybe if someone who knew she was feeling the way she did and had butted in, she would still be here. I think you did the right thing! :hug:

[DaisyMamma]

You are very brave for doing that. I cant say I would've been brave enough myself, eventhough its the right thing to do. I can only imagine how hard it is for you.

[snbauser]

(((HUGS))) You did the right thing.

[My3cents]

My sister in law is struggling with depression and alcohol and called my hubby again while he was at work and started saying the same old thing, why dont you care about me, love me, I need help, etc, etc.

She has done this all her life but now it has become every month. He has tried numerous times to get her help.

He is frustrated with her, and im sure part of him doesnt understand how she truly feels.

I have struggled with depression since I was 15. But I know how to deal with it properly.

I called her this morning and she said that she was done, ready to end it all, tired of this feeling and cant find a way to feel better except for the booze.
She sounded pretty bad.
I know she isnt taking her meds properly, and that she should not be drinking while taking them.

The kicker? I then heard my 10yr old niece in the back ground. I asked her why she was home from school. She said she needs her here, so she is not alone.

I ended up calling cps and they told me to call the police.

So my niece has been removed and is at a friends house and my SIL is at the hospital.

I feel so bad, I couldnt even drive to the city to come get my niece. I know what I did was right, but now that this has happened so many times, we dont know what will happen to her. CPS said they will investigate what is happening and go from there, My niece's dad is in her life, but he is the type that has 5+ kids and could care less about any of them.

I told CPS that if she needs to be in a stable home, that we are the ones who can give her that.

I hope my hubby wont be too mad at me for butting in.

I feel you did what had to be done. Hugs :hug: Making that call is not something anyone with a brain would just randomly do. You thought this out and did what was best for the child. Not easy- Don't let your hubby give you any flack or put you down for doing the right thing.

You just may have saved her lifelovethis

:hug:

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

My husband is ok about what I did even though he feels it wont make any difference.

I talked to her last night and she still has no intentions of getting help, doesnt see any problems, And has pretty much put all the blame on us.

So, I guess the count down begins to see how many times she will continue to do this until CPS removes my niece from her care.

I know I did the right thing, and will continue until at least one of them gets the help they need.

Thanks so much everyone.