Balancing Act Family Life vs. Daycare Job

[HomeMADE]

This is the end of month 2 for me and all is well in Daycare land. I have great kids and great families. I seem to be having an issue with balancing the expectations that I have put on myself and what my family is used to.

Since I am home and I am making breakfast and lunch I usually make dinner for us during nap time along with cleaning. Not just the daycare areas but the entire house, bathrooms, make beds, wash clothes. All of this so that I can relax on the weekends.

I feel like I am going at 200mph during the week. I am so exhausted at the end of the night my head hits the pillow and it is time for the next day.

How do you do it all?

[lolaland]

I'm doing this for close to 5 years and I still can not balance the 2 things. My daycare is the entire apartment underneath my own apartment so during the 11 hours I spend in daycare I can't do nothing for my family/household... and those 11 hours in the daycare are pretty intense. So yes... I'm exhausted all the time. The only way I could balance it all was if my daycare hours were 6 to 8 hours... but that would make impossible to have families.

[Scout]

This is the end of month 2 for me and all is well in Daycare land. I have great kids and great families. I seem to be having an issue with balancing the expectations that I have put on myself and what my family is used to.

Since I am home and I am making breakfast and lunch I usually make dinner for us during nap time along with cleaning. Not just the daycare areas but the entire house, bathrooms, make beds, wash clothes. All of this so that I can relax on the weekends.

I feel like I am going at 200mph during the week. I am so exhausted at the end of the night my head hits the pillow and it is time for the next day.

How do you do it all?

I actually can not clean during the week with the kids here but, I do vacuum almost every day. sometimes right after lunch, sometimes after nap or after they leave. I clean usually on Saturdays. This is the whole house and unfortunately takes me about 9 hours! Sundays is spent going to the grocery stores. I need to find a better way to balance it all too. I do "rest" my eyes during naptime though. I relax in a recliner in the room the kids are sleeping in. I like to be up til about 11 and have some "me" time after the kids go to sleep at night so I am not willing to give that up yet! But, every night I make sure all toys are put away and the house remains pretty neat all week now that I am home! Good luck finding a great balance! Let me know what works!::

[hope]

Great topic!
I too find it so hard to balance. During nap time I facile, dust, mop, clean bathrooms. During free play i throw loads of laundry in n fold/hang at night. I am always cleaning play area as the day goes on but i also wake an extra hour each morning to really clean. Once my daycare workday is done i still need to make dinner, sit for dinner with my family, bath the kids, clean up after dinner n usually run whatever errands need be. I waitress on saturday nights. Saturday morning and afternoon i grocery shop. Come Sunday I feel like I have been run over by a truck......but thats family day. We always plan a nice day for the kids, me n hubby to do. All the work is worth it when we r driving home after a nicely planned day n the kids say " that was awsome" .

[Evansmom]

I feel your pain!
I too struggle with getting everything "done" but honestly I'm coming up on my 6th year of doing this job out of my home and I find that the best thing for my body and mind is to admit that I can not do it all. I'm only one person. Going at 200 mph like you said is unsustainable. I tried to do it for a long time too and I got Burnt. Out. !!

Instead now I try to rotate things that need to be done because they are imminent. I call it "putting out the fires" . The squeaky wheel gets the grease!! Ha ha!

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I do go 200mph during the day, minus the time I spend on here which I consider "relaxing" and my "social time." ::

The night before, I make sure that the floors, laundry, and dishes are done or are in the process of being done. I load up the dishwasher as soon as dishes get near the sink. It's much easier to do it that way than to have a sink full.

I throw a load of laundry into the washer before I go to bed. In the morning, I switch it to the dryer and start another load. I will switch it again during rest time and fold the dried loads/put them away.

Floors get done at night in the daycare areas (vacuumed and mopped). Floors in other areas of the house get done as needed. If I notice they need it one morning, I might do it before any kids arrive or I might do it at the very beginning of rest time since the vacuum is noisy.

Bathroom gets cleaned (that they use) when they're putting their shoes and such on for outside play. I clean other bathrooms when I use them and notice they are BEGINNING to look like they may need some TLC. I'm really picky, though, so it never gets gross. ::

Things get wiped down as I go. I'm extremely tidy so this is pretty easy.

Lesson planning I do during the week. I might do it during rest time, center time, at night, etc. Whenever it is convenient for me.

Errands I typically save for Friday or Saturday. We attend Church quite often on Saturday, but if we are unable to that night we go to their Sunday morning service.

Bill paying gets done as they come in.

I do absolutely nothing on the 7th day (no chores, no errands, etc.). I spend it resting.

I'm a newly single mom in her 20's with a teenager and a baby on the way. I do what I can, and I don't fret if something doesn't or can't get done that day. I used to, but there's just no time to waste worrying anymore. I want to enjoy every day and not dwell on CHORES and things of that nature. Some days, not as much gets done. Other days, I get everything done (for the week!).

[Evansmom]

And I try to keep this poem in mind when things feel out of hand as they often can in this job:

If I Had My Child to Raise Over Again
by Diane Loomans

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self esteem first, and the house later.
I'd fingerpaint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd model less about the love of power,
And more about the power of love.

[Scout]

Here is my typical weekend day! Love it, not!

Summary of my day(off)...
Wake up at 7:45 with Spence
Put in two loads of laundry
Go to 2 grocery stores with both kids
Come home, empty fridge out, clean out snack cabinet, put groceries away, make pb & j for me and spence
Put Spencer down for nap
Go to Pakitans with Jack to get supplies for his school project
Go to city Library
Go to another citiy library
Go to BJs
Go back to our city library
Come home, make wedding soup for sick husband and grilled cheese, start to do Jacks project, clean kitchen, give kids bath, get Spencey ready for bed with snack and dowm time.
Put baby to bed
Finally start project with Jack( probably around 8pm)
Wash more clothes
Lay with Jack til he falls asleep
Take my shower
Finally sit down around maybe 10 if I am lucky!!

We didn't finish his project til 10 so I didn't get to even shower til 11!!!

[littlemissmuffet]

I just do it. Always have. But now more than ever. My daughter was born over three months premature and has been in the NICU ever since - for almost 70 days now. I do a 10 hour day of daycare and get everything household related done during that time so I can spend every non-working moment with my own kid and hubs.

The only thing I do that is work related, outside of actual daycare time is grocery shop, and honestly, I often do that with the daycare kids too. And I don't have a vehical. So, I think everything is possible if you just put your mind to it.

There's some tips in this thread: https://www.daycare.com/forum/showth...ight=balancing

[lolaland]

And I try to keep this poem in mind when things feel out of hand as they often can in this job:

If I Had My Child to Raise Over Again
by Diane Loomans

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self esteem first, and the house later.
I'd fingerpaint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd model less about the love of power,
And more about the power of love.

I LOVE this!! I think I'll print it on a t-shirt and wear it everyday so I'll always remember!!

[Msdunny]

I faced those same challenges, and I have made a couple if changes.

1. Over the weekend I termed my "late day" dcf. I already have the spots filled with dcks who will be picked up earlier in the day.

2. I order my groceries from a local chain that will shop for me. I then only have to drive over and pick them up at a time that is convienent for me. This is the best $17 I spend each month!

Otherwise, my family helps out with the clean up during the week. My eh is a minister, so our Sundays can be busy. We work together during the week so we have weekend time together. But that is what works for me - I know it wouldn't work for everyone.

[itlw8]

It took us a long long time to get it down. Our solution ? I do not do it all. I try to keep the childcare area picked up and clean as we go. I then clean and close it for the weekend.

As for the rest of the house we work together. I work longer hours than dh so why shouldn't he do his share. He takes care or the dishwasher, trash, and cleans up after dinner. He usually does the vaccuming. ( well the center of the room)He also hangs up the laundry and I wash and fold it.

Th house is not perfect but we keep ahead of it .

When Our kids were at home they had chores and did their share Now the grand kids are here alot. I noticed they like to vaccume and dust.

Slow down and plan a family meeting to find away for everyone to do their share.

[DaisyMamma]

I can't do it. It's becoming a serious problem actually. Changes need to be made asap. I don't know what the key is.
Cleaning and doing laundry during naptime is not the answer for me. I'm so stressed out by the time the last kid is asleep that I have to sit down. I'm going to be hiring some help I guess.

1. Housecleaner - to come on Sundays for a few hours and possibly Wed. afternoon.
2. Hours for my substitute? Or maybe an assistant to come a couple times during the week so I can clean or spend time with my own kids.

[lolaland]

I can't do it. It's becoming a serious problem actually. Changes need to be made asap. I don't know what the key is.
Cleaning and doing laundry during naptime is not the answer for me. I'm so stressed out by the time the last kid is asleep that I have to sit down. I'm going to be hiring some help I guess.

1. Housecleaner - to come on Sundays for a few hours and possibly Wed. afternoon.
2. Hours for my substitute? Or maybe an assistant to come a couple times during the week so I can clean or spend time with my own kids.

I did had an assistant last year for about 6 months... it did not solve my problem because Massachusetts laws defining how many hours an assistant can stay by themselves in daycare are so little (20 hours total per year... and many restrictions on how you distribute those hours trough the week/month) ... my house is not license daycare space area so even being in the same building it was considered as if assistant was alone in daycare... and the expenses of having an assistant in pay roll were to high to handle with such little advantage. Hope it works better for you...

[Evansmom]

I LOVE this!! I think I'll print it on a t-shirt and wear it everyday so I'll always remember!!

Thanks! I love it too, keeps things in perspective.

And remember, a messy house means that you've been spending time with the kids instead of cleaning and isn't that the point of it all?