Social Life

[Country Kids]

I spend almost every minute I am not at work with my DH. He was my high school sweetheart and is my best friend.

We are new empty nesters (about 15 months now). We travel. ALOT.

We take looooong road trips anywhere we feel like going. Sometimes we have no idea where we will end up or which direction we are heading...we just get in the truck, turn on the XM Radio to the Canadian comedy channel (they are WAAAAAY funnier than U.S. comics ) and we drive and talk and drive and talk.

The journey IS the destination.

We also snowmobile (when there is snow) and have a group of friends that snowmobile as well

In the summer months we spend every waking moment that we are not at work on our houseboat. There is a little island in the middle of the lake here and LOTS of houseboaters park on that island and hang out. One side of the island is usually families and the other side is usually those without kids. It's is super fun and it's neat to see each generation continue the practice.

As far as personal hobbies go, I am a BIG reader and read more than one book at a time.

I also scrapbook, make jewelry, take nature and B&W photos, garden (both veggies and flowers) and I stay up really late watching lots of trashy TV in the evenings when DH is in bed. I am a night owl and sleep VERY little so my DVR is always recording something.

My life when we are empty nesters but we have aways to go still.

Would you mind if I just moved in for awhile and did a practice run?::

[Country Kids]

well I debated about jumping in on this thread.. but I guess I may as well..
I see things from all spectrums...
church... gym... puzzles... reading... sand sculpture... so.. I'll throw me in there also...

I'll say this to begin.. just remember that life changes.. evolves...as your children grow up..

When I started home daycare in 1992 my oldest daughter was 2 years old..my husband and I were extreme HOME BODIES.. cooked dinner at home..church on Sunday morning... dinner and television every night of the week... NO HOBBIES... we raised our little girl.. and that was IT...

At some point we started bowling on a league.. and although we struggled to keep a reliable babysitter for our girls.. and then the cost of sitter... bowling fees... eating out..it was several hundred per month..but.. we NEEDED something to do... so we made it work...for a few years... but.. after 15 years.. we divorced...
Our girls were 6 and 10 . .. After divorce life was so different..
I began dating my NOW husband.. a year later we married.... (11th wedding anniversary will be May 25) He has 3 daughters.. oldest is a stepdaughter ..but he is the only daddy she's ever known.. and then his two daughters... at the time they were 4, 5 and 10.. now they are 15, 16 and 22.... my girls were 7 and 11 at wedding... now 18 and 22...

Life began to revolve around visitation weekends... visitation week nights.. and.. KID FREE nights and weekends..
His girls lived with their mom... my girls with their dad....about two blocks from me..
. we were BOTH child support paying/visiting parents....that is a huge adjustment...some of it WONDERFUL.. and some if it heartbreaking... (First Christmas Eve was the other parents turn to have both sets of kids... that's a rough night)
In the beginnging we ate out allot... later we bought a jeep.. joined a jeep club.. husband later became PRESIDENT of club... I became Membership Secretary for a REGIONAL 4 wheel drive association... .. we made trips to East Texas... Kansas.. Colorado... with our jeep... tent camped most of the time... with and without our kids...

AND THEN... we started playing POOL..

Our girls were getting older... and.. most of the time we played on weeknights so our girls weren't with us...
My husband had played all his life... and although I grew up with a pool table in my grandfather's basement.. and.. and pool table at my aunt's house.. I never played much.. the boys always played..
8 years ago.. my husband and I are out with friends for dinner.. the place has a pool table...
the other couple insist that we play couple against couple..
I fell in LOVE..
We came home and I told Hubby... we need a pool table..
.. he thought so too.
He bought us a used 'bar box' off of Ebay...
We started playing local pool tournaments.. leagues...
2,3, 4 nights per week..
sometimes it was really hard for me..
On a weeknight a tournament can run really late... and if we were playing well.. then I was OUT LATE...then up early to run daycare.. then OUT LATE again the next night... There were weeks that we were out 3-4 weeknights.. but.. WE LOVED IT...!!!
Then 2 years ago my husband took a second shift job...
Our pool playing came to a SCREECHING HALT...
We were on a league.. we quit... All the team members begged me to continue even though Mark would be at work..but I said no..
NO WAY am I hanging out in a bar/tavern/pool hall .. without my husband...
We were ALWAYS together.. ALWAYS...
I went through about 9 months of almost constant sadness and depression..
By then my oldest daughter was out of the home.. married.. and had just given birth to my now 2 year old granddaughter...
My other daughter had moved to live with us.. but she was 16.. in high school.. driving.. and working...
I was home alone...EVERY NIGHT..
you want to talk about a life style adjustment!!!!!
No pool..
No socialization except for daycare clients..
plus my husband was working tons of overtime...and allot of weekends..
It was an UGLY UGLY TIME in my life.. I cried all the time..
sadness and uselessness...
Then I slowly started shaking out of it..
Time goes on.. people adapt..
I started meeting friends for dinner several nights per week..
My husband and I have a joke about it now.. he asks who is your 'date' tonight.? I start texting him as soon as the last daycare child leaves.. if not before... I keep him constantly informed of where I am.. who I'm having dinner with.. I take pictures of my friends at the table.. of our food... and tell him what is going on... what our conversations are about.. etc... he messages me as he is able.. on breaks..
Wednesdays it's David and Robin.. a married couple we've been friends with for years... we meet at the same place .. eat dinner... hang out awhile.. home by 8:30 or 9 p.m.
Thursday nights I have a group of about 6 women.. we meet at the same place each week.. We call it our MENSA meeting...
we sit at same table..have the same waitress... One of my girlfriends comes here to my home to pick me up... we ride together.. she drops me off on her way home...
Friday's is 'open'.. but I seem to always have someone text me to see what I'm doing..
It's either girlfriends... single or married.. with or with out spouse..most of the time we end up with a fairly large group...
We go to local places.. sit and visit.. catch up on each other's lives...
Saturday is my night with my husband.. we eat out.. we have or go to parties ... cards.. pool... etc...
Sunday afternoon... 4 p.m.. pool tournament at the VFW...
We started going about 1 year ago... and..
It is usually the same people each week... about 8-12 of us.. people we've known and played with for years... we have a blast... Most weeks I win LAST LADY in tournament... My husband frequently wins 1st or 2nd place... which.. doesn't pay much.. $15 for me .. last lady... but.. it only costs us $5 each to play.. so .. I usually make our money back plus $5

My youngest daughter still lives with me..
she is 18 now.. graduated last year.. works.. and sleeps.. I seldom see her.. but she stays in touch by text and is home everynight safe in her bed..

We also travel several times per year..
Last year we went to Mexico in late May and again in mid June..
In December we took a 4 day cruise to Mexico..(5th cruise since we married)...
We just booked a trip to Playa del Carmen for end of May with another couple...

It's a good life...

https://www.texasjeepgirl.shutterfly.com

Besides Blackcat, I would like to move in with you also for awhile and do a practice run so I'm prepared for this empty nest stage.

It sounds fun even though my hubby says I'm going to hate it, he doesn't know how I loooonnnngggg someone not needing me 26 hours a day-

[Blackcat31]

My life when we are empty nesters but we have aways to go still.

Would you mind if I just moved in for awhile and did a practice run?::

If I could claim you as a tax deduction, I would send you a plane ticket tomorrow! ::

[Country Kids]

If I could claim you as a tax deduction, I would send you a plane ticket tomorrow! ::

I'll clean for you!!!!

Are personal assistants a write off?

HHMM, sounding better by the minute-

[Texasjeepgirl]

If I could claim you as a tax deduction, I would send you a plane ticket tomorrow! ::

ditto!!! We would have a blast.. ...

If you are still married to the father of your children.. I UNDERSTAND... for those of us who are second marriage.. it changes your life in more ways than you can ever imagine..
It's the HARDEST THING I've ever been through.. and yet... My ex and a I have been friends for years.. He had about 1 year of.. how can I say... STAND OFFISHNESS...

(we are NOT friends with my hubby's ex... but... you can't win them all right?)

I'm not 100% empty nest..
YET... My 18 year old still lives here...
I have to remind her to get her laundry out of the dryer... and... clean out litter box ... and pick up the towel in the bathroom from your shower..

Last year my husband's youngest daughter lived with us for 6 months.. while my husband was at work second shift.. she was never any trouble.. but... she decided to move back to her mom's house because we live in a small town.. not enough social life to keep her happy...

I'm 46... 2 year old granddaughter is in my daycare EVERY DAY.. but.. they rarely ask me to keep her after hours... so far...

[AmyLeigh]

Like others have posted, I am very active in church. So that keeps me busy at least three days a week. Not only do I have many friends in my congregation, but also in others in surrounding communities. Dh is a minister who travels to give Bible talks, and frequently our family is invited to a meal afterwards. Our world has expanded exponentially because of that.
My hobbies tend to be solitary ones (reading, crochet, running) and I am an Aspie introvert, so traditional classes don't interest me at all. But just spending time with dh, friends, and family keeps me from getting too isolated.
(Btw, my parents live just down the street and my mom and I are very close and see each other practically every day.)

[cheerfuldom]

I think I am probably in more of a unique situation with the providers on this board. I have a lot of little ones of my own (4 kids under 6) and one is nursing still and refuses the bottle so I am with the kiddos pretty much 24/7. I am not able to get out for much kid free time and our newborn goes on our dates with us! I know some people would frown on that but he's too small for a babysitter (not even 3 months) especially when he wont take a bottle. Anywho....here are some things that work for me

*church and church activities (most of childcare provided or there are other kids that my kids can run around with while i chat)
*online like here, facebook, some other forums, plus catching up on shows i like
*walks. we do many of the trails and local parks. my kids will walk for a LONG time and we babywear the small ones. exercise, fresh air, and wearing out the kids....score!
*local craft fairs and festivals. many are held outdoors and very kid friendly
*browsing at antique stores
*reading, lots of reading
*i sew a huge variety of things but mainly kids clothing. i sell some of it too
*yard saling! super easy to give the kids a dollar or two and keeps them busy for at least a half dozen sales
*i host a lot of things at the house. its hard to take my four anywhere but we do potluck style with friends that have kids the same age. its great when we can eat outside.....i dont have to clean or prep anything and the kids just run around the backyard while we visit. we also can hire a babysitter to watch all the kids downstairs (cheap when we split the bill!) and we stay upstairs and talk, play games, sometimes the guys video game, or we watch a movie
*my husband enjoys home projects, wood working, cars and guns

[bunnyslippers]

I am a very social person, under normal circumstances. Since having my children, though, I really enjoy my family time. I have such a hard time getting motivated to leave my house. I have plans tonight to go out with a friend, and I am already looking for an excuse to not go. I just hate leaving at night, because I feel like I still have so many mom jobs to do when I get home.

We have lots of friends around, and socialize with many families from my son's kindergarten and basketball teams. I am just feeling very wrapped in mommy-dom right now. Sigh.

[boysx5]

I have a neighbor who also does childcare we chat everyday get our kids together when the weather is nice. I also have a group of friends I met in a playgroup awhile back and once a month or more we go out or go to one of our houses for a game nite.

[Sugar Magnolia]

so are you going to bike week in march. My dh can't wait to go, we will be the only canadians who are either really pale or really burnt. He's so excited to go (he's the motorcycle freak, born and raised in the field)

I would like to go someday.....but was wondering if its a Harley
.type of event? We ride Kawasaki Ninjas. There is a Hooters in town that hosts a bike night, but I won't go because I have heard rice burners are not welcomed.