Do Your Daycare Parents...

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  • e.j.
    Daycare.com Member
    • Dec 2010
    • 3738

    #16
    Parents are welcome to come into my house as they drop off and pick up. The only thing that bothers me is when they leave their wet/snowy shoes on and track the mess in with them.

    Comment

    • LK5kids
      Daycare.com Member
      • Oct 2012
      • 1222

      #17
      When I did child care the first time around I added an addition to the back of my home and the back entry led right into the first daycare room. If I had a separate entry I would still have expected parents to come in.

      I feel parents naturally have an interest about the environment their kids are in all day. I seem to be in the minority here on this. I would think it's odd a parent didn't come in. I like parents coming in.

      Now, I did not let parents come through my front door and walk through my living room. That was not child care space. They came to the back door.

      Now I am back into child care and I have bought a home just for child care.
      There is not a separate entry area unless they stood on the front porch and stayed there!

      Again, I am in the minority....but that is what is great about running our own business, we can fine tune it for our own needs.

      Comment

      • Willow
        Advanced Daycare.com Member
        • May 2012
        • 2683

        #18
        I feel really awkward being observed and wouldn't like it if parents came in and just started hanging out.

        Thankfully most of my parents have been really good at taking no more than a couple of minutes at pick up and drop off times. They rarely come in further than the entryway unless I am back changing a diaper or the dogs don't happen to alert me to their arrival.


        I had one dad when I first started who liked to kick off his shoes, come through the entry way, up the stairs, into my living room and plop down on my couch to watch an entire episode of Dora with his almost 4 year old daughter (when I'm not a fan of having the tv on anyway, much less that) before he left every morning. Was a HUUUUUUGE yikes and I did have to put my big girl undies on to deal with it. Either he stunk at picking up on my not so subtle hints that what he was doing was uber creepy or he just flat out didn't care.

        Comment

        • EntropyControlSpecialist
          Embracing the chaos.
          • Mar 2012
          • 7466

          #19
          Originally posted by Blackcat31
          THAT would drive me crazy! It seems ballsy to me.

          I actually put my arm across the opening the other day and told a DCM that she needed to stay in the entry way. She was a little offended I think, but oh, well.
          I opened the gate the other day to let two little girls out and instead of them leaving the Mom came in and sat down with us while we were working on shapes with Magnetix. What??????

          I don't even know what to say, to be honest. I don't want them to feel like they can't come in here because I have something to hide or it's dirty (because it's clearly not and you can see that from the entryway), but on the other hand they really have NO reason to be back here.

          Comment

          • EntropyControlSpecialist
            Embracing the chaos.
            • Mar 2012
            • 7466

            #20
            Originally posted by Childminder
            Most of my parents take off their shoes and come in but I want them to. Heck after awhile most have joined us for a meal or we visit for awhile before they head home. Our home is pretty relaxed and open and we like them to feel comfortable.
            See, I would hate this. Hate it. I love it when they're quickly in and quickly out. I don't want to be their friends. I want to be their child care provider and build a relationship with their children, not them. My entryway isn't a water cooler. I don't want to stand around and gab so I've made myself pretty much unavailable when pick up time comes around, too. I sit down and read to the kids and IF you have something important to talk to me about then you can wait until the book is done and discuss it with me OR text me/call me/email me and let me know that you need to have a talk. I have no problem with having a meeting or setting aside time to talk. I just hate informal chit-chat about nothing.

            Comment

            • Candy
              Daycare.com Member
              • Jan 2013
              • 223

              #21
              Originally posted by Willow
              I feel really awkward being observed and wouldn't like it if parents came in and just started hanging out.

              Thankfully most of my parents have been really good at taking no more than a couple of minutes at pick up and drop off times. They rarely come in further than the entryway unless I am back changing a diaper or the dogs don't happen to alert me to their arrival.


              I had one dad when I first started who liked to kick off his shoes, come through the entry way, up the stairs, into my living room and plop down on my couch to watch an entire episode of Dora with his almost 4 year old daughter (when I'm not a fan of having the tv on anyway, much less that) before he left every morning. Was a HUUUUUUGE yikes and I did have to put my big girl undies on to deal with it. Either he stunk at picking up on my not so subtle hints that what he was doing was uber creepy or he just flat out didn't care.
              There is no way i would have let this guy stay and watch tv. I would have stopped him at the stairs. Not only is it rude but really really creepy.

              Comment

              • LK5kids
                Daycare.com Member
                • Oct 2012
                • 1222

                #22
                Originally posted by Willow
                I feel really awkward being observed and wouldn't like it if parents came in and just started hanging out.

                Thankfully most of my parents have been really good at taking no more than a couple of minutes at pick up and drop off times. They rarely come in further than the entryway unless I am back changing a diaper or the dogs don't happen to alert me to their arrival.


                I had one dad when I first started who liked to kick off his shoes, come through the entry way, up the stairs, into my living room and plop down on my couch to watch an entire episode of Dora with his almost 4 year old daughter (when I'm not a fan of having the tv on anyway, much less that) before he left every morning. Was a HUUUUUUGE yikes and I did have to put my big girl undies on to deal with it. Either he stunk at picking up on my not so subtle hints that what he was doing was uber creepy or he just flat out didn't care.
                Yes, this is boundary crossing for me too.

                Comment

                • LK5kids
                  Daycare.com Member
                  • Oct 2012
                  • 1222

                  #23
                  Originally posted by EntropyControlSpecialist
                  See, I would hate this. Hate it. I love it when they're quickly in and quickly out. I don't want to be their friends. I want to be their child care provider and build a relationship with their children, not them. My entryway isn't a water cooler. I don't want to stand around and gab so I've made myself pretty much unavailable when pick up time comes around, too. I sit down and read to the kids and IF you have something important to talk to me about then you can wait until the book is done and discuss it with me OR text me/call me/email me and let me know that you need to have a talk. I have no problem with having a meeting or setting aside time to talk. I just hate informal chit-chat about nothing.
                  Awwww, I love building a relationship with my parents! But I do understand where u r coming from and why. Boundaries are important.

                  Comment

                  • AnneCordelia
                    Daycare.com Member
                    • Jul 2011
                    • 816

                    #24
                    None of my parents do. I set the standard early and cover drop-offs/pick-ups in my handbook. If parents want to chat with me they email, text, phone, or make an appointment to come in. Of course if a parent had a concern and, say, wanted to quickly check out my sleep room then they could. But I make it clear that all my families drop and pick up within about 15 minutes of each other so I am busy.

                    Comment

                    • e.j.
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • Dec 2010
                      • 3738

                      #25
                      Originally posted by Willow
                      I feel really awkward being observed and wouldn't like it if parents came in and just started hanging out.

                      Thankfully most of my parents have been really good at taking no more than a couple of minutes at pick up and drop off times. They rarely come in further than the entryway unless I am back changing a diaper or the dogs don't happen to alert me to their arrival.


                      I had one dad when I first started who liked to kick off his shoes, come through the entry way, up the stairs, into my living room and plop down on my couch to watch an entire episode of Dora with his almost 4 year old daughter (when I'm not a fan of having the tv on anyway, much less that) before he left every morning. Was a HUUUUUUGE yikes and I did have to put my big girl undies on to deal with it. Either he stunk at picking up on my not so subtle hints that what he was doing was uber creepy or he just flat out didn't care.
                      I should probably clarify....I don't mind parents walking into the day care room with their kids when dropping off and I don't mind if they come in to pick them up and chit chat a bit. I wouldn't want them to feel comfortable plopping down on the sofa to watch a show - that's just way overstepping my open door policy! I don't like it when parents want to stay and observe because I hate being "watched". When parents ask (usually new parents who are interviewing for a spot), I tell them if they want to stay, they can but they can't just observr. I will put them to work helping out. For some reason, they never actually stay after I tell them that.

                      Comment

                      • Candy
                        Daycare.com Member
                        • Jan 2013
                        • 223

                        #26
                        @Willow did his wife know he was coming over there doing that because I would have had a nice little chat with her about it

                        Comment

                        • Willow
                          Advanced Daycare.com Member
                          • May 2012
                          • 2683

                          #27
                          Originally posted by Candy
                          @Willow did his wife know he was coming over there doing that because I would have had a nice little chat with her about it
                          Woah, woah, woooooooah........for one, he was divorced and had primary custody.

                          For two it was the very first time his daughter had ever been in anyone elses care and I'm fairly certain it was just a matter of him being was incredibly nervous about how she was going to do.

                          It was weird, and did creep me out, but in the end he was 100% harmless and I went on to watch his child another year and a half before I moved.

                          They were my second family ever and I didn't have the experience or confidence I do now to have addressed it that very first day, the very moments it was happening. In his defense, after a brief period of time I addressed it, he understood my reasoning, and then he respected my wishes to have shorter drop offs that stayed at the front door.


                          Regardless I would never meddle in someone elses marriage over something so silly. Just because he wanted to sit with his child didn't mean that had anything to do with him having intentions to do anything that would harm his marriage. I would never make such presumptions about someone like that. I can make assumptions and blab to other people about how it made me feel at the time but there's no way I'd take that to someone else's spouse with ZERO proof they had any intention of doing anything wrong.

                          The guy clearly lacked social skills on some level but that didn't mean he was h*ll bent on trying to get in my pants.

                          Comment

                          • Candy
                            Daycare.com Member
                            • Jan 2013
                            • 223

                            #28
                            Originally posted by Willow
                            Woah, woah, woooooooah........for one, he was divorced and had primary custody.

                            For two it was the very first time his daughter had ever been in anyone elses care and I'm fairly certain it was just a matter of him being was incredibly nervous about how she was going to do.

                            It was weird, and did creep me out, but in the end he was 100% harmless and I went on to watch his child another year and a half before I moved.

                            They were my second family ever and I didn't have the experience or confidence I do now to have addressed it that very first day, the very moments it was happening. In his defense, after a brief period of time I addressed it, he understood my reasoning, and then he respected my wishes to have shorter drop offs that stayed at the front door.


                            Regardless I would never meddle in someone elses marriage over something so silly. Just because he wanted to sit with his child didn't mean that had anything to do with him having intentions to do anything that would harm his marriage. I would never make such presumptions about someone like that. I can make assumptions and blab to other people about how it made me feel at the time but there's no way I'd take that to someone else's spouse with ZERO proof they had any intention of doing anything wrong.

                            The guy clearly lacked social skills on some level but that didn't mean he was h*ll bent on trying to get in my pants.
                            Huh who said he was trying to get into your pants?? What presumptions was I making I'm lost? I assumed he was just being a clingy parent not trying to get with you. Sorry didn't mean to offend you.

                            Comment

                            • canadiancare
                              Daycare Member
                              • Nov 2009
                              • 552

                              #29
                              My setting is very informal. Front hallway/entrance way and about 5 feet away is the opening to the main room/playroom. No gates, doors etc. The room has a huge window that faces the porch/front door so they can look in/out that way. I don't have a problem if they walk in a few feet. I wouldn't want them to hang out, though mainly because I am excited for the day to end.


                              A few years ago we had a situation here with children who were being abused by a caregiver. The parents were never allowed in the house and dropped off at the mudroom area. It turns out the kids were stuck in pack and plays in the basement furnace room all day.

                              Comment

                              • Heidi
                                Daycare.com Member
                                • Sep 2011
                                • 7121

                                #30
                                Originally posted by LK5kids
                                When I did child care the first time around I added an addition to the back of my home and the back entry led right into the first daycare room. If I had a separate entry I would still have expected parents to come in.

                                I feel parents naturally have an interest about the environment their kids are in all day. I seem to be in the minority here on this. I would think it's odd a parent didn't come in. I like parents coming in.

                                Now, I did not let parents come through my front door and walk through my living room. That was not child care space. They came to the back door.

                                Now I am back into child care and I have bought a home just for child care.
                                There is not a separate entry area unless they stood on the front porch and stayed there!

                                Again, I am in the minority....but that is what is great about running our own business, we can fine tune it for our own needs.

                                No, I'm with you and the 2 PP's. I like my parents to come in. Not every day, and the shoes need to come off, but I want them to feel welcome. I think it builds a sense of loyalty. No guarantees, of course.

                                I think everyone needs to do what works for them.

                                Comment

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