Addressing Concerns

[EAP]

If you have had a specific developmental concern about a child how / when did you address it? I am struggling to find a way to talk with a parent about a concern I have regarding an issue. I have researched my concern and think there may be an issue but can't find the right time to address it. We already had assessments 2 months ago and it wasn't as prevalent then and also the issue has now gone on for many months and I think may have been just ignored before.

[NeedaVaca]

I think it depends on the concern you have, could you share more? I have had to talk to 2 different parents about developmental issues. One was receptive and very sad because it turned out it was autism but mom wanted to get her all the help she possibly could, the other was not receptive and actually told me a lot of lies (it was a speech problem). In the end this mom did get the child evaluated and the child is getting help but mom was in denial for a long time!

I have a special needs child and would do anything to help him and loved getting all the advice I could, but then there are parents in complete denial. I think it depends on the issue you are seeing and how receptive you think the mom will be when you broach the subject with her...

[EAP]

Its motor delay related - there are some very specific indicators that are excessive and really have been constant for months.

[NeedaVaca]

Why don't you start by asking DCP if they have noticed the things you are noticing when the child is in your care. Let them know what you are seeing and your concerns and give her printable materials that you found, maybe highlighting the specific areas of concern?

I always told my parents that while I am not a professional in this field I do have a lot of special needs experience (I worked in a birth-3 program for my state), this is what I am seeing and I wouldn't feel right not mentioning it. Please seek professional evaluation (give her the paperwork for a program in your area-the state 0-3 early intervention program is free, over age 3 the local schools do it for free). Then, either they can the help they need-the earlier the better for the child OR they get peace of mind knowing everything is ok

[EAP]

I think they would want the assessment done. Thanks for for the response.

[e.j.]

Why don't you start by asking DCP if they have noticed the things you are noticing when the child is in your care.

This is how I usually start the conversation, too. "I've been noticing..... Have you noticed it at home, too? If they have, I ask if they're concerned about it and whether or not they've spoken to their pediatrician. If they haven't, I give them more detail, explain why I'm concerned and suggest they speak with their pedi about it.

[Country Kids]

What do you do though if they say they want to see if they will outgrow it.

Anytime there is a concern I get-We want to see if they outgrow it.

[NeedaVaca]

For me it depends on the issue and how severe it is. I would tell them early intervention is key and so important for the child's success. I would say also say something along the lines of why not let a trained professional make that decision? After an eval they could very well say it's something they will outgrow, but what if they would greatly benefit from help, therapy, etc. Why wouldn't you want that for your child?

[e.j.]

For me it depends on the issue and how severe it is.

Same here; it all depends on what I'm seeing and how concerned I am about it. The earlier a child is diagnosed for something like Autism, for example, the more important it is for early intervention. I'll push a little harder when I think there's a more obvious need and say something like, "I know you'd prefer to wait and see what happens but I really think the sooner you speak to your pediatrician, the better. Here's why...." I also make it easy for them and offer a written list of the behaviors I'm observing at day care so they can just hand it to the pediatrician to read. All they have to ask is, "Should I be concerned?"

I have had to talk to a few parents about my concerns for their kids. One took my suggestion to heart and had the child evaluated but two familes didn't. One parent told me, "I had the same problems as a kid and I turned out okay." and the other took the child out of my care because I had expressed my concerns. (Both kids eventually were diagnosed; one with Autism and the other with Dyslexia). It's frustrating when parents won't listen but as the provider, all you can do is express your concerns and hope they are taken seriously.