I'm new, question about children

[mrs.meg]

Hello all,

I just began my home daycare about 3 weeks ago. I am not new to child care, I just took off to be with my youngest 2 years ago. It seems to me that most children I have kept are not disciplined at home. I have a little boy who is 3 1/2. I feel like our days are constant power-struggles. He wants to be in control, tell me what we're going to do and if he doesn't make the decisions, he just doesn't understand. He and his little brother came from a daycare facility and I am sure it was much more structured, but I do have a daily routine. I think he just thought that he could do what he does at home, here. I wondered if it is just me, or do any of you feel that you are in a constant struggle with behavior? I wondered how long it takes for a child to get used to not being in control all the time? I guess I am a little rusty, but I had another child like this when I babysat before and it just didn't seem to get much better. Are some children just born with a controlling nature? It is a little frustrating. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

[Unregistered]

Just ignore it

I have two group day cares and this kind of children always shine. if you have your routine set and you are very confident about your activities just ignore when a child tries to tell you what to do. do not argue or respond a simply no we are not doing that or simply we are doing this works fine. remember you are the adult and teacher, eventually they give up and go along with the scheduled routine. the important things is to be consistent and you'll win. kids always try to manipulate, if they see that u r a little soft they will walk all over u. you can be firm, disciplinarian, teacher, friend and mother just believe you are and they kids will respect that on the long run. good luck

[lilbiddapopcorn]

Ah those kids

I've had this problem. What works for me: I say "Aaron, these are your choices. You can join us in art time, or you can sit with William (our teacher's assistant) until we're finished." And he'll always whine and say "But I wanna do ______" And I say "No, those are your two options." And then I start art time or whatever and he always joins in. If he creates a problem during that activity, he sits out, and usually if this happens for one activity, by the time the next one comes, he understands his choices and we don't have a problem.Hope that helps.

[mrs.meg]

Thanks to both of you, your advice is greatly appreciated and is of great help! Those power struggles are exhausting!