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  • Meeko
    Advanced Daycare.com Member
    • Mar 2011
    • 4351

    #16
    I don't mean to appear unkind and I understand that your situation is hard.

    However....change is something your son is going to have to deal with in his life...no matter how hard it is. Could you look at this as a learning experiment for all of you?

    I don't mean to get personal, but what if you have to move? What if you have another child? Life changes come to us all whether asked for or not. Changes in employment, births, deaths etc.

    I fully appreciate how hard it must be to run your daycare and take the best care you can of your son.

    Have you talked to his doctors about the situation...other than an immediate fix? A temporary fix would be to close your daycare. But later on something is going to happen that you cannot change. Maybe something much bigger and more disruptive to his life.

    Just a few thoughts. Again, I hope I do not offend you. I just wanted to maybe look at it from another angle.

    Comment

    • MarinaVanessa
      Family Childcare Home
      • Jan 2010
      • 7211

      #17
      I think at think at this point you are so worried about your son and his anxiety if one or both of your DC families found childcare elsewhere soon or within the next couple of months and left your DC then to you it wouldn't such a bad thing because things at home would get a little bit back to normal for your son. I am I correct in my assumptions?

      I'm also assuming that you don't really need the money since you aren't really worried about having them both go so soon before the summer so I think if this is how you feel then telling them now was a good choice for you.

      Comment

      • Anne
        New Daycare.com Member
        • Dec 2012
        • 11

        #18
        Thanks again and no it is not unkind and I have felt and did feel that way even back when I started this process and his anxiety ramped up, I figured he would adjust but he has lost weight now along with all the anxiety so I feel like for his well being I have to make this change. I also want to get him another eval which means a 2.5 hr drive and going abt 3-4 months for follow up or at least that is the way they did it last time this on top of his other appts and having 2 other children I am afraid I would also lose clients just because I would have to close alot to make all this happen. We have no grandparents [all have passed] He has been through alot in the past yr having lost his favorite uncle [my brother ] to suicide. The local dr wants to try meds that scare the daylights out of me because suicide is a side effect in smaller children so my answer was NO he will get eval again somewhere that deals with children only. He is already on his adhd med and that is enough as far as I am concerned I would rather spend the gas and time to take him to pyschologist etc then try another med. I really think as he grows and matures he will do better, I have already seen a huge improvement just from 2 yrs ago and so has his school but every now and again we have a "backslide" and have to regroup. I can even apply at our local school system and be a substitue aid I already went through the fbi fingerprinting etc to do daycare so all is not lost as far as that goes and maybe the local licensing will let me keep an "inactive" license [meaning no children but I comply with my credit hrs needed every yr etc ] until I can figure this out. Thanks again for all the advice and insight

        Comment

        • MarinaVanessa
          Family Childcare Home
          • Jan 2010
          • 7211

          #19
          What medication do they want your child to try? My DD has ADHD and impulse control issues and I didn't want her on Ritalin because I didn't want her to "zombie out" so they suggested Strattera. The thing is that all of the ADD and ADHD medication have a disclaimer for possible suicidal thoughts but we had tried everything from changing her diet, therapy, workshops, exercises, routine, consistency etc. so finally we decided to give Starttera a shot. I has possibly been the best decision that my DH and I have made as parents ... she still has her rambunctious energy and her cleverness but she has been able to focus at school control her impulses. Her grades are up and she has less trouble now ... she's the same child just more focused. We work closely with her DR of course and she has a therapist as well and we are still watchful for possible side effects but so far so good. The good thing about this drug is that we can start/stop it at any time with no negative effect to her and it's not addictive. We give it to her on school days and don't give it to her on weekends or school breaks (I'd never expect her teachers to have to deal with her behavior, as parent's we are better equipped at being patient and dealing with her behavior without the medication).

          I'm just saying this because you just never know what is out there, who knows ... maybe there is something that will work for him which will help him but you are his mom and only you know what's best for him and your family. I really hope things get better for you guys soon .

          Comment

          • Anne
            New Daycare.com Member
            • Dec 2012
            • 11

            #20
            Thank you. right now he is on vyvanse as high was they can go for his age/weight. it works well for him. He cant swallow pills yet as he has texture/sensory things going on too. Vyvanse I can open capsule and mix with something to drink for him. They had suggested prozac or zoloft for him, they both scare me too much. You are right if they leave early that would be in our families best interest but I also want to give them plenty of time to look for the right daycare for them. My husband is a RN so he makes a good living, I was lookin forward to having the extra cash to do fun things with the kids.

            Comment

            • Sprouts
              Licensed Provider
              • Dec 2010
              • 846

              #21
              Hi welcome! Just curious, maybe u said before ...how old is your son?

              I'm sorry you are going through this, but I am also glad to hear that you don't have to rely on child care income to get by....

              Does your son have friends that he plays with, is he okay with other children in his class or age range?

              If you did want to continue child care maybe u cAn advertise as just part time, like 2 or 3 days a week for short hours?

              Comment

              • Anne
                New Daycare.com Member
                • Dec 2012
                • 11

                #22
                he is 8. He does better with girls in his class. use to have no interest what so ever in kids his age. he has gotten ALOT better with that in just this past yr. I have always had an IEP for him at school. he has narrow interests like space, the Presidents of the US, figuring out Math problems etc. he has NEVER played with toys and I mean never. He loves to get on the computer and look up diff presidents etc and he enjoys reading. he also enjoys designing houses on SIMS of all things
                to be honest in the state I live in I am not sure the amount of money I would make from very limited p/t d/c would be worth it due to all the state regs, classes etc. In 2 yrs I have to turn around and do this all over again to maintain license......everyone over 18 fingerprinting at 55/person, all five of us physicals again, firemarshal pd again 75.00 not to mention I have to get 18 credit hours before nov again. the classes the lic lady showed me was 150.00 cpr/first aid I think was around 100.00 I know there is more but I just cant think of it now. I will have to look into alittle more and maybe I could when I get our son evaluated and try to get our family back to "normal" do like a tues, wed, thurs. I am also looking into sub in school system to see which is a better fit for us

                Comment

                • Anne
                  New Daycare.com Member
                  • Dec 2012
                  • 11

                  #23
                  update
                  I have let both families know. I feel better already that they are aware of what is going on

                  Comment

                  • Blackcat31
                    • Oct 2010
                    • 36124

                    #24
                    Originally posted by Anne
                    update
                    I have let both families know. I feel better already that they are aware of what is going on
                    Notifying families of change IS the hard part so atleast you have that out of the way now.

                    Comment

                    • Sprouts
                      Licensed Provider
                      • Dec 2010
                      • 846

                      #25
                      Just do what is best for your family, everything else will follow. I wish you the best

                      Comment

                      • Crazy In Mo
                        New Daycare.com Member
                        • Dec 2012
                        • 177

                        #26
                        Kiddos to you for putting your baby first I think just focusing on him is what's important right now! Hope everything works out and he gets "back to normal"

                        Comment

                        • Anne
                          New Daycare.com Member
                          • Dec 2012
                          • 11

                          #27
                          Thank you
                          I feel I did what was best for my family [child] but I also took their side into my decision to give them plenty of time to take their time to find a good fit for them. If they leave that is fine, I can then begin to concentrate on my child. Thanks again to all for the advice and support

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