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I have a 17-month-old DCB that has always loved food, but the last couple months he's started having screaming tantrums whenever he sees food or even when I bring out plates and cups for lunch. If he's playing he will stop and rush to the table and scream at the top of his lungs until he has food. Same way at snack times. He eats as much or more than my 2 & 3 year olds and I know he isn't starving. He's so loud my assistant and I can't hear each other talking, or hear the other kids. We acknowledge him, put him in his high chair, but nothing stops the screaming until he has food. We've been feeding him first just to stop it, but then I feel that I'm rewarding behavior that he shouldn't be doing, so I tried making him quiet down before I served him. Didn't work. Has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? I feel that his age it's a little ridiculous to have such a tantrum EVERY time. It's starting to get the other kids worked up too, so I really want to find a solution!
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I have a almost 9 month boy who does this too . I feel its because his mom&/or gramma encourage it by responding to it. It is just as bad as the 17month old. I have had to put him in the pac n play where he naps or in the play yard enclosure just to keep him from trying to break my baby gate down from standing at the gate and shaking it hard. He is bigger than my 15 month old and loves to eat . -
I have serious issues with a child eating anything while in that state of mind. It can't be healthy for their little stomachs, and it's a terrible habit to start of eating while in a tantrum. Then they learn to eat when they are upset, creating a life-long eating disorder.
So, I don't offer food until the tantrum is completely over. I do just the opposite as you. I would remove the child from the high chair when they scream. Can you put up a fence so the child can't get to the high chair/table? Then when they calm down, put them in their chair. The first time or two, when they are calm for just a second, get them to the chair immediately, with food already on the tray, then over time give them more time to be calm.
Who wants their child to learn to eat while upset?
Good luck.Comment
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i have a 17 month old does the SAME THING!!!!!!!!!!!! omg.. same situation.. he eats more than the preschoolers and at EVERY meal, but still acts as if he hasnt eaten in months when he sees food or ppl moving toward the eating table.
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This is what I do also. I know it tough on the ears but feeding a child that is obviously not starving only reinforces the behavior. I had one exactly like this that was 18mo. I ended up setting up a pack n play for him and putting it on the opposite side of the room. When he'd scream I'd remove him from the table (mine all eat at a child's size table once they can walk) and place him in the pack n play with a firm "no scream. Too loud" It was hectic at first and things got worse but only for a little bit. It took a good long week but I didn't give in and it eased up.
Once he calmed down I took him out and sat him down at the table again. If he started screaming again I'd ask him "Are you screaming?" and if he continued I warned him "If you scream, you will lay down". If he continued he went right back into the pack n play. Once I had to remove him 7 times in one meal and by the time he stopped screaming the other kids had already finished eating so he ate at the table alone while the others played.
DCB did the same at home and guess what? Mom and dad always gave him food
. I did have a chat with DCM about it to let her know that it couldn't be tolerated here and what I was doing here to correct the behavior. Once she saw that it worked here with me they finally stopped it at home.
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my own 18 month old does this right now. I do put her in the chair but she gets nothing till she calms down. I just keep saying "no crying" and "we can eat when you stop crying" and as soon as she stops crying, the food is ready. she is not too young to learn to wait and to learn to control herself. a few times she carried on and on and I just feed the other kids and she watched and figured out that screamers get fed last.
i bet what is happening at home is that toddler is being offered a snack every time they get upset to hush them, its just a crutch so parents dont have to actually address the behaviorComment
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