Concerned About DCG

[MamaG]

She just turned 3. I know dcd is having problems at work that are stressing the family. He is having to leave for days at a time, work nights. Long story short he left for a better job but ended up working most weekends, so old boss offers up great job and he goes back but doesn't get anything he was told he would get, everything goes downhill fast. Trying to get his other job back.

Anywho, she is very winey, cries all the time, is trying to posses all the toys by holding in her arms so nobody can play with them, she isn't eating very well either. She is a very smart 3. I have had issues with bossiness and defiance often. Only child. I've had her 2 years.

What should I do? I do not hug my dcks or let them sit on my lap. I might hug goodbye at pick up but I'm not a touchy fealy person. I don't want to baby her it think she might need extra tlc right now, should I talk to mom at pick up? How do I help?

[Blackcat31]

I have one that is like this too any time something cahnges in their home life. In my opinion, the best thing you can do for them is to continue to stick to all your rules and routines. Kids in any kind of uncertain or stressful situations need security and security often comes in consistent and regular routine.

I would not allow her get "special" just because she is going through a tough time at home. I would let her know though that you understand but you can't allow her to have all the toys or be whiney and get her way just because you feel bad. I would say "I know you are feeling sad right now Allison but the rules at my house are still the same. You need to share the toys with all your friends."

When she gets whiney, I would also require that she use her big girl words/voice. "I know you are feeling sad right now Allison, but I know you are a big girl so please use your big girl voice. I like it so much better when you do."

Reassurance, regular routine and rinse and repeat.

[MamaG]

Lol ok thanks.

[ninosqueridos]

I have one that is like this too any time something cahnges in their home life. In my opinion, the best thing you can do for them is to continue to stick to all your rules and routines. Kids in any kind of uncertain or stressful situations need security and security often comes in consistent and regular routine.

I would not allow her get "special" just because she is going through a tough time at home. I would let her know though that you understand but you can't allow her to have all the toys or be whiney and get her way just because you feel bad. I would say "I know you are feeling sad right now Allison but the rules at my house are still the same. You need to share the toys with all your friends."

When she gets whiney, I would also require that she use her big girl words/voice. "I know you are feeling sad right now Allison, but I know you are a big girl so please use your big girl voice. I like it so much better when you do."

Reassurance, regular routine and rinse and repeat.

yes, this! I have a dcg, almost four who is like this recently bc of home life....custody changes with dcps often so her schedule is all over the place. HOWEVER, she comes here, and she can expect everything to be the same.

[MamaG]

I talked with mom at pickup yesterday and she talked to DCG and today she was happy and well behaved! I'm so relieved she is acting normal. Her mom said she acted super happy all morning so DCG would be in a better mood. It worked