Why Can't I Have Nice Things?

[daycarediva]

I have this going on too.. Why do the parents feel kids should have free run of .your house? I designate the largest room on the first floor to them.. I seperate it from my living space by a very large oval love seat.... Yet it's like I can't have ANYTHING! My mother bought me this pretty candle once, it was a wooden acorn shape and the cap top came of to reveal the candle inside. 4 yo DCB runs right into my LR at pick up time, grabs it off the side table, turns to show his mom and ends up throwing it across the floor. Broken. Mom made HIM apologize, but didn't offer to even try to replace it?
I've given up on the front screen door.. Theyve ripped off the mail slot door 3 times now and bc the parents let the kids open the door coming and going, they eventually ripped the pump out of the wall... Twice. Now the door won't close on its own, but do you think ANY parent remembers to shut it behind them? Half the time they leave both doors wide open when they come in! Heat? Air conditioning? They don't care! I have to say something everyday!

I will tell a parent flat out. "Excuse me, I think you forgot to shut the door, let me get that for you."

I have a STRICT policy on this with the kids. NO CHILD can open or close either of the doors. I have a dcb who is 6, as his Mom stands in the doorway at pickup, he will repeatedly slam the front door open and shut. Mom told him to stop, wait on the porch, and then he started slamming the screen door. I let him do it TWICE. The third time I walked past Mom, held my arm out and grabbed the door. I held it and escorted DCM out. "We can finish this chat when Johnny can treat the doors with respect, thanks! Have a great night!"

*I* don't take it, even if a parent is here.

I truly, honestly, 100% believe that the problems providers have at pick up and drop off, in regards to poor behavior is because the child is showing us who runs the show at home. I WILL show them that this is still my show while they are here.

[countrymom]

Um.... They don't go into their 4 year olds room????

they don't, their kid has a door knob that even locks from the inside and here even my teens don't have that, acually they are lucky they have doors to their bedrooms (we've been remodeling and changing doors, about 2 months ago we put up a door for my 14 yr old and she was so happy like she won the lottery)
this mom couldn't figure out why the room smells either, the kid was peeing. I have another family that is like this. My kids babysit them and one time they went upstairs only to be greated by thousands of fruit flies, lots of open containers and rotten food everywhere.

[countrymom]

I got a better story. I watched this very large girl (she was 5) she was the size of an 8 yr old child. Well the kids would go outside to play and one time she needed to go to the bathroom. So instead of opening the door nicely she ripped off the handle to the screen door, and I mean she was holding it in her hand. Dh was so mad. Mom apoligized but thats it. She broke so many toys too. I did term them but it wasn't for that, they owed me a huge amount of money so I had to send dh to go get it (he dressed in his motorcycle gear)she paid and he handed her a term letter.

[Michelle]

I got a better story. I watched this very large girl (she was 5) she was the size of an 8 yr old child. Well the kids would go outside to play and one time she needed to go to the bathroom. So instead of opening the door nicely she ripped off the handle to the screen door, and I mean she was holding it in her hand. Dh was so mad. Mom apoligized but thats it. She broke so many toys too. I did term them but it wasn't for that, they owed me a huge amount of money so I had to send dh to go get it (he dressed in his motorcycle gear)she paid and he handed her a term letter.

, I have a mental picture of a hells angel looking guy with tattoos all over standing at her door!
::::::
I might need to borrow him!

[MarinaVanessa]

, I have a mental picture of a hells angel looking guy with tattoos all over standing at her door!
::::::
I might need to borrow him!

I was thinking the same thing ::::::.

Over time I learned to just not leave stuff out when the DC kids are here. Even the toys that are meant for DC are removed once a child breaks one from misuse. If one ruins something they all can't play with it. Sometimes it's just removed for the day and sometimes they don't get it back at all.

I stopped leaving regular book down because a few of the DCK's didn't bother reading them, they just wanted to tear them up. I stopped leaving them out and only left the infant board books out. And I'm not talking 2 yo's here, I'm talking 4 and 5 year olds that should know better .

[Blackcat31]

If kids break things here...they pay for a replacement. Mom, dad or anyone the DCK can get money from...I don't care....you break it, you replace it.

I have had parents say that wear and tear and toy breakage should just be part of the job. Well, not when some of these toys are things my children played with. My children are adults now so no way will I excuse a DCK from responsibility when something gets broken.

If a daycare parent allowed their child to be destructive or run amok at pick up, I will speak up and I don't mince words.

I have told a parent before that they need to step up or step out.

All pick ups and drop offs will be done outside if parents can't control their children.

I used to be a bit more passive aggressive about it but ya know, life is too short to dance around and hope and pray that certain parents will suddenly see the light.

Some just don't get it and need to hear it in no uncertain terms.

....and honestly if they get offended that I had to say something, too bad.

I would think it was from embarrassment as really, who wants to be told to do a better job at parenting their child??

[Blissful Kids]

I got a better story. I watched this very large girl (she was 5) she was the size of an 8 yr old child. Well the kids would go outside to play and one time she needed to go to the bathroom. So instead of opening the door nicely she ripped off the handle to the screen door, and I mean she was holding it in her hand. Dh was so mad. Mom apoligized but thats it. She broke so many toys too. I did term them but it wasn't for that, they owed me a huge amount of money so I had to send dh to go get it (he dressed in his motorcycle gear)she paid and he handed her a term letter.

This story is funny and sad at the same time! Glad your dh could help you out!

[Bookworm]

If kids break things here...they pay for a replacement. Mom, dad or anyone the DCK can get money from...I don't care....you break it, you replace it.

I have had parents say that wear and tear and toy breakage should just be part of the job. Well, not when some of these toys are things my children played with. My children are adults now so no way will I excuse a DCK from responsibility when something gets broken.

If a daycare parent allowed their child to be destructive or run amok at pick up, I will speak up and I don't mince words.

I have told a parent before that they need to step up or step out.

All pick ups and drop offs will be done outside if parents can't control their children.

I used to be a bit more passive aggressive about it but ya know, life is too short to dance around and hope and pray that certain parents will suddenly see the light.

Some just don't get it and need to hear it in no uncertain terms.

....and honestly if they get offended that I had to say something, too bad.

I would think it was from embarrassment as really, who wants to be told to do a better job at parenting their child??

Amen, sister.

[cheerfuldom]

its crazy what many parents i know will put up with. they also dont teach their kids how to play with toys....the kids dont know how to sit down and open a book nicely and that sort of thing. you really have to teach some kids EVERYTHING and if the parents dont do it, the daycare has to. many of my daycare families have a serious case of toy overload. their child has so many things that it is no big deal at all to throw away broken stuff because there are 10 other similar toys like that in the room still. my kids have all broken stuff but 95% of it was honest accidents. they are punished for purposely destroying things and I watch them like a hawk when we are in public or at someone elses house.

[Binkybobo]

I guess we could chalk it all up to parenting style(or lack there of). I just find it so hard to accpet that the majority of people in the world are not taking control of their children. Case and point, there is a lady that I once considered to be my best friend that i started avoiding becuase I was just annoyed by her kids! Our youngest children are 18 months apart. I remember my daughter being 2.5 years old, playing in this woman's living room. I would chase behind her and pick up toys, tell her we don't make a mess at other people's houses like this etc. I was teaching my child manners and she was 2. She understood, and for the most part was very respectful at her house, but not perfect of course. She never broke anything or tore the house apart. This woman's youngest is now 3, but she treats her like a baby! When they came to my house the little girl would tear out everything, go into my bedroom, unfold my clothes and things like this. her mom never told her to stop. She just told me that she(the mom) would clean it before they left! Really? Yeah, that's what I was thinking while I was cleaning and wasing clothes for hours that someone would come over with a 3 year old and let her unfold all of my clothes, and tear out all of the pieces to the board games, and that's all cool because the mom will clean it. No! I don't want it torn out! Period! At least make an effort to teach the child something! After working for 60 hours a week, and keeping my house fairly clean and sanitary I just couldn't deal with that. I just started avoiding my best friend.