The Tattle Tale What Do I Do

[slpender]

It goes on all day long. She just turned 3 and it is all she does all day. I talked to mom about it and she is doing it at home. She even tattles on the family pets. How do you make it stop?

Sharon

[laundrymom]

Ignore,

I listen and say ok, then move on like she didnt talk. If she isn't tattling I give extra attention.

[LaLa1923]

One provider I know set up a teddy bear and a phone. She told her kids they could use the phone to tell the bear everything they wanted her to hear. Then the bear would record it and tell her at the end of the day....

[countrymom]

I have a frog and I tell them to go tattle to the frog (he is motion sensored too so its so funny)

[crazydaycarelady]

I've been know to give a tattle tale a little time out for tattling.

I have one here that tattles on kids who aren't even here!

[slpender]

One provider I know set up a teddy bear and a phone. She told her kids they could use the phone to tell the bear everything they wanted her to hear. Then the bear would record it and tell her at the end of the day....

I will have to try this. I have lots of phone so she can tattle her little heart out with those.

[slpender]

I've been know to give a tattle tale a little time out for tattling.

I have one here that tattles on kids who aren't even here!

I have tried this bit I don't think she really understands why she is in time out.

[DaisyMamma]

Tattling is almost as annoying as "why?"

The problem with tattling is that you don't want to discourage important tattles, like "Johnny hit me with a truck". I have a 5 year old tattler, so lucky for me she is in school all day and only does it for the 1.5 hrs that she's here.... I try to explain each time that she needs to talk to *** about the problem, not me, because usually its a little girlie argument. It doesn't help! :: all I can say is that they grow out of it.

For a 3 year old tattler I would try the teddy bear thing. I'm actually going to try that on my 5 yo since she is very immature.

Let us know if you find something that works.

[makap]

When they first start doing this, I ask "Why are you telling me this!" This way you are able to teach what is acceptable telling and what is not! If it is just the annoying tattling I say I don't need to know that! Go play and ignore it. If it is legitimate I intervene. I explain to the child what is good to tell me and what is not.

After a while of doing this I then start to take the child away from their friends and have them play alone because what they are telling me is not important enough to come running to me.

The ones I have had that do this have learned quickly.
.

[SquirrellyMama]

I usually ask the child, "Are you trying to hurt or help with this information?" They of course will always say help but I talk through the difference and hopefully they understand eventually.

K

[Childminder]

I walk them into the mirror and tell them that they have to tell him/her all about it but no one else will listen. About three times is average to curtail them.

[MarinaVanessa]

It goes on all day long. She just turned 3 and it is all she does all day. I talked to mom about it and she is doing it at home. She even tattles on the family pets. How do you make it stop?

Sharon

For tattling I use the term "In or out?"

As in are you trying to get someon in trouble?

Or are you trying to keep someone out of trouble?

As in are you telling me that so-and-so is looking at you funny or breathing too hard or are you telling me that so-and-so pushed someone and can hurt someone so you want to keep that someone safe.

Immediately when a child starts with tha wail "Maaaaaarreeeeeeennnuuuuuhhhhh" I pretty much know what it's going to be and just say it "In or out?" and they stop to think about it. If it's an "In" I ask them to sit down and draw me a picture about what happened so that later we can sit down and talk about it. Making them work when they tattle and taking more time away from play starts to hit home pretty quickly and after a bit you see a big difference. I wish I could say that it will all completely go away but it won't ... they're kids ::

[Blackcat31]

Got this idea from a great provider friend, but we assigned one of our DCK's to be our "Complaint Department"

Our "Complaint Department" is 20 months old, LOVES to be talked to and definitely has an opinion and/or response to each complaint filed with him.

He is a wonderful addition to our staff.

Most the time tattling kids just want some one to listen to them or to have their feelings validated. Our "Complaint Department" serves that purpose perfectly.

Here are some other threads about tattling https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=tattling

[Country Kids]

What can you do with a tattler that just tattles. No one has done anything-they just make it up so they can tattle?

[MarinaVanessa]

What can you do with a tattler that just tattles. No one has done anything-they just make it up so they can tattle?

Ooooooh one of THOSE kids .

I like BC's idea but I'd feel bad for the child that to hear it all day ::.

We have Tattling Turtle which has been several different turtles over time. Right now he's a pillow pet. Tattling Turtle lives in the corner where the book nook is and sleeps in a basket. When a child needs a friend to talk to about nothing in general I redirect the child to Tattling Turtle.

Tattling Turtle is a great listener, never interupts when you are talking, never yells at you, has infinite patience and will never disagree with your opinion or make you feel bad about the way you feel. He also never tells anyone about what you two talked about and knows how to keep a secret.

The more and more I use the "In or Out" method, the less need for Tattling Turtle there is but there are some days when a DCK has a bad morning and just need someone to cuddle with and talk to.