Why Can't Parents Keep Sick Kids Home??!! Ugh!

[Bizzymom1111]

I'm seriously annoyed right now. Dcb1 1/2 came to dc yesterday and was super fussy ALL morning. At 10:45 am I took his temp and it was 100.5. My policy is anything over 100, then they stay home or go home. I texted mom to let her know, and to tell her to come pick him and brother up but when I went to check on dcb he had fallen asleep in his playpen. I told her I'd let him sleep, but she needed to come get him when he woke up. Then she tells me that oh yeah, he has been fussy the last couple of days, and probably getting a tooth. ( of course) So, she gets here and I hand him to her and she's like"oh, he seems fine now. He doesn't even feel hot!" ARGGGGGggghhhhh! Why do parents refuse to acknowledge when their children are sick? I told her he had a fever of 100.5 and that he needed to be fever free for 24 hours before she brought him back. Well.. 7am rolls around and "knock,knock!" guess who's back? I asked her if she had taken his temp this morning and she says" oh yeah, it was normal. But I gave him some Tylenol just to mAke sure." which in my experience means he had a temp and I don't want to stay home to deal with it. Great. Well then my own 2 yo was acting very cranky this am so I took his temp and sure enough, now he's got a temp. Seriously?! So I took dcb's temp again and it was 99.8 WITH Tylenol. I'm getting really p$@&%# off! There's no point in calling mom now bc he's down for a nap and she picks up at 3:00(which is shortly after dcb gets up). What should I say to her? I am so mad right now, but I'm also very bad at confrontations with parents. ( working on a backbone!) I was thinking of telling her she needs to keep the boys home tomorrow. (btw- she is county pay and is using daycare to "look" for work. I don't really believe she does that much during the day, so it shouldn't be too much trouble for her to stay home with the boys)
what do you all think I should say to her?

[JenNJ]

I would say, "DCM, Johnny's temp was 99.8 WITH Tylenol. He cannot retrn to daycare until he is fever free for 24 hours. Since he still has a fever now, he cannot come in tomorrow. Giving Tylenol before daycare is against policy. You can be terminated for that."

You aso need to let her know that a sick kid needs to be picked up ASAP. I dont care if they are napping, they need to GO. By letting him nap, you undermined yourself and your policies.

[Bizzymom1111]

I would say, "DCM, Johnny's temp was 99.8 WITH Tylenol. He cannot retrn to daycare until he is fever free for 24 hours. Since he still has a fever now, he cannot come in tomorrow. Giving Tylenol before daycare is against policy. You can be terminated for that."

You aso need to let her know that a sick kid needs to be picked up ASAP. I dont care if they are napping, they need to GO. By letting him nap, you undermined yourself and your policies.

You're right. I really need to work on sticking up for myself. What good is my policy if I can't enforce it right? Thanks for the reassurance!

[JenNJ]

Good for you!

I think most people honestly think "24 hours" means missing that half a day at daycare. Ummm, no. If I call you at 9am or 4pm bc your kid is sick, I do NOT want that kid here the next day. I always say, "Hope you feel better Johnny - see you in a few days!" to drive it int hat they are NOT welcome the following day.

[JJPlaycare]

I struggle with a backbone, but what I has worked for me is taking the blame off of me and MY POLICIES and just say "that is the DAYCARE rules he has to leave if he has a fever and I cannot keep him here and he has to be fever free for 24 hours because of the DAYCARE policies within our county!! I blame it on our county/state daycare guidelines and take the pressure completely off of myself! I just say that is the rules and it is just a safety precaution to keep everyone healthy!

[professionalmom]

Now that I'm no longer doing daycare, I would love to give you a little of my backbone, ladies. Trust me, you NEED it in this business. And remember, there is no one else to enforce your policies except YOU!

[MARSTELAC]

I struggle with a backbone, but what I has worked for me is taking the blame off of me and MY POLICIES and just say "that is the DAYCARE rules he has to leave if he has a fever and I cannot keep him here and he has to be fever free for 24 hours because of the DAYCARE policies within our county!! I blame it on our county/state daycare guidelines and take the pressure completely off of myself! I just say that is the rules and it is just a safety precaution to keep everyone healthy!

Good a.m. I see you are a MN provider. I cannot find anywhere in our statute that indicates a child must stay home for 24 hours after fever is gone without benefit of fever-reducing medications. The law is clear, however, for communicable disease. I want to change my contract to say the kids must stay home after the fever...will I be within my rights to do so? I would also like to add something that says I can decide if I think kids need to have a doctors' note to come back to care but not sure about that. I am having this issue constantly and it is not fair to me or the other families in my care. The parents tell me that the kids are not contagious or have a tooth/sinus issue and brush it all under the rug. I have even been told I am not a doctor when I suggest that a child might have XYZ illness....frustrating....

[misol]

Good a.m. I see you are a MN provider. I cannot find anywhere in our statute that indicates a child must stay home for 24 hours after fever is gone without benefit of fever-reducing medications. The law is clear, however, for communicable disease. I want to change my contract to say the kids must stay home after the fever...will I be within my rights to do so? I would also like to add something that says I can decide if I think kids need to have a doctors' note to come back to care but not sure about that. I am having this issue constantly and it is not fair to me or the other families in my care. The parents tell me that the kids are not contagious or have a tooth/sinus issue and brush it all under the rug. I have even been told I am not a doctor when I suggest that a child might have XYZ illness....frustrating....

Hi Marstelac, I am not in MN but from what JJPlaycare wrote, it looks like the regs may differ from county to county in MN? Here, we can be more restrictive than state regs require as long as we follow at least the minimum requirements. For example, if our state regs say that a child is to be sent home if they vomit more than twice, my own policies can say they will be sent home if they vomit more than once.

As someone mentioned in another post, you can change your contract at any time you want. You just need to give the parents a letter or addendum and have them sign it and attach it to their original contract. It's customary to give two weeks notice for most changes but for something like an illness policy I would make the change effective immediately.

If you PM me I'd be happy to send you a copy of my illness policy.

[broncomom1973]

I have only been doing daycare 1-1/2 years, but am amazed at the lack of parental knowledge when it comes to children and fevers. Before I started doing daycare, I was the lab nurse at a family practice clinic and I was the nurse who did nasal swabs to check for influenza A or B, I also did strep tests and tested children for RSV. I NEVER sent my girls to daycare when they were ill. Last year during the H1N1 outbreak, I had a mom bring her son to daycare without telling me that he had been running a fever. By afternoon (after his medicine had worn off and he woke up from his nap) he was running 103. I told her that our county had 1 confirmed case of H1N1 and that if there was 1 case, there were many more that were not confirmed yet. That night her son ran 104, he was only 8 months old and she took him to the ER. The next day they did the influenza swab which came back as influenza A which I knew was indicative of H1N1 since it was too early here for the seasonal influenza A. He was hospitalized with pnuemonia and I was soooo mad that all of these other children were exposed to such a deadly illness because she didnt want to miss work and did not mention to me that he was febrile and that she had given him medicine. I am very strict here about fevers and keeping children home. When a child is sick, they dont want to be hauled off to daycare, they want to be home with their mommy who can give them all the love and attention they need.

I also get the "I think he/she is teething" alot. Actually, I think that is what this mom told me before dcb was diagnosed with H1N1.

[marniewon]

Good a.m. I see you are a MN provider. I cannot find anywhere in our statute that indicates a child must stay home for 24 hours after fever is gone without benefit of fever-reducing medications. The law is clear, however, for communicable disease. I want to change my contract to say the kids must stay home after the fever...will I be within my rights to do so? I would also like to add something that says I can decide if I think kids need to have a doctors' note to come back to care but not sure about that. I am having this issue constantly and it is not fair to me or the other families in my care. The parents tell me that the kids are not contagious or have a tooth/sinus issue and brush it all under the rug. I have even been told I am not a doctor when I suggest that a child might have XYZ illness....frustrating....

Don't you love it when dcp brings child and they are clearly sick, but tell you they are not contagious? And then by the next few days, everyone has the same "non-contagious" symptoms the original child had!! BTDT!

You can make up any rule that you want, so if you can't find anything to back you up regarding fever, you can still say that your dc is a healthy dc and you require fever free 24 hours before returning to dc.

You could put something in your contract about "repeat offenders" bringing child sick repeatedly: I reserve the right to ask for a doctor's note before returning to care if child repeatedly shows signs of illness while in daycare". And then do it. You should only have to call parents ONCE per illness to come get the child. If they know they will have to go to doctor to bring child back to dc, they may think twice about drugging them and bringing them. So, first day, MOM, Johnny has a fever, please come get him. Day 2: no child at care (if they try to bring him, remind them of your 24 hour policy and don't let them leave him). Day 3: they bring him "fever-free" and medicine wears off after 4 hours: MOM, Johnny still has a fever, please come get him. I hope he's feeling better soon, but he cannot come back to daycare until he has been checked by a doctor and has a doctor's note saying he is well enough to return.

Good luck!

[Bizzymom1111]

Hi-I'm actually the op, and in mn! As far as I know, you can make your policies as you see fit regarding illness. After all, it is YOUR business. The counties just set guidelines. But I have to say, I have been working on my backbone ALOT! I seem to have one mom that makes me use it regularly( same one as in my op), and because of her I have changed my illness policy to be way more specific and strict. It really p's me off how some parents just don't get it. KEEP YOUR SICK KID HOME!!!!!! Because if you don't, then all the other kids will most likely get it, then I'll close. Geesh, what's so hard to understand? And from what I'm finding, you could seriously put as many rules and policies in there that you want, but unless YOU constantly remind them, some parents will not follow it. ARGGGGgggghhhhh! Sorry, this kind of turned into a vent! Just one of those days!

[MarinaVanessa]

I have it in my policies that the child has to be fever free for 24 hours before returning to daycare WITHOUT THE AID OF MEDICATION. I have one DCM that just does not get ANYTHING! I'm having trouble with her right now with something else but the fever issue has come up and I had to repeat myself over and over trying to explain the Symptoms for Exclusion.

She was one of those that gives medicine and then told me she gave him medicine and then that his fever broke. Um ... no. I had to explain in the simplest of terms that a Fever Reducer does exactly and only that, reduces the fever. It masks the symptom so that the child can feel better but it does NOT cure the child of whatever is wrong with him/her. Giving the child a fever reducer and then saying that his fever broke is rediculous, no it hasn't broken ... it's just being masked.

I also blame it on our licensing regulations. I have a flyer that was given to me by our child refferal agency that says "You should keep your child home if ...." and then list all of the symptoms for exclusion that I now hand out in their Parent Packets every year along with their renewed contracts and handbooks.

I just say " [Johny] has a fever of .... He needs to be taken home and can't come back to daycare until he has been fever free for 24 hours without the help of any medication. I'll see you [Johny] as early as (if it's Monday) Wednesday if you're fever is all gone tomorrow and you feel all better." And then tell the parent that I'll call [Johny] later and the next day to see how he is doing. The kids always tell you if their parent has given them medication .

[Bizzymom1111]

He needs to be taken home and can't come back to daycare until he has been fever free for 24 hours without the help of any medication. I'll see you [Johny] as early as (if it's Monday) Wednesday if you're fever is all gone tomorrow and you feel all better.


That is a great way to say that, MarinaVanesa!! I just had that kind of situation come up today. Same dcm(as op) picked up dcb bc he was throwing up yesterday am, and I have it in my policy too about 24 hours of no fever, vomiting, and diarrhea, and she was back this am, saying he was just fine yesterday at home. Argggggggghhhhh! I wasn't wearing my backbone when she dropped him off, so he's still here.