Do You Think Its A Bad Idea To List Termination Reasons?

[DaycareMama]

Do you think its a bad idea to list termination reasons in a letter? I have to give one very soon to a PITA parent. The boy has broken several of my contracts reasons for dismissal and mom and dad are just not hearing it. However I fear that with this family it will turn personal..... so exactly how much do you put in the termination letter?

[SunshineMama]

I keep it minimal and simple. I figure, theres no need to add fuel to the fire. The last parent I terminated still had issues, even though I gave my pregnancy as the reason for the termination. They were blind to the issues that I had addressed for months on end and were in denial. But I'm a sugar-coater

However, it's probably best to list reasons. That way, when they are terminated again by the next person, maybe they will see the actual issue and make a step toward correcting it.

[renodeb]

I have all the reasons listed in my contract under termination of care by provider and that covers it. The few kids I have had to term well the parents all new the reasons. I still get them a written letter to provide closure and documentation on both our ends! Its up to them to tell the truth when looking for a new dc!
Deb

[MarinaVanessa]

For PITA or drama DCP's I find that beating around the bush works best. That or making it so that they terminate care and so they feel like it was their decision. For example, as I posted in a previous post I used to have a DCM that refused to follow any policies that inconvenienced her.

Eventually I stuck to my guns and stopped offering certain services that she usually requested like staying later on some days or even charging exuberant prices for other services like I charged her $10 an hour for weekend childcare. Since she needed evening and weekend care but on a drop-in basis "she" decided that she needed to go elsewhere and terminated her contract with me. She still doesn't see it as a way of me pushing her out, she firmly believes that I no longer met her needs . This was a drama DCM that once she signed up I found out had turned in another DC provider in for things and left her without notice. Deffinetely didn't want to rock the boat with her.

I have terminated other DCP's because they had 2 children which cried all the time but I used the excuse that I took on more than I could chew and since they were my newest clients I had to let them go. My DH worked as the IT guy for the company that DCM worked for and would see her on a weekly basis and she was also a drama momma so I didn't want her bad mouthing either me or DH either. That ended up working out very well and DCM used the excuse that she no longer had childcare she could trust as a reason to stay home with her kids.

So if the parents are drama parents it's probably best to leave things as vague as possible. And it's probably a good idea to call licensing and give them the heads up before you term. You never know when that can come in handy.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

We've either helped the family terminate themselves (we cannot accommodate XYZ or XYZ needs to change in order for your child to be able to attend), or have given a reason. The actual letter is very brief and to the point, but I do verbally tell them.

1. Because he was strangling/pinching/hitting/punching/kicking me.

2. Because the parents failed to abide by the policies.

3. Because I am in charge of my business and don't wish to answer to someone demanding me to do things.

Others that I would have had to term I did before I ever enrolled them. I refused to accept late tours or reschedule. Everyone we have had come late or attempt to reschedule after they were a no call/no show turned out to be a whackadoo. All 8+ of them ... and we feel happy. happyface

[allsmiles]

We've either helped the family terminate themselves (we cannot accommodate XYZ or XYZ needs to change in order for your child to be able to attend), or have given a reason. The actual letter is very brief and to the point, but I do verbally tell them.

1. Because he was strangling/pinching/hitting/punching/kicking me.

2. Because the parents failed to abide by the policies.

3. Because I am in charge of my business and don't wish to answer to someone demanding me to do things.

Others that I would have had to term I did before I ever enrolled them. I refused to accept late tours or reschedule. Everyone we have had come late or attempt to reschedule after they were a no call/no show turned out to be a whackadoo. All 8+ of them ... and we feel happy. happyface

hmmm..this reasoning makes sense!!..only been in business a few mnths and the one i pushed into terming herself WAS a no show that later rescheduled her tour..

[littlemissmuffet]

I generally give as little reason as possible. I don't want to discuss or argue a termination - I just want the parent to know that services will end on such and such a date. End of story. If they ask, I will usually give the simple reply of "I just feel we're no longer a good match for eachother's needs".

[cheerfuldom]

I just termed a drama family and told them I was cutting back and could no longer offer them part time care. Which is true but far from the only reason I let them go

[DaycareMama]

Thanks guys. I did my letter with a little help from (blackcat ) And I feel so much better..

Termination isn't something I do very often at all and I hate conflict. So this was VERY hard for me. But I know in the long run it will be worth it.

Im sad to see my little buddy go and wish them all the best

[Lucy]

Thanks guys. I did my letter with a little help from (blackcat ) And I feel so much better..

Termination isn't something I do very often at all and I hate conflict. So this was VERY hard for me. But I know in the long run it will be worth it.

Im sad to see my little buddy go and wish them all the best

Any chance you could post the wording of your letter here? I have a similar circumstance. This family is a PITA. Not because they break rules, not because they're late with payments. But they have changed their days and hours of care at least a dozen times since they started 18 mos ago. The 2 girls now come a total of 30 hours per week. Not each... that's the total for both. I could be okay with that, but the younger one is sick A LOT -- she's just one of those kids who picks up colds easily, and has had the croup 3 or 4 times in the 18 months they've been here. This time around, 2 of the other kids ended up with croup over Thanksgiving! I felt horrible! It's contagious before symptoms show, so it's not the parents' fault. It's more just the FACT that she's sick often, that is making me want to term this family. As well as the issue about their hours constantly changing and I have to re-do that page of their contract every time.

Anyway, I've rambled and hi-jacked this thread! It's just that in reading your situation, it made me start thinking about what I would write in a letter to term this family. I mean, I could just say I can no longer offer part time care I suppose, but I just feel nervous about it. The dad is a military guy and the mom is nothing but nice. Not demanding, never argues, appreciates me up and down, etc. That being said, they're still a PITA!! If I could see your wording, it might help me write out something for them. I wouldn't do it till after the first of the year most likely.

Thanks! And sorry for the hi-jack!!

[Lucy]

Daycare Mama??

(just pushing the post up so she'll see my request)

[Lucy]

I'll PM you.

[DaycareMama]

Hi sorry just saw your request for a copy. I will pm you what I had wrote

[Lucy]

Thank you so much. I never got around to PM'ing you, so thanks!