Porch Pick Up?

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Has anyone ever had to implement porch pick up before? I remember NannyDy (spelling?) suggesting it, but since she isn't here anymore I was wondering if others had advice when it came to it.

I have told a parent that if another incident occurs, we will be implementing porch pick up. I am absolutely, 100% sure that I offended her despite wording it very kindly and making it more about the child's safety. Is there any way to make it LESS offensive? How long does it take children to snap out of the bad pick-up behavior (or do some require porch pick up forever)? The bad behavior is only when I am the one handing him off to Mom. When my husband does, he is absolutely fine. We know he is capable of it, but despite my attempts to nip it in the bud it has not ceased.

[Blackcat31]

Has anyone ever had to implement porch pick up before? I remember NannyDy (spelling?) suggesting it, but since she isn't here anymore I was wondering if others had advice when it came to it.

I have told a parent that if another incident occurs, we will be implementing porch pick up. I am absolutely, 100% sure that I offended her despite wording it very kindly and making it more about the child's safety. Is there any way to make it LESS offensive? How long does it take children to snap out of the bad pick-up behavior (or do some require porch pick up forever)? The bad behavior is only when I am the one handing him off to Mom. When my husband does, he is absolutely fine. We know he is capable of it, but despite my attempts to nip it in the bud it has not ceased.

You can soften it by telling the parent it is a great way to build self-help and independent skills for the child.

I know the parents may not be too keen on the idea but if pick ups are that awful, then why should you have to put up with it.

Tell the parent you fully understand how it sounds bad, which I don;t think it does but can see how a parent would or could be offended by it though, but you just can't let one child's bad behavior be influential to the others in care.

Pick ups and drop offs should be a smooth transistion and when they aren't it sets the stage for a bad day or night and I can't see either parent or provider wanting that.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Yesterday I had to implement time away right as Mom arrived due to failure to listen to my instructions (which is typical when the child knows Mom is there) and it went over like a lead balloon.
I had gotten away from having to be present during pick ups for awhile, but it truly is unavoidable at times and I shouldn't have to avoid it.

[Blackcat31]

I, personally would say something to a parent about managing their child's behavior at pick up and drop off and I wouldn't mince words.

I FULLY expect parents to be their child's ultimate authority and if they can't I will say to them to pick up the child and leave please.

I know you struggle with not being so black and white but perhaps that is exactly what this situation calls for.

It isn't fair to you, the other kids and the child that the parent doesn't step up and control their child.

If the child starts acting up, hand ALL belongings to the parent and basically usher them out the door while saying "Well it looks like Timmy has forgotten the rules in my home and you are not enforcing them so I will need to you to take him immediately to your car as I will not allow this behavior to continue in my home. See you in the morning. Have a nice night." then smile really big and close the door.

My handbook states:

Transition times such as drop off and pick-up can be a difficult time for children. Please try to make these times as short as possible. If there are things you need to discuss with me, please call and set up a time where we can talk uninterrupted.

If your child is experiencing any separation anxiety issues, please rest assured that I will do everything necessary to welcome your child and make their transition from parent to childcare a comfortable and pleasant one. If your child does not calm down and join the rest of the group within a reasonable amount of time, you will be called to assist or pick up if necessary.

Behavior for some children during these times can result in needing to be disciplined. Should this occur, you will need to be the one in charge. As your child's parent, you need to be the ultimate authority. If it becomes necessary for me to step in and discipline your child, alternate drop off/pick up routines will be discussed.

[Willow]

It was out of desperation that I found this forum....and the very solution for my ugly/scary pick up/drop off problem family

https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=45854

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I, personally would say something to a parent about managing their child's behavior at pick up and drop off and I wouldn't mince words.

I FULLY expect parents to be their child's ultimate authority and if they can't I will say to them to pick up the child and leave please.

I know you struggle with not being so black and white but perhaps that is exactly what this situation calls for.

It isn't fair to you, the other kids and the child that the parent doesn't step up and control their child.

If the child starts acting up, hand ALL belongings to the parent and basically usher them out the door while saying "Well it looks like Timmy has forgotten the rules in my home and you are not enforcing them so I will need to you to take him immediately to your car as I will not allow this behavior to continue in my home. See you in the morning. Have a nice night." then smile really big and close the door.

My handbook states:

Transition times such as drop off and pick-up can be a difficult time for children. Please try to make these times as short as possible. If there are things you need to discuss with me, please call and set up a time where we can talk uninterrupted.

If your child is experiencing any separation anxiety issues, please rest assured that I will do everything necessary to welcome your child and make their transition from parent to childcare a comfortable and pleasant one. If your child does not calm down and join the rest of the group within a reasonable amount of time, you will be called to assist or pick up if necessary.

Behavior for some children during these times can result in needing to be disciplined. Should this occur, you will need to be the one in charge. As your child's parent, you need to be the ultimate authority. If it becomes necessary for me to step in and discipline your child, alternate drop off/pick up routines will be discussed.

The last time the child tried to hit me when they were in Mom's arms, I said, "We do not hit Mrs. ___. Good-bye X." and walked away.