What To Do With An 11 Month Old BAD Baby???

[Megan]

Hi! I'm new here. I have been doing home daycare for a little over 10 years now.
I currently have a DC baby who is going to be 1 yr. old next month. I've had him since the beginning of August 2012. He is a full time child, meaning he's with me about 9 hrs, 5 days a week... pretty much every single week. He has proven to be such a challenging child so far, and I just don't know what else to do! I feel like I've given ample adjustment time. I even talked with the mother a month ago letting her know my concerns with him not soothing himself, not napping on his own, and etc. She acted as if she was on board and claims to be "trying" to help with this at home.... but, I really do not see any improvement a month after the "intervention".
He is a breastfed baby... WILL NOT take a bottle, cup, pacifier, or ANYTHING. This is very frustrating. Just getting liquids down him is a fight. He will eat solid foods, but will not drink anything. He will only nap, most days, for 20-30 minutes... then SCREAMS the rest of the nap period. My other 4 two year olds nap at least 2 hours! I've had to turn up the lullaby music and add a fan just to drown out the baby's screaming- the baby is upstairs in a room w/the door shut, and the others are downstairs in a room with the door shut. I'm so frustrated. He should be napping way more than 30 minutes ONCE A DAY!!! I don't know what to do! I don't rock him, never have. I am not sure if they still are at home or not, or nursing him to sleep... I had asked them to work with him on that.
What should I do about this child!?!?! Terminate, give more time, just put up with the constant screaming and deal with it, or WHAT???????!!!!!! I just don't want to look like a "you know what" to the parents, or make them mad.

[Michael]

Welcome to the Daycare.com Forum! I upgraded your status. You can post freely now.

[nanglgrl]

This may be silly but since he is breastfed you may want to ask mom for an unwashed shirt that she has worn recently. When you are trying to get him to drink a bottle put the shirt in between your body and his. His sleeping issues may be cause by being hungry and this may help with that.

[cheerfuldom]

so he has had more than two full months adjustment period? since you have 10 years experience, I doubt there is a whole bunch we can say that you havent already tried. not all kids adjust well to daycare and I think that could be the case here. you could try one more go with mom and make sure that he can both take a bottle and nap on his own before returning....make mom take a week off to deal with the issues and solve them permanently. or just term. I would imagine that mom is nursing on demand and nursing to sleep, possibly co sleeping and that could be why baby is just not wanting to adjust. he just catches up on milk and sleep at home and every day with you is miserable. have you asked mom direct questions about what he can and cannot do? saying "we are working on it at home" is way to vague and not cutting it at this point.

[Lyss]

I would imagine that mom is nursing on demand and nursing to sleep, possibly co sleeping and that could be why baby is just not wanting to adjust. he just catches up on milk and sleep at home and every day with you is miserable. have you asked mom direct questions about what he can and cannot do? saying "we are working on it at home" is way to vague and not cutting it at this point.

I agree with this

I had an infant that screamed all day, barely ate, and never napped more than thirty minutes max. She screamed every minute she was here for 2 months, I nearly terminated her but her parents were very devoted to making it work. If they hadn't been I can guarantee she wouldn't be here today. But now she's a great kid! Plays, sleeps 1 1/2 to 2 hours twice a day and best of all I can walk away without her screaming. I really had to be firm with DCPs and make a plan on what exactly we were going to do together. They worked on not holding her 24/7, not nursing to sleep, and getting a routine going. i also changed up the area she slept in; blackout blinds and waterfall music (relatively loud) were success for her!

On the eating can you mix breast milk into infant cereal maybe? So at least he's getting it? Also my DCPs tried another type of bottle and that helped DCG started eating better.

It's really up to what you can handle, if my DCG had not adjusted when she did I wouldn't have her because I was getting so frustrated and it was affecting the other kids in my care, plus I felt just terrible for her crying all day.