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So im watching this new child today. she is 3 years old. she was talking while playing. telling me about how her mommy doesnt like her. how her daddy loves her. and then she said that daddy hit mommy and hurt her. So now i feel uncomfortable. I dont know what to do. anyone have any ideas?
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Ugh....This is one of those touchy subjects where you have to be VERY careful so as not to overreact or cross any lines.
I would continue to listen to the child as she plays over the next couple of weeks. If she continues to say things like that, it may be necessary to call CPS....although the child is not indicating that she herself is being abused, domestic violence can lead to abuse of the child, murder/suicide, etc. and would be considered emotional abuse. Of course, if it sounds urgent, you should not wait two weeks and report as needed.
In the meantime, do you have a parent resource area? If not, I would go about setting one up and include resources from local agencies....do you have WEAVE (women escaping a violent environment) in your area? If not, there should be a smiliar agency that you can print or order resources from. After you have it all set up, introduce it to the parents so they know that the resources are there for them to take.
Good luck, and please keep us posted. -
Thanks for the advice. The girls grandma and dad met me last night. they said they are the ONLY two people who would be picking up the girl and no other person would have rights to that. So it makes me question the mothers role. they made it sound to me that he was a widow, as he said. due to the loss of my wife. So im not even sure what to think. but the little girl gets here and keeps saying over and over she wants daddy and i want mommy.Comment
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don't be afraid to ask the dad. Explain to him what the girl is saying. Maybe her mom did pass away and she's having a hard time.Comment
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My heart goes out to the little girl.Comment
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Domestic Violence
I just lost 3 children this past Tuesday due to domestic violence. The mother was being abused by her husband and they just had a baby girl who I cared for up to she was 3 months old. The mother left work during her lunch break and picked up her oldest from school and then the two who were in my care and headed to her family out of state. She explained that she was tired of it and he was threatening to kill the entire family. He chocked her to the point of unconsciousness 2 months ago and it was then that she knew that he could have killed her. According to her, she never walked away from it until she realize that she wasn’t being the best mother for her young boys who watched him abuse her the night before she left town. SHE SIMPLY GOT TIRED OF IT..
There was no way for me to know that this was going on in their family. She hid it well, and I didn’t even notice that her face was swollen until she told me what happened the night before.
In the state of Texas, we are required by law to report any form of child abuse or neglect within 48 hours of the time that it is suspected. Texas defines abuse as being mental, emotional, physical or sexual injury to a child or failure to prevent such injury.
Is it possible that the child may be harmed mentally or emotional as the result of witnessing the physical abuse of his mother in the hands of her father? In the end, it will be up to the authorities to make the final decision on the matter but as a provider we have to protect our children. In Texas IT’S THE LAW! 1.) write down everything you hear, see ect in detail. Exactly what happened, (who-when-when-where and how). Check your regulation guidelines that govern your business and don’t be afraid to seek advice from your inspector or abuse hotline. Most of the time these agencies allow people to leave anonymous information.
My belief is that children are like blank slates and learned behaviors can be reenacted during play time. Even if they are not able to fully tell you verbally what is happening in their home. Its not a coincidence that this behavior is showing up in play time.Comment
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