Old DCK's A Nightmare At Drop Off

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

I have a 4yr old dcg that has been with me for 2 years, that has just started screaming and crying at drop off. To the point that I have had to hold her down until she is done. she flails and screams and kicks and scratches at the front door, then all of a sudden its like someone flicked a switch and she is laughing. :confused:

DCD said in a joking way, you must be beating her or something!
Umm yes, everyday.

The dcb who is 21 mos, has been here for almost a year does the same thing, to his mom until she closes the door and he's done.

Im not sure what is going on and Im starting to feel bad and Im sure that it doesnt make me look good either.

Any opinions???

[lovemykidstoo]

Unfortunately, I have had this quite a bit and it drives me nuts. These kids play their parents like a fiddle. Usually when it happens (well almost every time) by the time the parents are to their car, the child has stopped crying. I have shortened the time that the parents are here dropping off, I have told the parent not to even come into the house, I just open the door and take the child by the hand and close the door without even conversating with the parent. The less attention you give it the better. I have also told the parent that after 20 seconds to open the door and listen. They will hear how fast the child recovers. This might work in your case with the dad making that goofy comment about how you must beat him. Maybe if he hears how fast the child recovers he will feel better. It is very hard, but the kids seem to want to make the parent feel bad for some reason.

[rhymia1]

At 4, she has seen the younger child do it and get attention. Now she wants it too! I would walk out to the car in the AM, have mom hand you her/her stuff (with a cheerful good bye!) and walk her into your house. If she starts the screaming business, I would put her in a soft spot and let her have at it, but ignore the behavior. I would obviously keep and eye on her, but not make eye contact or say anything.
This is nothing on you. This is something the child will have to work through. Good luck!

[Angelsj]

I have a window to the front porch. Sometimes, I will tell a parent, "Pause just out of sight and listen in the window." They generally leave smiling when they realize the tears stop within seconds.

[BABYLUVER]

I have had this problem twice. After one of the parents left because she assumed (wrongfully) that I must have been doing something wrong, I always told the parents "Drop & leave" It worked so well and had no problems with any of the dc children after that.