OT: Disgusting.....And I Thought The FIRST One Was Appalling!?

[daycare]

I am a little lost in this.

Where I come from you can nurse your child in public, but (when I lived there) you had to be very discreet about it and turn your back. You had to cover up and most of the time could not do it in the presence of men.

I have traveled all over the world, many many countries. I have NEVER seen something like this ever except in third world countries where food is so scarce, that breastfeeding all of your children for as long as you can is normal.

I guess it is common to see things like this womans performance on the cover of a magazine, because it is the USA. I have never been exposed to stuff like this before..

I don't find it disgusting, I just find it strange to me.

[Blackcat31]

Completely agree.

I personally could care less what others do, UNTIL they shove it in my face.

The Times, as well as this woman, had an obvious agenda. I understand that's the medias sole purpose, to shock, but they had no right to drag a minor into their propaganda. A minor who has no clue or say into how this is going to affect his future I might add.


Want to add that what is done elsewhere in the world really isn't a valid argument, nor is it ever. In other places in the world children are bought and sold, they starve to death, they die of preventable diseases, female genital mutation is practiced and parents can leave newborns outside of restaurants during winter in prams unattended. So using what is common or even occasional practice/occurrence world wide to support an argument such as this really doesn't hold an ounce of water. In THIS country, it isn't even close to common practice and it's going to take a whole lot more than "well it happens far far away" to make it come off as wholesome, beneficial and normal.

To be clear, I'm not saying that simply because it isn't common in our society makes it wrong, but that's definitely where the opposition comes from. It IS unusual, whether EBF moms and those who support them want to admit it or not. That's exactly why the topic made the Times cover. Sociology dictates what is considered normal. If it was a meatloaf and potatoes topic they never would have considered having it in the magazine much less throwing it a COVER. It's bizarre practice HERE, within OUR widespread social group as a nation. It was especially big news here and by no surprise. When it hit the news people were hollaring not only "gross" but "ABUSE." I am the only woman I know, even thinking back through my childhood, who nursed her children save for two daycare moms I've had just recently. Breastfeeding in and of itself is uncommon enough but EBF is literally unheard of and yes, considered repulsive and completely unnecessary. I personally was well aware of it but didn't see the use in EBF so I didn't do it with my kids, but holy buckets my eyes about pop when women on the internet try to claim it's normal and practiced everywhere in most families....as if central MN is Mars



I don't buy either that the woman was merely "naive" as she claims now. No woman with half a brain in her head would exploit her child and expose herself the way she did for a nationwide publication without having a good idea of how it's going to be presented. I call bull at her claim the original photograph wasn't posed for when it obviously was. No one stands like that, with a child at her breast, hand on hip and both staring at a camera. That "tee-hee I had no idea!" is damage control for the movement at best and a flat out lie at worst. I think she went in fierce, ticked off a bunch of non-BF mothers and families, the article ostracized BF as a practice by coming across too judgmental and now she is trying to call herself a victim?? Right......you did it, you felt it was the right thing to do, now own it.

And apologize for dragging your son through the mud along side of you while you're at it......

Nicely put

[rhymia1]

Completely agree.

I personally could care less what others do, UNTIL they shove it in my face.

The Times, as well as this woman, had an obvious agenda. I understand that's the medias sole purpose, to shock, but they had no right to drag a minor into their propaganda. A minor who has no clue or say into how this is going to affect his future I might add.


Want to add that what is done elsewhere in the world really isn't a valid argument, nor is it ever. In other places in the world children are bought and sold, they starve to death, they die of preventable diseases, female genital mutation is practiced and parents can leave newborns outside of restaurants during winter in prams unattended. So using what is common or even occasional practice/occurrence world wide to support an argument such as this really doesn't hold an ounce of water. In THIS country, it isn't even close to common practice and it's going to take a whole lot more than "well it happens far far away" to make it come off as wholesome, beneficial and normal.

To be clear, I'm not saying that simply because it isn't common in our society makes it wrong, but that's definitely where the opposition comes from. It IS unusual, whether EBF moms and those who support them want to admit it or not. That's exactly why the topic made the Times cover. Sociology dictates what is considered normal. If it was a meatloaf and potatoes topic they never would have considered having it in the magazine much less throwing it a COVER. It's bizarre practice HERE, within OUR widespread social group as a nation. It was especially big news here and by no surprise. When it hit the news people were hollaring not only "gross" but "ABUSE." I am the only woman I know, even thinking back through my childhood, who nursed her children save for two daycare moms I've had just recently. Breastfeeding in and of itself is uncommon enough but EBF is literally unheard of and yes, considered repulsive and completely unnecessary. I personally was well aware of it but didn't see the use in EBF so I didn't do it with my kids, but holy buckets my eyes about pop when women on the internet try to claim it's normal and practiced everywhere in most families....as if central MN is Mars



I don't buy either that the woman was merely "naive" as she claims now. No woman with half a brain in her head would exploit her child and expose herself the way she did for a nationwide publication without having a good idea of how it's going to be presented. I call bull at her claim the original photograph wasn't posed for when it obviously was. No one stands like that, with a child at her breast, hand on hip and both staring at a camera. That "tee-hee I had no idea!" is damage control for the movement at best and a flat out lie at worst. I think she went in fierce, ticked off a bunch of non-BF mothers and families, the article ostracized BF as a practice by coming across too judgmental and now she is trying to call herself a victim?? Right......you did it, you felt it was the right thing to do, now own it.

And apologize for dragging your son through the mud along side of you while you're at it......

This I can agree with.

[makap]

Completely agree.

I personally could care less what others do, UNTIL they shove it in my face.

The Times, as well as this woman, had an obvious agenda. I understand that's the medias sole purpose, to shock, but they had no right to drag a minor into their propaganda. A minor who has no clue or say into how this is going to affect his future I might add.


Want to add that what is done elsewhere in the world really isn't a valid argument, nor is it ever. In other places in the world children are bought and sold, they starve to death, they die of preventable diseases, female genital mutation is practiced and parents can leave newborns outside of restaurants during winter in prams unattended. So using what is common or even occasional practice/occurrence world wide to support an argument such as this really doesn't hold an ounce of water. In THIS country, it isn't even close to common practice and it's going to take a whole lot more than "well it happens far far away" to make it come off as wholesome, beneficial and normal.

To be clear, I'm not saying that simply because it isn't common in our society makes it wrong, but that's definitely where the opposition comes from. It IS unusual, whether EBF moms and those who support them want to admit it or not. That's exactly why the topic made the Times cover. Sociology dictates what is considered normal. If it was a meatloaf and potatoes topic they never would have considered having it in the magazine much less throwing it a COVER. It's bizarre practice HERE, within OUR widespread social group as a nation. It was especially big news here and by no surprise. When it hit the news people were hollaring not only "gross" but "ABUSE." I am the only woman I know, even thinking back through my childhood, who nursed her children save for two daycare moms I've had just recently. Breastfeeding in and of itself is uncommon enough but EBF is literally unheard of and yes, considered repulsive and completely unnecessary. I personally was well aware of it but didn't see the use in EBF so I didn't do it with my kids, but holy buckets my eyes about pop when women on the internet try to claim it's normal and practiced everywhere in most families....as if central MN is Mars



I don't buy either that the woman was merely "naive" as she claims now. No woman with half a brain in her head would exploit her child and expose herself the way she did for a nationwide publication without having a good idea of how it's going to be presented. I call bull at her claim the original photograph wasn't posed for when it obviously was. No one stands like that, with a child at her breast, hand on hip and both staring at a camera. That "tee-hee I had no idea!" is damage control for the movement at best and a flat out lie at worst. I think she went in fierce, ticked off a bunch of non-BF mothers and families, the article ostracized BF as a practice by coming across too judgmental and now she is trying to call herself a victim?? Right......you did it, you felt it was the right thing to do, now own it.

And apologize for dragging your son through the mud along side of you while you're at it......

[DBug]

ITA with Willow too! Well put!

The reaction has been exactly what this mom was going for. But just like the mom awhile back that blogged about leaving her 8-week-old baby, this mom is using her child to create a platform for her own opinions and agenda. If she's that dedicated, there are far more ways to get your point across besides putting your child in an embarrassing situation like that.

I wonder what the reaction would be if the boy had a baby bottle in his mouth instead of a breast?

Idk, my very humble opinion is that if a child is at the age when a baby bottle would no longer be appropriate, than neither would breastfeeding. Neither is wrong or disgusting, it just isn't appropriate after a certain age.

Ftr, I breastfed all three of my kids and loved every minute of it (even the painful ones ).

[AmyLeigh]

Completely agree.

I personally could care less what others do, UNTIL they shove it in my face.

The Times, as well as this woman, had an obvious agenda. I understand that's the medias sole purpose, to shock, but they had no right to drag a minor into their propaganda. A minor who has no clue or say into how this is going to affect his future I might add.


Want to add that what is done elsewhere in the world really isn't a valid argument, nor is it ever. In other places in the world children are bought and sold, they starve to death, they die of preventable diseases, female genital mutation is practiced and parents can leave newborns outside of restaurants during winter in prams unattended. So using what is common or even occasional practice/occurrence world wide to support an argument such as this really doesn't hold an ounce of water. In THIS country, it isn't even close to common practice and it's going to take a whole lot more than "well it happens far far away" to make it come off as wholesome, beneficial and normal.

To be clear, I'm not saying that simply because it isn't common in our society makes it wrong, but that's definitely where the opposition comes from. It IS unusual, whether EBF moms and those who support them want to admit it or not. That's exactly why the topic made the Times cover. Sociology dictates what is considered normal. If it was a meatloaf and potatoes topic they never would have considered having it in the magazine much less throwing it a COVER. It's bizarre practice HERE, within OUR widespread social group as a nation. It was especially big news here and by no surprise. When it hit the news people were hollaring not only "gross" but "ABUSE." I am the only woman I know, even thinking back through my childhood, who nursed her children save for two daycare moms I've had just recently. Breastfeeding in and of itself is uncommon enough but EBF is literally unheard of and yes, considered repulsive and completely unnecessary. I personally was well aware of it but didn't see the use in EBF so I didn't do it with my kids, but holy buckets my eyes about pop when women on the internet try to claim it's normal and practiced everywhere in most families....as if central MN is Mars



I don't buy either that the woman was merely "naive" as she claims now. No woman with half a brain in her head would exploit her child and expose herself the way she did for a nationwide publication without having a good idea of how it's going to be presented. I call bull at her claim the original photograph wasn't posed for when it obviously was. No one stands like that, with a child at her breast, hand on hip and both staring at a camera. That "tee-hee I had no idea!" is damage control for the movement at best and a flat out lie at worst. I think she went in fierce, ticked off a bunch of non-BF mothers and families, the article ostracized BF as a practice by coming across too judgmental and now she is trying to call herself a victim?? Right......you did it, you felt it was the right thing to do, now own it.

And apologize for dragging your son through the mud along side of you while you're at it......

I usually agree with your posts, Willow, but really? It's this kind of attitude towards BFing that makes the media go to extremes to educate. Just because EBF is not common where you live doesn't mean that it is bizarre or wrong and certainly should not be compared to female genital mutilation.
I didn't like the TIME cover either because of the use of shock value, but am in full support of BF as long as is mutually desired by both mother and child, whether it be 6 weeks or 6 years. This woman is doing what she can to educate narrow minded Americans about something she obviously feels passionate about.

[Willow]

I usually agree with your posts, Willow, but really? It's this kind of attitude towards BFing that makes the media go to extremes to educate. Just because EBF is not common where you live doesn't mean that it is bizarre or wrong and certainly should not be compared to female genital mutilation.
I didn't like the TIME cover either because of the use of shock value, but am in full support of BF as long as is mutually desired by both mother and child, whether it be 6 weeks or 6 years. This woman is doing what she can to educate narrow minded Americans about something she obviously feels passionate about.

Holy buckets......

First of all - never said anything about EBF being wrong.



Second - I never *compared* EBF to female genital mutilation so settle down. I merely used it as an example to explain how what is completely acceptable in one culture doesn't by default make it acceptable in another.

People in this thread have said and implied that because EBF is common practice in other cultures, means that by default it should be considered normal and completely acceptable here.

Sorry if you don't like it, but that's not how the way social norms are dictated in any given society. If it was the entire world would be exactly the same. We'd all look the same, eat the same, behave the same, raise our kids the same and so on and on and on and on.



Third - What's narrow minded is when we look at what we do as individuals and assume it should automatically apply to everyone else. That everyone else should feel the exact same way we do about it. I don't give a rip if what I do with my kids is acceptable to others. I don't care if it's considered normal. I don't care if people want to disagree with it or label it in ways I don't identify with. If I feel comfortable with my choices other peoples opinions won't bother me.

"They" don't have to like what I do. I didn't/don't need their validation and I certainly don't expect everyone to be just like me simply because what I'm doing I think is best.....and to the contrary doing what I believe is best and feeling the way I do about the world isn't some sort of backstabby insult to everyone that believes differently.

Just because opinions differ, doesn't mean anyone is narrow minded or ignorant and needing an education. Many times it just means they've come to a different conclusion is all - AND THAT'S O.K.

What a dreadfully boring world it would be if we all agreed on everything and strived to be exactly the same.






ETA - no one set out to educate the world does so by opening with a phrase that insults the masses.

"Are You Mom Enough?"

Why not ask that of the double mastectomy breast cancer survivor mom who never had the option to even try? Because that'll open her mind right up to know that according to that article she never was, right? Or the woman who has to take medication to keep her alive that'll contaminate her supply. Or the woman who tried and tried but couldn't help that her supply dwindled when her child was just a few months old. I could go on and on here.......

[Former Teacher]

Sorry Ladies (those who disagreed with my "disgusting" title), I stand by it happyface

I, in my opinion, find it "disgusting" seeing a child that is old enough to be in school, whether preschool or older to be breastfeeding. There is ABSOLUTELY no reason for a child THAT old to be nursing.

I fully respect each and every one's opinion. I also appreciate everyone who is taking the time and voicing it.

[daycare]

Sorry Ladies (those who disagreed with my "disgusting" title), I stand by it happyface

I, in my opinion, find it "disgusting" seeing a child that is old enough to be in school, whether preschool or older to be breastfeeding. There is ABSOLUTELY no reason for a child THAT old to be nursing.

I fully respect each and every one's opinion. I also appreciate everyone who is taking the time and voicing it.

beauty of it all..........we can all agree to disagree.............

I stand in the middle on this....I dont think anything of it really. I both don't approve or appeal this...............

[sharlan]

Bfing is a personal matter. My only problem with this issue is she chose to put herself and her son on the cover of a magazine. I really think there would have been less drama had she been sitting on a sofa with her son in her arms.

I agree with the fact that what is acceptable in other parts of the world don't really have anything to do with what is acceptable here.

[youretooloud]

First of all - never said anything about EBF being wrong.



ETA - no one set out to educate the world does so by opening with a phrase that insults the masses.

"Are You Mom Enough?"

She's right. It was always meant to be inflammatory...not educational.

[AmyLeigh]

Holy buckets......

First of all - never said anything about EBF being wrong.
Sorry. You are right.

Second - I never *compared* EBF to female genital mutilation so settle down. I merely used it as an example to explain how what is completely acceptable in one culture doesn't by default make it acceptable in another.

People in this thread have said and implied that because EBF is common practice in other cultures, means that by default it should be considered normal and completely acceptable here.

Sorry if you don't like it, but that's not how the way social norms are dictated in any given society. If it was the entire world would be exactly the same. We'd all look the same, eat the same, behave the same, raise our kids the same and so on and on and on and on.

But just because something is not normally accepted in one culture doesn't mean that it is wrong, either. Why can't we learn from other societies and use what we can benefit from them? We wouldn't become the same, but we might be more accepting and appreciative of other cultures. History has shown that when one culture views themselves as superior to another, it causes hatred, prejudice, fear, and violence.

Third - What's narrow minded is when we look at what we do as individuals and assume it should automatically apply to everyone else. That everyone else should feel the exact same way we do about it. I don't give a rip if what I do with my kids is acceptable to others. I don't care if it's considered normal. I don't care if people want to disagree with it or label it in ways I don't identify with. If I feel comfortable with my choices other peoples opinions won't bother me.
What is narrow minded is not looking at something that is different, that takes you out of your comfort zone and saying, what can I learn from this?

"They" don't have to like what I do. I didn't/don't need their validation and I certainly don't expect everyone to be just like me simply because what I'm doing I think is best.....and to the contrary doing what I believe is best and feeling the way I do about the world isn't some sort of backstabby insult to everyone that believes differently. "They" don't have to like what I do, but "they" don't have to make me feel wrong or disgusting for doing it, either.

Just because opinions differ, doesn't mean anyone is narrow minded or ignorant and needing an education. Sometimes it does. Some people's opinions reek of ignorance. Many times it just means they've come to a different conclusion is all - AND THAT'S O.K.

What a dreadfully boring world it would be if we all agreed on everything and strived to be exactly the same.

But how horrible the world would be if we felt our way was the only way ever. Meeting different people from different background and having conversations such as this is the way for us to come together as the human race and learn to get along. When I disagree with someone about anything, I ask them why they feel the way they do. I engage in a conversation. As Aristotle once said, "It is the mark of an educated mind to entertain a thought without accepting it."


ETA - no one set out to educate the world does so by opening with a phrase that insults the masses.

"Are You Mom Enough?" I said Jamie wanted to educate. TIME wanted to sell magazines. From what I have read, the AP community did not like the way that the journalists pitted those of differing parenting styles against each other. It's like the mean girl saying to one girl "your bff really doesn't like you", then going to the bff and sayingthe same thing, just to enjoy the fight that ensues.
Why not ask that of the double mastectomy breast cancer survivor mom who never had the option to even try? Because that'll open her mind right up to know that according to that article she never was, right? Or the woman who has to take medication to keep her alive that'll contaminate her supply. Or the woman who tried and tried but couldn't help that her supply dwindled when her child was just a few months old. I could go on and on here.......
Again, I HATED TIME's cover. Jamie didn't like it. But she was interviewed and used as a model, not a magazine editor. I never would insinuate that a woman who didn't BF is less of a mother. That is ridiculous. But I thought that the general disgust was the picture. She is in the news again because she is featured in a holistic parenting magazine, again with pictures of her nursing her older son. Her purpose is to encourage and educate moms like me, who didn't see EBF because it wasn't spoken of or seen a lot here, either. I got a lot of flack from coworkers (who were social workers in family services) for still nursing when my oldest turned 1. It was only when I found an online community that let me know that it was okay that my dd and I weren't done with our nursing relationship. I was encouraged to follow my instincts and follow my dd's lead. When she was done, she was done. There was no difficult or traumatic weaning period at all. That happened with my younger two, also.

Answered in green, my fave color.


My beef isn't necessarily the EBF issue. It's the (general) refusal to look further into something before coming to a conclusion about it.

ETA: For the record, I am not upset, nor mean to appear to be flaming. I enjoy a good debate, one that can be done with a clear head and a view to understand. I haven't had one in a while, so I apologize if anyone is offended by my statements. They are to be taken to mean the general public, not anyone specific here. As we all know, there is no tone to the written word, so I wanted to clarify. I view everyone here with the utmost respect and have learned a lot from each and everyone of you. Whether or not I agree.

PS, sorry if this is disjointed, I had hundreds of interruptions.

[My3cents]

What she wants to do in the privacy of her home is her business but she's opened it up for the world to see and comment.

My concern is for the son, who's name is broadcasted all over these articles and photos are out there for all to see. I see him being teased in school over this. I can see it now - "here comes booby boy." You KNOW it's going to happen.

If she wants to nurse her sons until they're 10 that's fine but I think she needs to think more about what she is doing to her kids with all this publicity.

I had to chuckle about the advertisement prior to the video. ::

If he is teased in school, shame on whoever is doing the teasing and the teachers that are allowing it. Live and let live. Kindly please- If it is not for you ok, that is fine. but if it is your thing, so what---

Irritating!

[Country Kids]

I have my own personal story on bf but I was made to feel very badly because I didn't/couldn't breastfeed.

I had planned on doing in even though family thought it was odd (said only hippies do that, oh wait that is me/more earthy but still-) but I went right ahead.

Baby just didn't get enough. Nurses thought it was odd even in the hopsital that babys ****ed bottles down like crazy. I was in the hospital for almost a week after delivery.

Joined a LaLeachie league and was very excited. Saw a bf nurse here in town and thought we were set to go.

I would nurse for 20 min. per side and baby would still take a 2-4 oz. bottle. Then diaper change and back to bed only to be up 1 1/2 hour later. I was a walking zombie!!!!!! I couldn't get anything done barely showered, could hardly eat, etc.

Baby was loosing weight and finally doctor said I think baby would do much better on the bottle only. I was so relieved to here that! When I went to the next meeting for bf, I was pretty much snubbed and politely told only bf moms attended. I was so sad as I just wanted to belong to some group of moms that had babies. I didn't care how they ate, just that we were all moms needing some support!

The next 3 bf like crazy but I didn't go back to the bf support group. They had burned their bridge with me!