Mom's That Stick Around Too Long

[Francine]

How do you discourage Mom's from hanging around? I have a new little guy that just started this week, yesterday the Mom comes in and sits down and says something like " I was thinking that I should get to know you" and then started asking questions about whether I like coffee, do I like tea, how do I take me coffee etc. etc. Getting to know my morning beverage choice but not really asking any questions about me. So I'm trying to decide, was she hinting that I should offer her a cup of coffee or is she going to start bringing me Starbucks every morning ???? It just seemed kind of funny the " getting to know you" questions that she was asking.

I am NOT going to offer her a cup of coffee in the morning, NO WAY she needs to start dropping off and leaving. But what if she shows up with a cup for me and a cup for her? We shall see in about 20 minutes!

[tymaboy]

That was my thought reading the 1st half is that she might bring you coffee or something in the morning. Those are odd 'get to know you' questions. I also go over the quick drop off at interview time.

[Francine]

Well she didn't bring coffee this morning but she did stay for way to long, finally she did say " I'm not going to be able to do this" so it gave me the opportunity to say " no, you are going to have to drop and go, stay just makes it worse".

This is the one year old that goes down for a nap with an 8 ounce bottle of milk at home, I'm not going to do that but when he is up he can drink as much as he wants. So this morning she says " can you try to give him more to drink, he was so thirsty when he got home last night" Good Grief! This is also the one year old that weighs 30 pounds...maybe he doesn't need so much milk.

[JenNJ]

The "stay too long at drop off" parent is the WORST! It just makes the little ones confused and makes for a much more difficult goodbye.

I hope that next week she drops and leaves!

[QualiTcare]

Well she didn't bring coffee this morning but she did stay for way to long, finally she did say " I'm not going to be able to do this" so it gave me the opportunity to say " no, you are going to have to drop and go, stay just makes it worse".

This is the one year old that goes down for a nap with an 8 ounce bottle of milk at home, I'm not going to do that but when he is up he can drink as much as he wants. So this morning she says " can you try to give him more to drink, he was so thirsty when he got home last night" Good Grief! This is also the one year old that weighs 30 pounds...maybe he doesn't need so much milk.

THIRTY pounds?! WTF!!

yeah, sounds like a concerned parent.

[originalkat]

I have a mom who says good-bye to her child like 10 times..."Okay, give mommy a kiss and a hug, I have to go." 15 minutes later she leaves. I think she comes early just to have time to hang out. I just go about my business and dont pay much attention.

[Crystal]

Yep....he doesn't need that much milk. Let her know that he can have all the water he wants, but milk is at mealtimes only. He's one.....doesn't need a bottle AT ALL, and if he does have a bottle, it should NEVER be milk, only water. Weight and baby bottle tooth decay are factors to consider when giving children bottles.

[pigletsmommy]

I have a mom that stays too long at pick up. I have tried every hint in the book. Even straight out told her that she needs to pick the kids up & go.

Her oldest (boy, just turned 4) is good for about the first 2 minutes she is here. When I am giving her a rundown of their day, he starts bouncing all over the place. If she doesn't pay attention to him, he will start to hit & kick her.

I make it a point to have all their things together & even put their shoes on within 10 minutes of her arrival. All I have to do is tell her how they ate & slept, then she can go. Somehow she always drags it out. I don't know how much more blunt than I can get with her.

Oh and this is my parent with a 34lb girl who is 20 months. (Probably more now, she was 34lbs at her 18 mo check up).

I've just come to the realization that some of them will never get it.

[Francine]

Yep....he doesn't need that much milk. Let her know that he can have all the water he wants, but milk is at mealtimes only. He's one.....doesn't need a bottle AT ALL, and if he does have a bottle, it should NEVER be milk, only water. Weight and baby bottle tooth decay are factors to consider when giving children bottles.

This is exactly what I am doing, this week I did give him the bottle but with about 3 ounces of water at nap time, next week he will get half of that and then none. I actually put him on my scale yesterday because I wanted to see,yep 30 pounds.

[momma2girls]

I have a mom that stays too long at pick up. I have tried every hint in the book. Even straight out told her that she needs to pick the kids up & go.

Her oldest (boy, just turned 4) is good for about the first 2 minutes she is here. When I am giving her a rundown of their day, he starts bouncing all over the place. If she doesn't pay attention to him, he will start to hit & kick her.

I make it a point to have all their things together & even put their shoes on within 10 minutes of her arrival. All I have to do is tell her how they ate & slept, then she can go. Somehow she always drags it out. I don't know how much more blunt than I can get with her.

Oh and this is my parent with a 34lb girl who is 20 months. (Probably more now, she was 34lbs at her 18 mo check up).

I've just come to the realization that some of them will never get it.

This is what I do as well. About 10 min. before it is time to go, I have them, or I place their shoes, coats, etc. on, and wait by the door for their parents. THis has helped out alot!!!

[Unregistered]

Uggggg....I have a dcd here that used to do that ALL the time...he actually sat down one day and stayed and stayed and stayed...and then announced that he had the day off and it was so nice that he had time to stay and "chat"....I was HORRIFIED!! I don't like this dcd at all and I certainly did not want to chat with him!!

I started doing things to get ready for the other kids, told his son that we were going to the kitchen to get his breakfast and to say goodbye to his dad...I finally grabbed the phone and said I HAD to call my grandsons right that minute to make sure they had gotten up and ready for the bus (they are 12)....he finally got the hint and left but I was shaking with anger by the time he left...what the heck is wrong with some people??

If anyone can come up with a really good, but not too ignorant a response to people like this, I'd love to be able to use it...

[TGT09]

I only have one that hangs around much too long in the morning. We both stand there awkwardly and don't even say anything....I don't know why they put off the inevitable! Luckily, she's a teacher and the summer is limited interactions since dcb only comes randomly.

[melskids]

i have good families right now but i had to share....

when i worked at a center i had one dad who would stay FOREVER. one day he was sitting on the floor playing with the kids, and he laid down and FELL ASLEEP he slept for a good 45 minutes.

he was also the type to say goodbye a 1000 times, to the point of purposely upsetting his kid, and then say, "emmy, do you just want to come home with me?" (he worked from home) WTH, why bother coming in the first place i just dont get some people....

[skittles]

If a parent stays too long I will put them to work. I usually will hand them an infant and a bottles or have them help with breakfast ect.. Usually they get the hint and the time they stay lessons each day.
Hope this helps

[Daycare Mommy]

Uggggg....I have a dcd here that used to do that ALL the time...he actually sat down one day and stayed and stayed and stayed...and then announced that he had the day off and it was so nice that he had time to stay and "chat"....I was HORRIFIED!! I don't like this dcd at all and I certainly did not want to chat with him!!
.....
If anyone can come up with a really good, but not too ignorant a response to people like this, I'd love to be able to use it...

If you aren't comfortable with him there, I'd just tell him, "I'm sorry, but I'm not available for this during the day since I am working and if you'd like to set up a conference after hours I'd be more than happy to do that. How about tonight at 5?" Then you can arrange for your husband (or whoever) to be there in the house too.

And this second part is just me personally since I'm only contracted to watch kids while the parents are working, so if you don't care in your daycare that's fine too! I would also say, "Well we need to be getting on with our day and since you are off today I'm sure you guys have all kinds of things to do." Then maybe make some suggestions, "It's a beautiful day for the park," or, "I think the library has a storytime coming up. Johnny let's get your shoes on so you and daddy can get going."