1 Year Bit Everyone Today !!

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  • Willow
    Advanced Daycare.com Member
    • May 2012
    • 2683

    #16
    Originally posted by SilverSabre25
    And what if the biter belongs to you? As in, is your own child?
    I'm not sure exactly what you're getting at?

    I would extinguish the behavior or the ability to perpetuate the behavior, in the exact same way as I'd respond as if I were just the provider to the child.


    If I couldn't stop my own child from hurting other people's children in my care I likely wouldn't continue on doing daycare. I wouldn't be able to justify other kids getting physically harmed just because of a deficiency on my part. That would go for any form of assault...hitting, kicking, pinching, slapping etc. If I can't stop it, or prevent it once I know it's become a perpetual problem, then I wouldn't continue to subject others to it - in whatever context that may apply.

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    • My3cents
      Daycare.com Member
      • Jan 2012
      • 3387

      #17
      Originally posted by Provider_Manda
      No I never said she couldn't come back or that she could not stay. I think mom was just so upset that she bite 2 kids, twice. I sent her a msg. and told her that it is ok and that some kids just like to bite. And she is going to bring her back in the morning. I havn't dealt with biting since I worked in a center..so I am a little out of practice.
      I would not have told her it was ok. I would have told the mom it is not ok for her to bite and it can't continue. I would do like Silver said and keep that child as glued as possible. Not going to guarantee a no bite. I would ask the parent to talk with this child about no biting. I often find if a parent talks with the child it helps a lot. If she bit again, I would separate from the other children so she gets the message she can't do that. Most of the time they bite out of frustration but sometimes it is from teething, sometimes it is just plain fun to see what you can do to your friends and all the attention it can stir. I don't make a big deal about it and I just use NO, we don't bite. I don't give the other child much attention(especially in front of the biter) because this can cause the biter to do it to see what happens for his friends. IF it continued I would have to let that child go, because other parents will pull their kids and I can't risk that.

      I know how you feel, when something like this happens out of the blue it takes you for a whirl ride. Esp when you think you have jumped over this stage and your put right back into it out of nowhere.

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      • My3cents
        Daycare.com Member
        • Jan 2012
        • 3387

        #18
        Originally posted by cheerfuldom
        I wouldnt say "its okay" because really, it isnt. I would use the opportunity to forward to mom your policy on biting....what are you going to do at daycare to overcome this issue and what can the parents do to support you in that? let them know that you are not requiring them to pick up their daughter if she bites (right?) unless they choose to pickup early. you just need to clarify what you need from them. at this point, they feel like they are helping by picking her up early but you dont want them to think that this is a requirement, when it is not. besides that, its not a solution to the problem.
        another thing is this child is going to pick up on that real quick. If I bite someone Daddy will come get me......and I am out of here. These kids are amazing today. They learn how to manipulate younger and younger it seems.

        agree with the above....

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        • My3cents
          Daycare.com Member
          • Jan 2012
          • 3387

          #19
          Originally posted by SilverSabre25
          I would suspect teething to be the culprit, or possibly just experimenting with the action/reaction of biting.

          Not really something to terminate over, IMO.

          When a biter bites, or even TRIES to bite, I scoop up the victim and give her lots and lots of snuggles and hugs. The FIRST thing I say to anyone is to the biter and it's a VERY severe, "NO BITING. BITING HURTS." And then I turn my back. I walk away. I ignore biter while very obviously comforting the victim.

          I shadow the biter pretty closely (not "in a bubble" but closely). If my attention isn't on biter (surreptitiously of course), then biter is attached to me one way or another. Every time biter goes in to bite, my hand goes between the mouth and the victim. I have gotten adept and doing it in such a way that if anything get's bitten it's the biters own lip . "NO BITING. BITING HURTS."

          Repeated too frequently in one short span of time, biter might get thirty seconds to a minute of solitude behind a gate, or a dose of Motrin if you suspect teething to be the culprit. <--I don't usually dose for teething but when it's a biter I'll try.

          I've had several biters and have kept them each through the biting phase. Eventually we come through on the other side with the child in a stable care situation and no one the worse for wear.

          If you were a family and these children were all yours you wouldn't kick one out of the family for biting, would you?
          I do all of this except the bolded part. I used to do this. I found that the biter liked seeing his friend get a ton of attention. It was like he was doing him a favor. Of course I make sure the child is ok that has been bitten but I don't make a big deal out of either side of it anymore. Firm NO BITES, biting hurts!!!

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          • Provider_Manda
            Daycare.com Member
            • Jan 2012
            • 392

            #20
            Of course her Mother knows it is not ok for her to bite. She is a great parent, and I have a lot of respect for her. She was sincere about the well being of the other children, and you don't find that a lot.

            I told her it was ok, so she would know that she didn't have to pick her up, which didn't work cause she had her Grandfather pick her up.

            She just turned one so it is kind of hard to talk to her. But she was told "NO, biting hurts" She came back the next day and done fine, never once tried to bite anyone. So it must have just been a day to explore, cause she was not mad or upset when she done it.

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