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I recently started watching children out of my home. I have a father that is pretty moody. Currently, his son is my only client, I recently got a new client that is going to be coming Fridays only. I told his wife about it when she dropped off her son one day and she seemed very excited and happy about it. His dad however mentioned it during drop off the next day in a sort of passive agressive way basically implying that it was too much for me to have another child in my home. After this happened I interviewed with another family that only needs care on Tuesdays and they have twins. They are going to have their twins with me and I'm not sure how to tell the father of the child I'm currently watching without catching attitude. Is there a positive way that I can let him know while also reassuring him that I am fully capable of caring for the extra children and his?
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Honestly, I don't really talk much with the other daycare parents about how many kids I have or don't have. I think you should do what YOU need to do to bring in the income you need and if this DCD asks or makes a comment, you can tell him that if he ever feels that the level of care his child is receiving is not up to par, he can seek services elsewhere. -
Yes I guess I just don't want to deal with his attitude. I love his son and would hate to lose him but he needs to stop being so passive agressive.
This morning he walked in the door and said, "I think he needs a nap already." (his son) Then turned around and said, "Bye Owen" and walked out. His son was happy as could be so I don't know where this was coming from.
The mom is great, she's very easy going and sweet. She is just rarely the one doing drop offs or pick ups so I guess I may wait until I see her again to let her know that there will be a set of twins here on Tuesdays. Then she can report back to dad and take the heat. The twins won't be here until Sept. 11 so I still have some time.Comment
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I also don't know if they were expecting me to take in their son and then take in no more? I'm not sure - I do have 2 boys of my own. Jake is my 2 year old and Josh is 3 months old. Owen (the boy I watch) is 16 months old. I'm having a 2 1/2 year old here on Fridays only and the twins that will be here on Tuesdays only are 18 months. I'm doing really well with mine and Owen so far, they're getting along great and I'm keeping up with everything and having fun. So, I know that having 1 or 2 more is only going to add to the fun and socialization it's just a matter of convincing Owen's dad of that. But I guess I need to stop worrying so much about how he feels and do what I know I can and keep providing excellent care for all of these wonderful boys.Comment
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not to change the subject or tell you what to do, but just a friendly warning..
I have been doing this for almost 10 years and in my experience, it almost never works out when you take a child one day a week. They just never adjust.
I am not trying to be a debbie downer, just a word of caution....Comment
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That is good to know and I am new to this whole thing. I guess we'll see how it goes. The 2 1/2 year old is having his first day here this Friday so I'm hoping for the best.Comment
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I dont tell parents who is here on what days. I tell them the max number of kids that will be here at any given day (4 daycare kids plus my own 3 kids) but I never really say who is currently enrolled, who is interviewing, who is here or not here on what days, who is quitting, who is starting.
I would send a brief email to clarify that the max number of kids you will have in your care on any given day would be X number of kids although that doesnt mean that the max number will be reached each and every day. I think the parents have a right to know the ratio of kids to adult, but they dont have a right to tell you what to do, make you feel like you are doing something wrong, or have veto power over your business decisions.
If they cant live with that max potential, then they need a new daycare.Comment
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and if this happens again you take a deep breath, plant your feet strong, look at his eyes and say-
Excuse me?
Then do the uncomfortable stare.
If he says nothing, you've made your point. Problem solved. If he says anything ask him WHY he feels you are unqualified to do your job.
Then dothe uncomfortable stare.
I promise, if you ACT confident, people will see you that way. This guy needs a reminder that you are a professional.Comment
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Yea I had a run-in with him the day before so I didn't want to have another confrontation.
He & his wife gave me an information sheet on Owen which I thought was really cool and great to have with all of their phone numbers, Owen's favorite things, and his nap schedule. His nap schedule on the paper said he takes a nap at 10am and it's usually anywhere from 1 1/2 to 3 hours long. So I was following that schedule as requested.
Dad came in angry and said, "Can you try putting him down at 8 and then again at 1? I took him home yesterday and he was just so crabby and so tired. He didn't even eat dinner. He went to sleep at 4:30 and never woke up." I just was processing everything he told me and then simply said, "Ok, no problem."
After he left I had a moment to think - he picks Owen up at 3:15 - I told him when he picked him up that he would probably take a nap when he got home. Dad obviously didn't put him down until 4:30. If my child went to sleep at 4:30 and did not wake up to eat dinner... I would wake him up to feed him. I guess common sense isn't something that every parent has though. And to give me attitude when I was simply following their written instructions was just ridiculous. It is not my fault that you had a difficult hour with your son last night because you didn't put him down for a nap when you got home. Oh - I'm sorry your son had so much fun playing today that he is a little bit worn out.
When dad came to pick him up I said, "Just so you know I was only doing the one nap thing because that's what Kate (wife) wrote down for me." and instead of listening he responded with, "Well, yea, that's not working!" So I said, "I know kids grow and change everyday so if you ever feel that his schedule needs to be adjusted in the future just let me know." I felt that I had stood up for myself in the kindest way possible.Comment
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I do like the idea of sending an email with max number of kids. That would make my life a lot easier and I wouldn't have to really "explain" anything to anyone.Comment
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I let my families know that I'm licensed for 6 and I may have 3 or I may have 6 that day. If he wants to pay you for that many kids, then tell him you'll only take his son, but like someone else said, you're not a nanny. Don't let him boss you around, you're the boss
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